The Lady Scored.

Auckland Star, Volume XXIV, Issue 178, 29 July 1893, Page 3 (Supplement)

The Lady Scored.

Not many years ago, in a small manufacturing town in England, a steam sawmill was e rncted, wibh the necessary long chimney. Immediately on its completion, the owner began to be troubled with the ever-wary insurance agent; nor was he proof against the visits of the lisrhtning-conductor man, who paid most assiduous attention to him, for evor urging the necessity of consideration. Many were tho visits be paid, until one day, in the absence of the proprietor, he was met by the wife, a lady who, together with her husband, had worked hard in her life, and kcew the value of money. After the most/ gracious salute, and with the blandest of isuoilea, the agent explained the cause of his many visits, and thinking no doubt that he would possibly overcome the master through the wife, he began, pointing to the chimney, ' You know, my dear madam, those elevated orectiona are a source of the greatest possible danger to the locality in which they are placed unless they are provided with some arrangement for their protection. You are doubtless aware that the enormous amount of electric force which is generated in the clouds is discharged from them, and I am sure you must bavo read accounts of some of the many accidents which have happened to unprotected property. Our lightningconductor, which is now in use in nearly all the towns of the land, collects the electricity on itß discharge from the clouds, and conducts it from the top to tho bottom of tho chimney without damage to the structure, and you have the knowledge that you are living in safety in that respect. Moreover,' urged the agent, 'as our men are here now, you will not only have a reduction in the price, but the great feeling of safety in your home.' ' How far does the conductor draw the electricity ?' was the lady's query. ' Rather a puzzling question, madame ; but I should say some 600 or 700 yards, all round.' 'And the hidheßt chimneys are generally struck ?' ' Yes.' ' Are you you putcing a conductor on Mr T 's chimney ? ' ' Yes.' ' Well, then, we shall not want one. His chimney, you know, is much higher than ours, and is not 200 yards off, so that ha will catch all the olectricity near here.'