Here and There

New Zealand Graphic, Volume XXXVIII, Issue 5, 2 February 1907, Page 24

Here and There

What Balzac Said of Women. The man who can govern a woman can govern a nation. A man who can love deeply is never utterly contemptible. A woman full of faith in the one she loves is but a novelist’s fancy. In courting women, many dry wood for a fire that will not burn for them. . Women are constantly the dupes, or else the victims, of their extreme sensitiveness. In the elevated order of ideas, the life of man is glory, the life of woman is love. Marriage has its unknown great men, as war has its Napoleons and philosophy its Descartes. A man must be a fool who does not succeed in making a woman believe that which flatters her. Marriage should combat without respite or mercy that monster whieh devours everything—habit. The mistakes of a woman result almost always from her faith in the good and her confidence in the truth. No man has yet discovered the means of successfully given friendly advice to women —not even to his own. The Indian axiom, “Do not strike even with a flower a woman guilty of a hundred crimes,” is. my rule of conduct. When a woman pronounces the name of a man but twice a day, there may be some doubt as to the nature of her sentiment —but three times! There is one thing admirable in women—they never reason about their blameworthy actions; even in their dissimulation tl :e is an element of sincerity. <®> <®> He Got Off Easy. An elderly darky in Georgia charged with the theft of some chickens had the misfortune to be defended by a young and inexperienced attorney, although it is doubtful whether any one could have secured his acquittal, the commission of the erime having been proved beyond all doubt. The darky received a pretty severe sentence. “Thank you. sah,” said he, cheerfully, addressing the judge when, the sentence had been announced. “'Dot’s mighty hard, sah, but it ain’t anywhere -near what I ’spected. I thought, sah, . dat .between, my character and dat speech of mah lawyer dat you’d hang me shore!”' ' . '■ «■ -<S> <t> -• Dentistry for Dolls. Dolls have their dentists nowadays. If their teeth happen to be knocked .out, as often happens in the rough play of the nursery, the missing chewing apparatus may easily be replaced. In most toy-shops at the present time there is a hospital department for dolls, where such injuries are repaired at reasonable prices. Dolls used always to lie made with their lips closed, but in this respect the fashion has changed, and it will be noticed that all of them now have their mouths slightly open, the lips parted in a sweet smile. This shows the teeth, which, one ascertains on inquiry, are made in Germany. The doll dentist has a pasteboard box full of them—some of them single ones—for cases where one tooth Jias’been lost—and others in sets, Jasbened together.

When a new tootli is to be inserted, the top of the doll’s head is removed, together with the wig, disclosing the brain cavity. It is then seen, by looking in>ide, that the teeth are set in plaster of Paris behind the lips, with a piece of eork to keep them in place. The plaster and cork bing removed, the new tooth-— which, by the way. Is of celluloid—is inserted, and the affair is readjusted as before. When Dolly's skull-cap has been put on again she is as sound as ever.

Mark Twain for Simple Spelling. The men who report the news of the English-speaking world are the men who can reform its spelling. At least, that was what Mark Twain told the members of the Associated Press at their annual meeting in New York. Mr. Clemens declared that only through the Associated Press can the nations of the world be reached in behalf of simplified spelling: He said : “There are only two forces that carry light to all the corners of the globe—only two—the sun in the heavens, and the Associated Press down here. I may seem to be flattering the sun, but I do not mean it so. I am meaning only to be just and fair all around. “You speak with a million voices; no one can reach so many races, so many hearts and intellects as you, except Rudyard Kipling, and he cannot do it without your help. If the Associated Press will accept and use our simplified forms and thus spread them to the ends of the earth, covering the whole spacious planet with them as with a garden of flowers, our difficulties are at an end. ‘•Every day of the three hundred and sixty-five the only pages of the world’s countless newspapers that are read by all the human beings and angels and devils that can read are those pages which are built out of Associated Press despatches.

“And so I beg you, I beseech you —oh, I implore you—to spell them in our simplified forms. Do this —daily, constantly, persistently for three months —only three months—it is all I ask. The infallible result? — victory, victory all down the line. “For. by that time all eyes here and above and below will have become adjusted to the change and in love with it, and the present clumsy and ragged forms will be grotesque to the eye and revolting to the soul. And we shall be rid of phthisis and phthisic and pneumonia and pneumatics and diphtheria and pterodactyl, and all those other insane words which no man addicted to the simple Christian life can try to spell and not lose some of the bloom of his piety in the demoralising attempt.” <s> Conduct of Horses While in Battle. The lists of killed and injured after a battle seldom refer to man’s most faithful friend, the horse; yet his part in warfare is of the greatest importance, and he suffers on the battlefield quite as much as the man, without man’s hope of honour and fame in victory. The horse is, in many respects, an unusual creature, and nowhere does his unique individuality show itself as clearly as on the battle-field. When horses are liit in battle they stop, tremble in every muscle, and groan deeply, while their eyes show wild astonishment. Daring the battle of Waterloo some of the horses, as they lay on the ground, having recovered from the first agony of their wounds, fell to eating the grass about them, thus surrounding themselves with a circle of bare ground, the limited extent of which showed their weakness. Others of these interesting animals were observed quietly grazing in the middle of the field between the two hostile lines, their riders having been shot off their backs, while the balls that flew over their heads and the tumult behind and before them caused no interruption to the usual instincts of their nature. It was also observed that when a charge of cavalry went past, near to any of the stray horses mentioned, they would set off, form themselves in the rear of their mounted companions, and, though without riders, gallop strenuously along with the rest, not stopping nor flinching when the fatal shock with the enemy took place. At the battle of the Kirb, iu 1754, Major Macdonald, having unhorsed an English officer, took possession of his horse, which was very beautiful, and immediately mounted it. When the English cavalry fled, the horse ran away with his

captor, notwithstanding all his Effort* to restrain him; nor did the animal step until it was at the head of the regiment of which, apparently, its master was the commander. i The result of the annual's sagacity in returning to its accustomed place cost’ the major his life, for he was taken pria. oner and ❖ Law Suits That Are Methuselahs. Lawyers and the law, it is universally; acknowledged, take the palm for procrastination. In the national competition for first honours as individual countries, France possesses three Methuselahs of litigation which will be found too hard to beat. One begun in 1210 by the Comte ds Nevers against the inhabitants of Donzy, went on till 1848. A second, begun in 1254, by the inhabitants of Campau against those of Bagneres. went on till 1892. But there is a third, also begun in 1254, and by the same Campan folk, against four Tillages in Aneau, which is still .going on. All these suits are contests about forest rights and pasture rights. s><£■s■ About Mark Twain. Mark Twain quotes in a recent instalment of his autobiography his daughter Susy’s description of him: “ Papa’s appearance lias been described many times, but very incorrectly. H» has beautiful grey hair, not any too thick nor any too long, but just right; a Roman nose, which greatly improves the beauty of his features; kind blue eyes and a small moustache. He has a wonderfully shaped head and profile. Ha Iras a very good figure—in short, he is an •extraordinarily fine looking man. All his features are perfect, except that he hasn’t extraordinary teeth. His complexion is very fair, and he doesn’t wear a beard. He is a very good man and a very funny one. He has got a temper, but we all of us have in this family. He is the loveliest man I ever saw or ever hope to see —and. oh. so absent-minded. He does tell perfect) delightful stories. Clara and I used to ? it on eaeh arm of his chair and listen while he told us stories about the pictures on the wall.” Naturally enough, that part of Mark Twain’s “ Autobiography ” which told of the great humorist’s meeting with Robert Louis Stevenson has attracted special attention abroad, and one reviewer, quoting Mark Twain’s description of the excessive slenderness of Stevenson, and the smouldering fire of his splendid eyes, is reminded of a description, curiously similar, by John Morley: “Stevenson’s was so thin that it looked like a kind of scaffolding for holding up his eyes, and his eyes were like lamps.” s><s>s> Tree Under WThich St. Luke Sat. There are many venerable and famous trees in the world, and nearly every community has a specimen or two whieh it regards’with special pirde and veneration, but all these seem to be in the first flush of youth when compared with the great plane-tree on the island of Cos, in the Aegean Sea. This tree stands in the main street of the principal town, which also is called Cos. Under its branches tradition says both St. Luke and St. Paul rested. It is a huge tree, eighteen yards in circumference and over two thousand years old. It is surrounded by a podium, or raised platform, breast-high, doubtless built to support the trunk of the tree after it had become hollow and weak from age.

The lower branches are still well preserved, and have been shored up by pieces of antique columns, over the upper ends of whieh the branches have grown like caps, in consequence of the pressure of their own weight. Close by the tree is a soli d marble seat, which is said to have been the chair of Hippocrates, the Greek physician, called “The Father of Medicine,” and it is supposed that he taught the art of healing from that seat. He was born at Cos, 460 B.C.

This gives a clue to the great age of the celebrated plane-tree, which must be considerably more than two thousand years old. The Sultan has given orders that the tree be very carefully guarded against the depredations of relic-hunt-ers.