ODDS AND ENDS

New Zealand Tablet, Volume XXXVII, Issue 16, 22 April 1909, Page 638

ODDS AND ENDS

Doctors and lawyers have at least one good trait in common. They never give advice before it is asked for.

Mistress : ' Did anyone call during my absence ? ' Maid: ' Yes'm, a gentleman, Mr. Material.' Mistress: 'Who?' . . Maid : ' I asked him his name, and he said it was M. Material.'

Mrs. Smith : ' When one word has a similar meaning to another, and may be used instead of it, Avhat do you call the term? I know it's some kind of spice. Mr. Smith : ' Nutmeg, perhaps.' Mrs. Smith: ' Ahl I have it; cinnamon, of course.'

The justice of the peace looked at the miserable specimen of humanity in the dock and turned to the policeman 'Constable,' he said, 'what is the complaint?' ' Rheumatics, y'r worship,' spoke up the accused answering for himself.