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Camp News (Northern Command), Volume 1, Issue 14, 2 August 1940, Page 8

He had failed to give the .correct reply to a sentry’s challenge. “Any explanation?” asked the officer on the following day. “Well, it’s like this, sir,” he said. “I knew it was Bill Atkins what was on sentry-go. ’E ain’t no pal of mine .... “So why the ’ell should I say ‘Friend’ to that blighter?” $ $ $ $ * WHY NOT? “Newie” had walked into the holy of holies, the Colonel’s hut at Liverpool Camp, without knocking. Colonel was very angry, and decided to teach him manners. “Private Green,” he bawled. “Do you think for a moment that I would walk into your father’s house without knocking?” “Yessir,” came the answer. “Indeed,” the Colonel roared, more fiercely, “How is that?” “Well, sir, he keeps the pub called the ‘Royal’ in our suburb.” ***** “This meat’s bad,” complained the housewife, throwing the parcel on the counter. ; The butcher unwrapped the meat, < smelled it. “It’s not the meat that smells, ma’am, ” he declared. “That’s the trouble”— pointing to a picture of Hitler on the wrapping. “Even his picture stinks.” * * * * THE NEW HEROISM. “Spare a copper, guv’nor, for an old hero of the battlefields, sir. I’ve survived four .wars.” Gent (feeling for coppers): How did you manage it? Kept out of ’em, guv’nor.”