AS SEEN THROUGH WOMAN'S EYES.

New Zealand Graphic, Volume XXV, Issue XXII, 1 December 1900, Page 1041

AS SEEN THROUGH WOMAN'S EYES.

Mother Hints. PUTTING BABY TO BED. Never let baby get into the habit of expecting to be rocked or sung to sleep. Teach him from the very first to do without attention of this sort, or later on you will probably have to waste hours teaching him to go to sleep like a rational human being. Besides, it is exceedingly bad for him to lie shaken up and down just after a meal, as one's common sense would tell if one took the trouble to think. FOR RICKETS. Cod-liver oil is a valuable remedy for rickets, and may be given to the tiniest child. The dose is about 20 drops, twice daily, increasing gradually to a teaspoonful as the child can digest it. It must not exceed this unless ordered by a doctor. Always remember that the sooner a child suitering from rickets is properly treated the better, as it simply goes from bad to worse. A POISONED FINGER. If either of the little ones is unfortunate enough to get this, make him hold it several times a day, for ten minutes at a time, in water as hot as he can bear, to which a little Condy s fluid has been added. The Condy and water should be a bright pink colour As soon as it turns brown it has lost all purifying power. As soon as it is taken out of the water wrap the huger in a bit of clean rag spread with boraeic ointment. Bind a piece of oiled silk over, or use one of the indiarubber binds sold by chemists. COLD-WATER SPONGING. After a healthy child is a year old it is an excellent plan to quickly sponge him over with cold water directly after giving him his bath. Do it as rapidly as possible, and give him a brisk rubbing afterwards till he is all aglow. The little one soon grows to like it, and the sponging, besides

strengthening him, will make him far less susceptible to cold. CHILDREN’S FOOD. Milk and eggs are the mainstay of children’s dieting, being a whole and complete food, either being quite enough to support life without anything else. Eggs should be lightly boiled, and eaten with bread and butter. or broken over boiled rice. Milk is always safer when boiled, and should lie taken at every meal by voting children, it being the most healthy drink a child can take. O O o o O Chinese Babies. The people of China having become so 1110011 in evidence, it will perhaps interest some of our own matrons to learn some of the peculiar customs connected with the Chinese babies. The Chinese baby is not clothed like our own in the purest white, but is always habited in clothes of the brightest colours. usually scarlet. Round his wrists a red cord is tied, which is supposed to make the little man docile and obedient in his future life Should a child be disobedient or difficult to control, a common remark is. ■■Surely his parents forgot to bind his wrists." Hound his n ck is another piece, of red cord, to which are attached a number of small objects by wav of charms, which will guard him against evil spirits and no end of childish complaints. Copper coins hung round his neck are suppose 1 to insure against attacks of colic and other evils. At the age of a fortnight offerings are laid before the family shrine of the goddess called •‘Mother," and at the age of one month —-if the baby be a bov, and particu’arly a first-born son—si grand feast is given i i honour of the happy day. to which all rela fives, and. indeed, connect! ns from near and far. are invited, all of whom are expected to bring presents of one sort or another. The great event of

the day is the shaving of the child’s head, an operation which takes place before the ancestral tablets. < r shrine of Mother, as the case may be. The child’s grandmother is the most important personage at the ceremony, and, amongst other presents, always presents the bady with a little cap. ornamented with eighteen metal figures of the disciples of Buddha, whicn are supposed to attract all good influences towards the wearer. It may be here observed that it is only the ‘‘boys” who are the subjects of these festivities and presents. Should the child be a girl, instead of cmgra-.ula-tion. sympathy is expressed with the parents. The kindest remark which one ean make to the baby, is: “Ah! well, even girls are of some use.*' When a baby girl is born it is often drowned or sent to a foundling hospital so as to get rid of it. A boy usually, when quite a baby, is christened with some curious name, such as Stupid. Vagabond. Dirt; th’s in order that the evil spirits, hearing it called by these opprobrious names, would not consider it a subject of much affection, and therefore not trouble about it. A girl is some imes called, if a first child. Lai-ti i.e., “Come, younger brother," expressing the hope that the next may b.‘ a boy. If a second or third child, s nnet mes she is called Daughter Numlier One, or Two. and so on. The greatest festival of the baby's life, however, is the anniversary of his birth, when a great feast is given, to which even the most distant relatives are invit’d, and all the dainties known to the Chinese cuisine are placed on the fes a' b’ard. The feast over, a very importa t ceremony is performed. Cloth -d in a scarlet coat, the young gentleman is placed in the middle of a table standing in front of the ancestral tablets. Around him are arranged a great variety of articles significant of various professions and trades. The great question of the day then is. “Which object will attract his attention, and

being grasped by his little hamln indicate his future career in life?*’ The grandmother is usually careful to have the articles of best omen nearest to his hands, but should he grasp glittering buttons and beads, the excitement is intense, and congratulations are offered on all sides.

A Graceful Handicraft. Knitting, that favourite and becoming old pastime of many a year gone past, always has its vogue iu the summer. It is the easiest possible piece of work to carry out on to the seashore, and ean even be done on board ship, where needlework is sometimes very difficult to accomplish. It is with justice called a becoming pursuit, because any one who has watched a woman knitting knows that it shows off her beautifully-formed fingers and pretty wrists as nothing else in the world can, unless it be a harp performance, and this is a rare accomplishment nowadays. The newest things to knit are neckties and purses.

Among the neckties that are most liked are those made of two colours, usually the boating, cricket, or football club colours of the future recipient of the tie. A girl should ask some older woman she knows for a purse of bygone years and copy it precisely, whether it be of the little bag shape, which must be fitted to a steel frame, or the long ordinary kind, completed with a couple of rings and little fringe tassels. Sotpuetimes in. these, tiny gold or steel beads used to be knitted. It is fine work, but full of interest. o o o o o

P.’s and Q.’s for Girls. If your parents ask you to play after diuner to their friends, you have but one course open to you—-to do so as simply and quietly as you can. You may be painfully conscious that your playing on the piano is indifferent; but there is one consolation you can lay to heart, and that is that among the guests there will in all probability be only one or two who are judges of music, and there will lie a roomful of people who will be judges whether you do with grace what is required of you. It is generally easy to select something simple to play in which you are

quite sure of yourself, when you will give more pleasure than if you attempt something far more elaborate where you are likely to stumble. Don't turn round when you seat yourself at the piano, and say: “Oh, 1 am so nervous!” It. goes without saying that most young girls are nervous of displaying their acquirements in public. So say nothing. Take your seat with no sort of fussing, and play what you have selected as well as you ean: for you owe it to your parents, who have paid for your instruction, to do the best you can for your own credit and for theirs. There is many a music teacher who, while giving excellent advice on all subjects connected with the mechanical and poetic part of music, never gives a thought as to how a girl looks at the piano; and yet this is really an important matter to consider. To begin with, when you seat yourself on the music-stool you ought always to see that your dress falls nicely. and is not dragged all on one side or huddled up under you. Then set yourself quite in the middle of the piano, so as to have equal command over the whole instrument. You will most likely have been taught how to hold your hands, but try not to exaggerate the attitude, and don’t raise them with a flourish at the end of a passage. ’lt looks vulgar and pretentious. If you wear bangles be sure to take t hem off. Most, pieces are spoilt by the impromptu cymbal accompaniment which is produced by the rattling of bangles. Then if you fancy your playing, and know you play very well, yet you must let people talk in the room, and bear their chatter unconcernedly. When you have finished your piece, rise at once from the piano. Don’t linger on the stool as if you expee.ted to be asked to play again. MORNA BELL.

What to Eat when Cycling. The girl who cycles for miles in a day, and who plays golf as energetically as her brother, needs more food than the young woman of fifty years ago. Girls and women actually eat more foml than ever before, and this is a move in the right direction. Many, however, do not eat wisely. A great dia-tor complains that they do not wait long enough lietween meals to become hungry, and that between their regular meals they eat a great deal of trash, which overburdens their stomachs and contains little nourishment. The result is that women are irritable without knowing why, and they entirely s|»oil their good looks. Of course, if a woman does not mind having a muddy complexion, a stout and unshapely figure, a dpuble chin, and a dull brain, she can eat whatever and whenever she likes, but doing so is about as wasteful of her strength and beauty as if she were to take frequent doses of some harmful drug. Brief Hints for Bright Girls. Someone has suggested fifteen things that every girl can learn before she is fifteen. Not everyone can learn to play or sing or paint well enough to give pleasure to her friends, but the following ••accomplishments” are within Everybody's reach: Shut the door, and shut it softly. Keep your own room in tasteful order. Have an hour for rising, and rise. Learn to make bread as well as cake. Never let a button stay off twentyfour hours. Always know where your things are. Never let a day pass without doing something to make somebody comfortable. Never come to breakfast without a collar. Never go about with your shoes unbuttoned. Speak clearly enough for everybody to understand. Never fidget or hum. so as to disturb others. Never fuss: or fret.

The Marrying and the Married.

"OLD MAIDS.” Tlie expression is almost obsolete. Tie times have changed, and “old maids." like old ladies, are curiosities of the past. Many women grow old. ami many remain unmarried; but their character has altered as much as their appearance, and no one can say the world is less happy for it. Where now are the prunes and prisms of thirty years ago? Where are the tabbies and the tea-tables of Cranford memory? Where are the girls who blush and “murmur”? I never hear them murmuring. Their tones are stentorian—and as robust as I heir bodies and all their habits. These girls do not make “old maids”; they make strong-minded. independent women of the world, and if one of Trollope's heroines could come to actuality and life, she would first stare with horror, and then retire to blush unseen. Her day is over. The unmarried women of to-day can do practically anything they like without exciting comment of any kind, and they appear to the women of bondage to have an exceedingly “good time." Their single state, however mature they may be. obtains no derision. They are not jeered at as being not wanted or left in the cold. The chaff they hear is only comparable to that bestowed on bachelors. They are positively envied by the harassed married, who. in many instances. would not be loth to change places with them. PEACE WITH HONOUR. “Why marry when so happy?” is the reply they make w’hen urged to “settle.” 1 have said that nothing is better for a woman than to be happily married: but it all rests on the “happily." and it is no wonder that women weigh certain risks against happy chances. They look round them, and what do they see? Just what we all see—many, many unhap-

py marriages; and they deliberately choose the more peaceful lot. even though it may mean some loneliness and iinlovedness. and never the pride of l»eing first with somebody.

We have but to look at some women to l»e certain they had had opportunities; and if they have not had actual projtosals, it is because they will not allow men to approach them on that ground at all. They will be good comrades, nothing more. The gentler ones resist the temptation to fall in love, for they fear the price they know they must pay. The sterner ones decline to give up all their favourite plans and projects merely to be house-drudges. There are those who must marry or work, and work has a sweeter savour of independence; it almost looks like liberty at a distance. But there are those who need do neither. They can devote their time to any self-pleasing occupation they choose, no matter what name they give it. A girl told me once she knew she was too selfish to marry, and at all events she would wait until she was thirty. But at thirty she will probably find she is not quite so much wanted.

"She that will not when she may —” she is a type of many—not unpleasantly selfish, not unamiable, but not able to give up their own wills and their own ways, and contriving always to quietly escape from anything not quite pleasing to them. Why should they quit a life of such ease for one of unceasing self-denying effort ?

Everyone knows that marriage is not all “beer and skittles”; it is no golden dream —no matter how tender the attachment. It is full of trials and difficulties, and, moreover, it is

“a permanent obligation.” It has, indeed. such serious drawbacks that the spinsters and bachelors who loqk with pity upon it are not to be blamed; and if they will but try to be good aunts and uncles we will even forgive them.

As for persuading them to join our ranks perish the thought! We all remember the story of the fox that lost his tail, and if we don't, they will. Besides. we like them as they are, when they are obliging and useful; and it suits our purpose to restrain them from the quest of any special happiness on their own account. FULSOME FREEDOM.

But the way in which bachelors flaunt their freedom in the faces of willing aspirants to favour would be most annoying were it not balanced by the light-hearted spinsters who boast equally of theirs. We don’t mind a woman remaining unmarried if, as she grows older, she will guard against angles and Crotchets. self-sufficiency and dulness.

You may be very highly educated, you may be an excellent Greek scholar. but if you can think, talk and breathe nothing but Greek prose you are a dull dog. Y'ou may be very useful as an intellectual machine, but you are not a woman.

And you must not suppose, because you stand on a pinnacle in a little clique of other learned spinsters, that you know more than men, and are vastly superior to them. Men ean do everything better than we can. except loving. Education should develop women into becoming better companions for men; it should bring us nearer to men—not drive them away, as it is apt to do when presented in the unlovely mind of a conceited, unwomanly woman. Do justice to yourself and shun these failings and all personal eccentricities. and what a charming companion you can be to men—what a refreshment to married women who have not the time or opportunity for self-culture that you have! Y’ou can store your mind year after year, but you must store your heart also. Let it ever grow more tender with compassion for what you will never have to suffer.

Poultry-Raising for Women. “Raise poultry,” said an experienced woman to a young friend who asked how she eould get the best living in the most comfortable fashion. "R>ise poultry. There is nothing within the range of woman's capability to-day that is so profitable and altogether manageable as poultryraising. Once get a bit of a start, and with any kind of reasonable management there is no doubt about making a fair living. Don’t understand me that 1 have any idea about your getting rich out of it. The fortunes that are made in the poultry business are few and far between, but a comfortable competence ought to be realised by anybody who has reasonable sense and plenty of patience. Of strength not a very great amount is required, although one should not be an invalid and undertake such labours, for it is instant in season and out of season and work that cannot lie neglected no matter what the feelings of the proprietor of the establishment may be.

"In starting in this business there is one thing to be kept very prominently in view, and that is: Do not branch out at the outset. Go slowly and carefully at first, begin in a small way, and if not familiar with the business, invest very little until experience comes with practical observation. It is not wise for a beginner to attempt anything with an incubator. It is expensive and risky, and repeated failure has demonstrated to many of those who have tried it that unless conducted on a rather large scale and handled by an experienced person, it is likely to cost more than it comes to. Old hens are cheaper and safer than incubators. With careful management, it is possible to hatch about ninety per cent, of the eggs put under the hens, and in many instances eighty per cent, have grown to the broiler age. With the incubator thev laek the natural vitality of the

parent bird, and are neither as robust nor active as chickens brought up by the hen.

**lt is much more satisfactory to hatch a less number of chicks ami haxe the majority of them grow than to incubate an immense number ami lose half of them. One has neither the cost of the eggs nor the plant to figure on. the loss u(M>n which is no inconsiderable item. If chicks are hatche<l in February ami kept comfortably warm, ten out of every twelve ought to live to a profitable age. Incubatorraised chicks are almost worthless for layers. They are very pretty-looking, but seem to lack something, ami never give the satisfaction that one may expect from birds brought up in the natural way. After all is said and done, the good dame. Nature, has very comfortable ways of her own. and it would bother her oftentimes too smart children to improve upon her results.” Short Skirts Gaining. The short skirt has at last, so say many authorities. found some small favour in Paris. Perhaps the summer invasion of American girls in walking skirts has wrought the miracle, but whatever the cause, Parisian tailors have evolved what they call “the exposition skirt." It is merely a graceful round skirt, clearing the ground by about two inches, and is startling in no way, save that Paris, of the frou-frou skirts and trailing robes, is giving it sanction and endorsing it for street wear in the autumn and winter. Perhaps, after all, the emancipation of woman is within sight. The ultradelicate and feminine creations designed for the season's housewear will maintain a desirable balance; but the rumour that sweeping street gowns are doomed grows apace.

One Mistake which Mothers Make. The mistake of mothers in the educational line is to think that they must insist that their children, one ami all. however different in taste or quality, shall l>e ground out through this mighty machine. Mothers do not need to make their children victims of this system. The system can lie made to l>end. in many cases, if mothers will only go about it in the right way. A mother complained, not long ago, that there is. in this day and generation, little reverence for parents. Thia is probably true. But why? Are the parents of to-day compelling reverence by living their lives so firm, and fine, and fair, anil strong that the children needs must reverence them? Kexerence cannot be forced out of a child on demand, or by saying it ought to be; but any mother can command it by being the kind of |>erson a child can reverence. Better far. however, than the old idea of awe which our forefathers inspired in their children, if that is what this mother meant, are the close. Iteautiful friendships we are learning to-day to establish with our children; the comradeship which jogs along with them in work and play, in all their experiences, great and small—friendships with the love and sympathy that never fail, no matter how trying these experiences may be. o o o o o Court Mourning. Now that so many countries are plunged tfnto <srief over the loss of King Humbert of Italy and •the Duke of Saxe-Coburg, mourning such as prescribed for by the court is being worn. In England it is customary to mourn for our King or Queen three months; for a son or daughter of our Sovereign, such as is the case now for the Duke of Saxe-

Coburg. it is to Im* six weeks; for a brother or sister of a Sovereign, only three weeks; for an uncle, aunt, nephew, or niece, the Court goes into mourning for two weeks; while from three to ten days is usual for a cousin, according to relationship. The Royal regulation for the first period is a black dress, white gloves, black or white shoes, feather and fans, white pearls, diamonds, or plain gold and silver ornaments may Im* worn. For the men. black Court <lress with black swords and buckles. At the end of that period, which is generally a third of the whole, according to the rank of Royalty being mourned for, the costume is changed, the ladies then wearing black dresses with coloured ribImjiis. Howers, feathers, and ornaments, while the men remain as liefore until the Court goes out of mourning. For the military and other Royal servants a black crej>e band is fixed to the left arm for the time specified; while at night the handle of the sword is also to lx* enveloped in crape. In different countries different mourning colours are used, but all over Europe black is universal.