A SURPRISE LETTER FOR A TEMPERANCE REFORMER.

New Zealand Illustrated Sporting & Dramatic Review, Volume XII, Issue 716, 26 November 1903, Page 26

A SURPRISE LETTER FOR A TEMPERANCE REFORMER.

Mr J. R. Roberts has been conducting a seven days’ \empeiance campaign in the town of Mansfield, England, and, following what appears to be his usual mode of procedure,, he addressed forty-nine letters to vaijiqus l licensed victuallers in the them that on Wednesday evening he would be dealing with the subject of “ Compensation,” and asking

them to favour him with their views, either by letter, or by making a speech at his meeting. Forty-eight of the recipients ignored the request, but the forty-ninth favoured Mr Roberts with an anonymous and somewhat abusive epistle, the reading of which caused shocked surprise amongst the ladies and some laughter. The writer-, who signed himself “ A Licensed Victualler,” addressed* the lecturer as follows: — “ Dear Sir, —In response to your invitation, why should I trouble about you ? You are only a professional wind-bag—-(laughter) —against whom I should have no chance on the platform, having had no experience of public speaking. We have professional spouters s like yourself, only they cannot sing—(laughter) —and they would probably knock holes in your arguments, if we were so minded to waste our money and fetch one here. Uho are you ? simply no one. You- will leave this town as you fotmd it, as the only people who listen to you have had their ideas in water for years, and have got petrified. If you and your people would only make friends with the licensed victuallers, and come into contact with people who get too much drink, instead of looking upon us as your enemies, you would be able to do a little good. (Derisive laughter.) Who pays you ? I see that the proceeds of the meeting go to your expenses only. What does your wife and family exist on? Does the lady lecture also ? Hoping you will leave the true friends of temperance out of your condemnation, —I remain, vours truly, A LICENSED VICTUALLER.” Mr Roberts was very withering in his reply. “ The logic of the letter,” he remarked, “ is as evident as the courage <>f the writer. ’This letter w-ill go to my museum of curiosities. I have others like it. If this is all that the licensed victuallers can say for their trade in Mansfield, then it must be in a very sorry state.” An Englishman was standing in a bar the other day when a German entered, and noticing the other smoking a “weed,” asked the smoker to oblige him with a cigar. The Englishman was taken aback with this piece of impudence, but good-natured-ly handed over one of his fine Havanas. The German puffed away with evident pleasure. In a little while he bent forward and said: “1 would not haf droubled you, but I had a match in n ein beggit, and I did not know what to do mit it.”