RESTRICTIVE LEGISLATION.

New Zealand Illustrated Sporting & Dramatic Review, Issue 1169, 5 September 1912, Page 24

RESTRICTIVE LEGISLATION.

A CLEVER SKIT ON PROHIBITION.

In addressing the Convention of the National Liquor Dealers’ Association at Chicago recently the president made some amusing remarks on the general question of prohibition. Here are a few of his “hits”: —

“1 am not one of those who believe that it is wrong for a man who has convictions to give expression to them or to try to convince others that they are sound. When Sir Isaac Newton discovered the law of gravitation he was justified in endeavouring to convince other men that it was the force of gravity which caused an apple, when it was dislodged from the branch on which it had grown, to drop to the earth instead of falling toward the sky. He was justified, I say, in trying to convince other men that his theory was correct; but he would not have been justified in de-' daring that all who disagreed with him were lunatics or in demanding that they be cast into prison. Therein he differed from most of the people who insist that absolute and universal prohibition is the only cure for such abuses of the liquor business as are traceable to the divekeepers and the proprietors of gambling joints who label their places saloons. These agitators insist that unless you share their opinions you ought to be hounded out of society. When you compel disreputable persons to cease using the saloon as a cloak to debauchery and prostitution you will make it necessary for the professional prohibitionists to try something else. In the meantime it would be just as reasonable to say that all pieaching should be stopped because some preachers go wrong as it is to insist that all liquor dealers should l o put out of business because there are tome bad saloon-keepers. What would the public say if you should adopt a set of resolutions such as this:—■

“Whereas, it has come to our notice that a preacher in Massachusetts, after seducing a girl, murdered her for the purpose of keeping his villainy from being discovered; and “Whereas, it is a well-known fact that many lawyers tamper with juries for the purpose of clogging the wheels of justice; and “Whereas, it has come to our knowledge that incompetent physicians and surgeons frequently cause the death of their patients either through ignorance in administering medicine or by malpractice; and “Whereas, the records of the divorce courts show that an alarming percentage of the marriages contracted by men and women in this country are failures; therefore, be it

“Resolved —That all preachers shall be prohibited from further preaching to women and from mingling with women or having any communication with them; and be it further

“Resolved —That the practice of law shall be absolutely prohibited in this country; and be it further “Resolved —That all physicians and surgeons shall be compelled to cease administering medicines and to refrain from performing operations; and be it further “Resolved —That marriage shall be absolutely prohibited, to the end that the divorce evil may be abolished and the peace and contentment of mankind may be conserved and protected. “If such resolutions were adopted here they would either be accepted as a joke or the general supposition would be that you were all crazy. Yet they would be no more absurd than is the contention of those who insist that because there are some bad sa-loon-keepers, all liquor dealers should be legally driven out of business.”