FAMILY FUN

New Zealand Tablet, 23 August 1906, Page 38

FAMILY FUN

How many peas in a pint ? One p. What pain do we make ligjit of ? Window pane. What mostly resembles a cat's tail ? A kitten's tail. Why is an egg like a colt ? Because it isn't fit for use till _it's broken. When is it a good thing to lose your temper'? When it's a bad one. What is an old lady in the middle of a river like? Like to he drowned. On which side of the pitcher is the handle ? Outside. Why did the coal scuttle ? Because the chimney flue. Which is one of the longest words in the English language ? Smiles, because there is a mile between the first and last letters. What is the clifk-rence between a person late for the train and a school-nn stress ? One misses the train, the other trains the misses. When you see a man come out on the stage and shoot the ashes off a cigar which is being smoked by an assiastant, don't believe all you see. A hatpin is run through the cigar, the point Just reaching the ash. The assistant just pushed the knob at the other end and down falls the ash to g-reat applause. Of course only blank cartridges are use»l. Blindfold shooting simply means that the performer glances down his nose to a mirror fixed at an angle behind the back sight and aims straight this way as if the bandage were not there. Bieaking two glass balls with two pistols is almost as simple. One <if the pistols only is loaded, and with shot ; the other has a blank cartridge. The loaded pistol is aimed between the two halls and the shot scatters, breaking them both — that's the trick. Extinguishing several numbered candles by number on request of the audience is seldom more than a hollow joke. Behind each candle is a hole in the target. An assistant hidden behind it simply blows out the candle, taking care to blow the right candle at the right time — that is, when the pistol cracks. Painting a complete picture in a jiffy in presence of the audience is also artifice. What looks to you like an immaculate and untouched canvas is in reality a finished pictuie covered with white wash. All the ' artist ' does is to simulate painting while he merely wipes off tlie whitewash with his brush. The result is a picture that would require, if it were honestly done, at least a day's work. Those awfully heavy looking dumbbells of the strong man are sometimes somewhat hollow at the core. You will notice they are always put in the same place, preferably on a special platform, when then, a man from the audience is invited to lift them. Under the floor are powerful magnets holding the weights down. Suddenly roll the bar oft the platform and you can probably lift it in one hand, as that operation releases it from magnetic control.