TABLE TALK.

Auckland Star, Volume XVIII, Issue 69, 23 March 1887, Page 1

TABLE TALK.

Last night of the Circus.

Criminal Sessions closed. Judge Ward " rough on larrikins." City water perfectly pure, of coureo ! Even when Garnered in the Pond ! Just so!

But it ie very wrong to " jest ao." General European disarmament talked of. It will end in emoke—the ?moko of battle. Herekino settlers are said to be short of food.

Happy thought! Good idea for " settling people on the land." Starve them to death and then "plant" them in the soil.

Why not? Dead men can voto juet as well as live ones nowadays !

■Some folks think that it is just one of Mr Hobbs's hobbies.

John Lundnn tneans next to try and "settle " the.Papakura gumdiggers.

Good job, too ! Some of them have got comfortably settled in Mount Eden Gaol.

But Mr Lundon knows too much to have Any more of them Bent there. Prisoners have no voted !

A Volunteer inquiry is to be held at Chrietchurch over the resignation of Colonel ToEswill. . , . .

Will the Auckland inquiry take the form of a court martial or of a, civil action for illegal arrest?

The Tasmanian Ministry have resigned, and Mr Fych is expected to be " sent for." The proper length for a lady's walking drees.—A little above two feet. .

An Invercargill publican has been fined £5 and costs for allowing beer to be consumed on his premises on a Sunday. ' Inspector Gudgeoo, the new Commissioner of Police, will visit Auckland shortly. He is now in Taranaki.

Monnock, the Wellington pedestrian, has failed to gain any prize in the athletic sports at Sydney. The proprietors of the Dunedin " Star " have gained an action in which they were sued for £5,000 damage for libel. Dr Wilkie, the new physician who is to havo phai^'j of Auckland Hospital, arrived fr •■. -, ; .dney yesterday.- •

. Air Brame, the protectionist lecturer, addressed'the employees of the Onion Sash and Door Company yesterday, there being a large turn out, with Mr Good in the chair. Sir Robert Stout will reach Auckland next week, and after his teetotal address ib expected to give a political speech..

There were 1,500 excursionists at Woodville yesterday to see Mr Richardson open the new railway line and plant an oak tree in front of the station.

The guileful Maoris at Thames havo taken to pilfering from shops. One native is sent to engage the attention of the shopkeeper while others appropriate the goods. Fort Chalmers Town Council have reEolved to call upon the Harbour Board to rsduce their dues, so that the direct steamers may not stop calling at that port. Most contradictory evidence has been adduced in the action against Tiinuru Harbour Bound over the loss of the ship Lyttelton. Evidence is still being taken to-day. A splended case for the lawyers ! Throughout, the French Masonic lodges there ie a strong feeling in favour of a war of revenge with Germany. Thought Freemasonry was v sort of cosmopolitan brotherhood for the cultivation of peace on earth ! Another delusion gone.

The 'fauranga natives know how to organise a big "guzzle." One morning lately, several of them purchased a cask of beer amongst them, which they rolled out on the Strand ami each in turn, with mouth to bunghole, indulged in a good long draught. Tawhinu is expected there this week — probably attracted by the "good time " promised.