All Sorts

New Zealand Tablet, 17 September 1908, Page 38

All Sorts

The cheerful live longest in years and afterwards •in our regards. > ( • It is easy to attribute to foes the failures due to our own faults. - „ \ ->- ■d J?* c £ er: V.What are the three personal pronouns?' ;Fupil : : He, she, and it.' Teacher : 'Give an example of their use.' Pupil : « Husband, wife, and baby.' ' What business is Miss Gaddie in?' - - 'Oh, she's in everybody's business.'1 Wholesale,- eh?'she reSs £3? /^ * tO * b[t ° f SC *^'> A teacher ; in a certain high school once asked one ot her pupils the meaning of the word vacuum. Imagine her amusement when he replied : can't S rffc & ' *W h *»* head > but * ' Strange, isn't it?' remarked the facetious one, as he took -the vacated position in the'tonsorial chair, ( the longer you cut my hair, -the shorter it becomes ! beems so, sir,' replied he of the clippers, 'which reminds me this is the first thing you said the last time you were here.' The infant of the household was in its cradle. The head of the house was at home, peevish and fault--nndln f- ft length he became unendurable/ ~ ; u*r? Uve d ° ne nothi «g but make mistakes tonight,' he growled. , / Yes,' she answered, meekly. « I beg-an by .putting the wrong baby to bed.' . - Mamma : ' Robbie, have you earache, dear?' ' Robbie : No, mamma. ' Mamma : * Then "why do you put cptton in it?' , 4 Kobb / e : Cause you told me that I learn so little cause what goes in one ear goes out the other, and so I've plugged the other up.' Bessie's mamma was away, and her father was helping her to dress. v *i T ilV Ot wa , s to get her right shoe on her left foot, when her father exclaimed : 'Why Bessie, you're putting your shoes on the wrong teet. ' Dey's all de foots dot I got, papa,' was the tearful -A German statistician who made inquiries to find - out in which European country people 'live longest, arrived at the following conclusion :— Germany, with her 55,000,000 inhabitants, has only 78 persons who passed the age of a hundred ; while France, with her population of 40,000,000, has 213 centenarians. Eneland and Ireland have 146, Scotland 46, Denmark 1 Belgium 5, Sweden 10, and Norway, with her 2,300,000, has 23. Switzerland cannot boast of a single one, but Spain counts 410 among her 18,000,000 population. The number of centenarians is astonishing in the Balkan states. Servia has 573, Roumania 1084, and Bulgaria beats the record with one to every 100. inhabitants. - « The air of ' Fa * her O'Flynn 'is a Kerry version of The top of the Cork Road ' as first set down from Mr. Graves's whistling. He had originally heard the tune played as a jig by a famous Munster fiddler, James Buckley. Like an inspiration the words of- the son** came into the author's head in the spring of 187 cas he talked one morning to the Home Office. On reachmg his desk he set them down and sent the poem toJhe-Spectator, where it first appeared. It was not published as a song till 1882, when it was fortunate enough to attract the attention of Sir Charles Santley, who obtained a triple encore with it at one of Boosey's ballad concerts, Its success is a matter of common