KEEP MY NAME OUT, PLEASE. A HINT TO ADVERTISERS.

New Zealand Tablet, Volume XIX, Issue 46, 21 August 1891, Page 20

KEEP MY NAME OUT, PLEASE. A HINT TO ADVERTISERS.

We wonder if there is a newspaper office in existence in which this request has not been heard. For the hundredth time we heard it one day last week, tbe person making it baying, to use his own words, " got into a little tronble with the police yesterday, yon know, and don't want my friends to see it." These persons generally leave knowing more of an editor's mind than they were acquainted with before. A short time ago we called upon a certain party who resides on the Lower Clarence and asked why he did not advertise. " Oh," he answered, "what's the use? Nobody will see it." "You are mistaken," said we, " every part of our paper is read." " Nonsense," he replied, " even if people did read my advertisement they would never think of it again. I don't want to advertise." "Bat " "No bats at all. I don't want to advertise, and don't bother me any more. T'm busy," and he walked back into his store and strangled a poor little fly that was helping itself from a tin of lollies. Time passed, and we never again intimated advertisement to him, although meeting him daily. The other day, however, tbis gentleman called on our editor, looking a little uncertain as to how be would be received. We cherished no ill-feelings, and motioned him to a chair. " I suppose you have heard of that little affair of mine." " Ob, yes,' 1 said we ; " that little escapade in River street the other night. Yet, we have got the particulars." " Hush I Not so load, please," Mid he. "Of course you're going to say nothing in the Advocate about it." " And why not f It is a matter of interest to your friends and the public generally." " Heavens I Why it would ruin me I" " Oh, no ; guess not. Nobody will ever see it." " Yes they will, and it will ruin me, as sure as lam aitting here. I will be the laughingstock of the town. They will se« it." We rose, and touched him impressively on tbe shoulder. " Well, we admit the people will see it ; bnt then, yon know, they will never think of it again." — Clarence River Advocate.

Father Didon, the well-known Dominican, has left Paris for Clairvanx, to prepare his " Life of 8t Bernard." It is announced in several egregious journals that people are nndecided whether the Fife baby is or is oot a Royal Highness The infant is no more a Royal Highness (or a Highness of any description) than she is an Imperial Majesty. Tbe grandchildren of the Sovereign have no Royal " style " whatever as such, un ess the Queen chooses to confer it upon them. The Duke of Cambridge and bis sisters are only described as Royal Highnesses by favour of the Qaeen. The whole subject of Royal style and procedure was thoroughly discuseed by Mr. Charles Greville in a pamphlet which was published in 1839 or in 1840, and had been revised by Lord Wensleydale. This pamphlet might advantageously be reprinted now that the various generations of the Royal family have become so large.— Truth. Collectors of Egyptian antiquities will learn with dismay that a regular manufacturer of mummies has been discovered at Alexandria. This ingenious person made his mummies out of asses' skins, which were prepared after a peculiar method of bis own invention. He had sold such large numbers as mummies of the ancient Kings of Bgypt that he latterly found it expedient to describe them as tbe remains of the Egyptian High Priests ; but the dodge ultimately led to his detection. His manufactured Pharaohs have entirely decieved a vast number of collectors of antiquities, and it is believed that nearly all the mummies which have been brought away from Egypt during the last few years have been spurious articles. Ido not, however pity those who have been deceived, for between a dead king and a dead ass the difference is nil. — Truth. Rheumatism is caused by acidity of the blcod. It should never be neglected, no matter how slight the symptom. When a rheumatic twinge is experienced, buy 20 cents worth of gaulteria (oil of wintergreen), put ten drops of it on a lump of Bagar. Place the sugar in the mouth and permit it to dissolve. Swallow slowly. Repeat this every two hours until the last vestige of the malady has disappeared. A dose or two of Rochell* salts taken in the meantime will aad to the eficacy of the remedy. Having given tbis to many friends on the advice of an eminent physician, and in every case with bs neficial results, it occurred to us that such a good thing ought to be known by all our readers, some of whom will find it a Baying of doctore' bills as well as of suffering— New York Freeman 1 * Journal. The association known as the Union of the Christian Proprietors has lately held a congress in Paris, under the presidency of Mgr. Gay Bishop of Anthedon. Its object is professedly to awaken in the minds of proprietors a sense of their responsibilities. The founders of the association, the Comte Yvert and the Oomte da Caulaincourt, have lately received the blessing of Leo XIIL upon their work. His Holiness's words were : " The study and application of duties connected with the posßess ! on of property ought particularly to occupy Christians at the present time, and I bless from my heart those who, possessing this world's goods, try to use them for the good of society." Mr. F. Meenan, King street, reports :— Wholesale prioes— Oats : Is4d to Is 6id (bags extra), good demand. Wheat : milling, 4s 6d to 4s 9d • fowls', 3s 6d to 3a 10d, sacks included. Chaff : Market \j bare— £2 to £2 7a 6d ; hay, oaten, £3 ; best rye-grass, £3 6s. Bran, £3 10s Pollard, £4 10 a. Potatoes, kidneys, £2 0» to £2 6s ; derwents, i £1 10s to £203. Flour : roller, £12 to £12 165; stone, £11 6 ito All 16s, firm. Fresh butter, Is tola 4d; salt, nominal, for prims, 7^d. Eggs, Is, Oatmeal, £9 o*.