Jealousy Afloat.

Auckland Star, Volume XXVI, Issue 265, 14 November 1885, Page 3

Jealousy Afloat.

o>t tho boat going up tho rivor the othor day was a couplo of whom ovorybedy soon took notice. It was plain enough that they had had a row, and that tho wife was as mad aa a wot hen. When sho had taken a seat tho husband walked up and down and glowered at overybody, and Boomed to murmur throats of vengeance. On tho deck, sitting by himself, was a red-shifted, big-fisted giant of a chap about 40 years of age. l'resontly the woman gathered up her parcels and walked over and shook his hand and sat down beside him, and began a cheerful chat, explaining, honrovor :

" My husband is terribly jealous of mo, and I wantto bother him.'

" All right, mann," replied old Hercules. "Just chatter and chin to \er heart's contont, and I'll larf and larf and slap my leg where the applauso should come in." The bold action puzzled tho husband for a few minutos, but presently he walked up to the pair and paid to the man : " Are you an old acquaintance of hers ?"

" I should remark that I was, your Honour. Knowed her fur tho last thirtyodd."

"H'm, who are you?''

" They call mo William tho Conkoror when they have time, when they don't they ctit it short to Bill the Conk, And what may yer own handle be ?" " Hump ! Mary, come with mo !" " I'm entirely comfortable," sho replied.

" Miry, I want you !"

"Which is to remark," said William as he rose up, " that when a lady puts herself under my protection^ and a fly gent comes around with his chin music, Bill the Conk, is in duty bound to pertcct her. Stranger, you skip I"

"Sir?"

" Which is to say that you will slfip or swim "

William reached out, but the husband retreated and Bat down at a safe distance, and for two long hours he must have suffered torture. Thewifochatted, William slapped his leg, and the pa?sengora winked; and, as the couple landed at one of the club houses, the man in the red shirt handed the lady ashore like a cavalier and called out:

"I tumbles to the object, me lady, and if William the Conkerer kin over be of assistance again iist gin me a blast on your foghorn and I'll be thar till death."