Old Maid Spanks Her Niece’s Lover.

New Zealand Graphic, Volume XXXIX, Issue 25, 21 December 1907, Page 56

Old Maid Spanks Her Niece’s Lover.

George L, Holmes, conr.'ercial traveller, representing one of the biggest shoe houses of Fall River, Mass., aged 32 years, height 5 feet 31 inches (and don’t forget the half), weight 122 pounds, was soundly, thoroughly, and completely ppanked by Miss Caroline Tueker of Taunton.

The fact that the spanking resulted in his winning a bride, and in profuse apologies, explanations, and kindness on the part of Miss Tucker, and the withdrawal of all her previous objections to his marriage to her niece, Miss Annie McAdams, of course, is a salve to his injured feelings, but nothing—not even the happiness of winning the girl he loves—ever will wipe out the memory of that spanking. In fact, Holmes denies that he was spanked. He gets angry if the subject is mentioned in his presence, and furthermore he stands ready to fight with fists, guns, or swords, anything, as a matter of fact, anyone who dares mention the subject. His firm has taken much pains to prevent the story from spreading among their customers, for fe»r Holmes would quit his job rather than face the jests of his customers. Nevertheless Holmes was spanked. The fact is attested by at least four of the witnesses of the spanking. Of course, it is humiliating to any grown man of affairs to be publicly spanked—and to make the bare statement that he was so disciplined without telling the entire story manifestly is unfair to Mr Holmes, as it places him in a ridiculous position; one almost as ridiculous as that in which Miss Tucker placed him. FIGHTS IF YOU CALL. HIM LITTLE. Holmes is nice looking. He is a beautiful dresser, a good talker, and prepossessing in every way. The only trouble with him is that people have the habit of referring to him as a “nice little man.’ He objects to the “little.” Indeed he has the right to object. He lias done big things, done them in a big way, turned big business deals, made himself one of the big men in his line, and it scarcely is to be wondered that he objects to being called “little” merely because he happens to be small in stature. His brain is big, his charity is big, his disposition is big—but there is no denying that his body is small. People have referred to him as “little” and lived to repent it. Some rival salesmen, who have looked condescendingly Upon Holmes and thought him easy, have had to seek his friendship in ordor to hold part of their territory against him. Among his fellow-travellers ho no longer is regarded as little—except by st i angers. Last summer Holmes met, at Desert Island, Miss McAdams. He was there for a two weeks’ vacation, and she for the summer. At the end of two weeks Miss McAdams, who is tall, slender, and handsome, had forgotten that she at first regarded him as a little man. In fact, although she didn't know it at that time, she was in love with him — and he knew even then that lie loved her. He managed to reach Desert Island twice during the summer, and when she returned home they were engaged, or at least bad an understanding. As noon as Miss McAdams went to Taunton, where she makes her home with her mother’s maiden sister, Miss Tucker, Holmes called. AUNT REFUSES CONSENT TO MARRIAGE. Miss Tucker is large. People who do

not like her say she is raw boned. She is a big, strong woman, and does not like men, and especially dislikes small men. She loves Mss McAdams, who came to her to live as a little, girl, when she was •left an orphan, and intends that Miss McAdams shall inherit all her money. When Miss McAdams returned from Desert Island and informed her aunt of her engagement, Miss Tucker felt sorrowful. . She wished her niece all happiness, but the engagement was a shock. She however, made no opposition until Holmes arrived. The moment she saw him she decided against the matich. Holmes asked permission to marry Miss McAdams and met a curt refusal. When he pressed Miss Tueker for a reason, she said: “I’m not going to let Annie marry any little runt like you.” Being refused was bad enough, but the reason was worse. Holmes got on his dignity, coldly bowed himself out—nnd briefly informed his sweetheart that he wanted her to marry him without her’ aunt’s consent. She declined, and begged him to give her time to win over the aunt. Holmes departed hurt and sorrowful. During all the winter and spring Miss McAdams strove in vain to convert Miss Tucker to her way of seeing things. She even threatened to elope, whereat Miss Tueker grew grim and her jaw protruded. The course of true love was getting rougher and rougher. Holmes urged Miss McAdams to ignore that “cranky old maid aunt” —those were his words —whereat Miss McAdams got indignant, and vowed Miss Tucker was worth a million of men, and the dearest, sweetest relatives ever a girl had. They almost quarelled. MISS TUCKER SOUNDLY SPANKS HIM. One evening—the exact date is unknown—Holmes arrived in Taunton. He determined to make one last effort to persuade Miss McAdams to ignore her aunt’s orders, and marry him. He reached Taunton about 6 o’clock p.m. from Boston, and walked across the commons and out north towards the Tucker homestead. According to the best authentic reports, he approached the house, opened the front gate, walked up between the double rows of box elder, ascended the steps, crossed the porch, rang the bell, and stood waiting. He waited perhaps two minutes and then rang again. What happened then was witnessed and amply described by Michael and Thomas Ahearn and Thomas Doorley, who were hidden behind the box elders, and Henry Fallon, who happened to be passing along the sidewalk in front of the Tucker residence. According to their stories, the door flew open suddenly, Miss Tucker reached out, grabbed Mr. Holmes by the coat lapel, shook him violently, and, with a sudden jerk, landed him across her knee, and for two minutes proceeded to adminster one of the severest spankings ever received by anyone; and, as Miss Tucker taugnt school in her earlier days, that ought to be proof that the spanking was thorough. HE TRIES TO KICK IN THE DOOR. Then the witnesses saw Mr. Holmes, red, rumpled, and angry, wiggle loose and confront Miss Tucker. They saw Miss Tucker wilt, let out a little squeal of horror, rush into the house, and slam the door. Miss McAdams, who witnessed the finale, saw her aunt faint in the hallway. Mr. Holmes rang, pounded, beat, and even kicked at the door—but he didn't get in. He retired finally, and, half way to the gate he heard a snicker. Tom Doorley and the Ahearn boys assert that if they had not leaped the fence he probably would have killed them.

The next morning Mr. Holmes, still meditating violence, and trying to ease his outraged dignity, received a frantic note from Miss McAdams, pleading with him to come at once —to hear her aunt's explanation. He tore it up and kicked the boy who brought it. He said afterwards that the boy looked like one of those who had hidden back of the box elders. Half an hour later he received a telephone summons. Miss McAdams in agonised tones pleaded with him to come, because all her happiness depended on it. Mr. Holmes went, reluctantly, and still smarting. Just what transpired inside the house only three persons know. It is known, however, that Miss Tucker, with much agitation and shame, explained that some boys (names unknown. Michael and Thomas Ahearn and Tommy Doorley strongly suspected) had been annoying her for many evenings by ringing the doorbell and running away. They had been up to their tricks on the fateful evening, and she had determined to catch them. Mr. Holmes had happened to ring at the inopportune moment, and Miss Tucker blushed as she had not blushed in many years —not since she had a sweetheart. There was where Mr. Holmes showed himself a big man. He pretended that it was a mere trifle. He insinuated that he rather enjoyed the spanking—it made him feel so much like a boy again. He begged Miss Tucker to treat it all as forgotten. He only had felt hurt because he thought Miss Tucker considered him a naughty hoy for falling in leve with ner niece and wanting to carry her off. And he concluded by laughing and saying:— “And when Annie and I are married, aunty, you must come to live with us—and spank me whenever I’m a bad boy.” Before she knew it, Miss Tucker had given her consent and her blessing, and everything was lovely. But, when the story got to the office, and spread among his friends, Holmes did not treat it as a joke. If you want to know how he feels about it, just inquire of him if he ever was spanked, and see.—“ New York Herald.” © © ® Cakemaking. If baking powder or cream of tartar is used it should be sifted in the flour, and all the flour should be sifted before using it in the mixture. For cake and meringues, the sugar should be dry and sifted before using. A good tough butter makes the best cream and the lightest cake. Very salty butter should be washed before using.

The eggs should be as fresh as possible, and the breaking and separating should be done carefully, because one egg is liable to spoil the whole batch. The safest way is to break the eggs one by one in a cup, or if separating the whites, in two cups, before adding them to the other eggs.

When mixing cakes, it is best to have all the materials ready which go into the mixture, so the mixing can be done without interruption. Begin by preparing the pans in which the cake is to be baked; then weigh the sugar. (If butter is used, put it on top of the sugar, adding the additional weight. This prevents the sticking of the butter to the scales.) Next weight the flour, and add the baking powder or the cream of tartar, and sift it with flour into a pan or on a paper. Then break or separate the eggs, and measure the eggs and milk. If

soda is used, dissolve it in milk. Grated lemon rind and spices may be added to ithe sugar. The liquid extracts are added after the butter is creamed, with the sugar and eggs, before the flour. Put the sugar and butter in the mixing bowl. (It is best for creaming to have the butter a little soft, but not too soft, as it becomes oily.) Cream the butter and sugar lightly before adding the eggs. Have the eggs cold, and add them two at a time, and work them in well. If milk is used in the mixture, it is added after the eggs are creamed with the butter; also the extracts; then the flour is worked in. It is best to leave a little of the milk out, if not sure of the strength of the flour, and add it after ■the flour is all in, if required. If fruit or peels are used, they should be added when the flour is about half mixed in. For heavy fruit cakes, the fruits and spices may be mixed with syruji or liquor the day before using, and put in the mixture. For lifter cakes, the fruit should be soft, but dry, to prevent sinking in the cakes during baking. Sometimes it is advisable to bake the cakes on double pans when the oven has too much bottom heat, and large cakes require covering with paper to prevent their becoming too brown on top. When a large cake is fully baked, it shrinks lightly from the sides, and feels elastic to the touch of the fingers. The cakes may also be tested by sticking a splinter of wood in the centre; if it comes out dry, the cake is done. The most difficult cakes to prepare properly are mixtures which contain no baking powder—the rich pound and sponge cakes. The lightening agent in the sponge mixture is the air beaten into the eggs. © © © Dancing for Grace. A new discovery has been made with regard to dancing, which until now has been considered only a pleasant recreation. Miss Vincent, the principal of the Court School of Dancing and Deportment, London, declares that the movements of graceful dances have the most encouraging results in the cultivation of the figure. ' The gliding minuet, she says, will teach women how to walk. The Spanish movements will induce lixiomeness. A rose, a tambourine, or castanets decked with brilliant ribbons will replace the unattractive dumbed.

“The present-day girl who indulges in rough sport and athletics should pay, particular attention to beauty and figure culture,” said Miss Vincent.

“Too much time is spent on face massage and the coiffure, to the neglect of the figure, and particularly of the feet.

“We notice many ladies, well dressed and well shod, with no idea how to move their feet- correctly. The statues of I’hydias do not show the distorted joints, curled-over toes, and thickened ankles which we see to-day. “All these faults can bo cured by a careful manipulation of the body and feet, and no other exercise can insure the foundation of a g.lod carriage better than the careful study of dancing. I contend that in the early stages of training it is more Iteneficial to coax and humour the muscles by the elegant movements of the old French minuets and Spanish dances, and to proceed gradually to more forcible exercises to gain strength.**