TRAMCAR ETIQUETTE FOR LADIES.

New Zealand Graphic, Volume XV, Issue XI, 31 August 1895, Page 251

TRAMCAR ETIQUETTE FOR LADIES.

INVALUABLE ADVICE. Always stop a car in the middle of the street, especially if it is in full speed. Do not go to the crossings where the cars are expected to stop and are willing to do it. By stopping them at different points of the road you retard their progress and give the driver a chance to rest. Just as a car starts, suddenly make up your mind you want to get on it. The driver will enjoy coming to a standstill again. The conductor always enjoys this. Hail a car and have it stop while you are a good distance from it. Having done this, walk leisurely toward it. You will observe the conductor, with whistle in mouth, leaning anxiously toward you, and the passengers looking in your direction, to say nothing of the driver, gazing viciously around the corner of the car. Let none of this disturb you. Take your time and be oblivious to all the scowls about you. Do this with a sweet placid smile. As you mount the step scowl at the conductor as though he were neglecting his business. It will nonplus him and prevent any remarks. TO STOP A CAR AND THEN NOT GET ON IT IS QUITE the thing, and affords some amusement to all concerned. In getting on a car do so with slowness and care. Put one foot on the first step keeping the other on the ground This prevents the conductor from starting. If the car is not full pause at the door, and as you do so, seemingly criticise those therein, and select the one beside whom you will sit. Make sure, however, that your selection is at the further end, as it will give you AN EXCELLENT OPPORTUNITY TO STEP ON THE TOES OF THE OTHERS AS YOU PASS ALONG. If the car is nearly full and there happens to be a small space between any two of the passengers, even though it is not large enough for you, make you way straight toward it. Gather yourself together as you hover over the spot, let yourself drop suddenly, and trust to Providence for the rest. The chances are greatly in your favour that the space will be enlarged for your comfort. If you see anyone about to try this neat little trick upon you frustrate it by suddenly occupying the space the other calculated upon. The person will sit upon you and will ordinarily become confused at the mistake, and will show surprise when he discovers the space is gone. Never move to make room for anyone else ; crowding yourself up to your neighbour is abominable. Let them stand. MAKE IT YOUR RULE TO TAKE ALL THE ROOM YOU POSSIBLY CAN. When once taken, keep it if you can. Never wait for a car that is not crowded. The more the merrier. If people are hanging on stop the car and force your way in. People like it, especially on a wet day. If there are no seats unoccupied, select some man, stand before him and just glare. If that does not have the expected effect sigh, get very uneasy, stand on one foot and then another, step on the man’s foot once in a while. He will get up at last, then drop into his seat. NEVER THANK A MAN FOR GIVING YOU A SEAT. It is his duty. Remember the ‘ rights ’ of your sex always. A woman with a lot of packages is always welcome on a tram car. It makes her look pathetic and interesting, and she can amuse the passengers by allowing them to pick them up off the floor for her as she drops them.

An umbrella, with a woman behind it, in a tram car is immense. It is needless to point out the fun and amusement that can be derived from the combination. If you carry a bag be very careful to PUT it on The floor so that people may trip OVER IT, or if you have shawls and other packages place them beside you and do not remove them if anyone should desire the seat. When the conductor enters to take up the fares do not see him till he calls vour attention to the fact that he is there for that purpose. Look at him in surprise. Then proceed in a very leisurely manner to hunt for your pocketbook. Having found it, never be in a hurry to get your fare. The conductor admires you and enjoys the rest. Always carry large monev if von can. A conductor loves dearly to use up his small change in taking a fare. IF YOU HAVE CHILDREN TRY AND EVADE PAVING FOR THEM. Never offer to do this yourself, wait till the conductor asks you. If you cannot deceive him then tell the truth and pay the fare. Taking them on your lap is quite deceptive, and is apt to make the conductor think them under age. Ask the conductor all the questions you can, as. for instance, where is such and such a street, how near does he come to it, and where is Messrs Jones and Co., and the like. He appreciates the confidence you show in him. Always talk loudly in a car. Arrange to have your friend sit opposite to you. This is always interesting Then talk loudly across the aisle and thus entertain the whole car. SIT SIDEWAYS. IT WILL ENABLE YOU TO TAKE UP AS MUCH ROOM AGAIN AS YOU ARE ENTITLED TO. Two persons conversing this way are perfectly irresistible, especially in a crowded car. In getting out do not begin the movement till the car has started. This will require bringing it to a complete standstill again. Make several attempts to get out, discovering each time that you have made a mistake—it was not the street you thought it was. This will insure the conductor taking a lively interest in your case. When stopping a car put one foot on the step and ask the conductor what car it is. He will enjoy telling you. Never find out for yourself. With your foot on the car you hold him, for he dare not start for fear of an accident. You can entertain him by telling him where you want to go and ask how to get there. Sit near the door. If you have an umbrella you can reach the conductor on the platform. A STORMY DAY GIVES MANY OPPORTUNITIES FOR ACTS OF POLITENESS. If you wear a waterproof it is generally very wet, so sit beside somebody and rub yourself against him. If you have a wet umbrella lean it upon the person beside you, or hold it so the water will drip on his feet. Begin to raise it at the door as you go out, and shove it into the faces of those standing on the platform. They are generally men. They will secure their hats and dodge under your umbrella. This will give them exercise. A nervous passenger is much liked by the conductor ; therefore never fail to ask him every time he enters if it is such and such a street. And also ask the people sitting near you Everyone will then take an interest in you. and all will call out your destination at the same time.