AT HOME WITH THE LADY EDITOR.

New Zealand Graphic, Volume IX, Issue 41, 8 October 1892, Page 1012

AT HOME WITH THE LADY EDITOR.

Under this heading I am very pleased to reply to all queries that are genuine and helpful to the querist and others. Kindly write on one side of the paper only, and address to the Lady Editor.

There is but little room this week except for replies to various questions. To one point only would I direct the attention of my fair readers. It is stated in an English paper that : *lt is no longer fashionable for women to kiss one another. That women who kiss one another before a draw* ing-room full of men and women are guilty of “bad fortn”is no news, but now even the inter feminine kiss in the sanctity of the boudoir is forbidden, and the same women, who affect the aerial shake of the hand, now say to one another, “Consider yourself kissed.” This saves much straining of the collar and corset, and a possible obliteration of of artificial beauty from the lip or cheek.’

This is very welcome news to most of us, for, on the whole, kissing women are usually gushing women and gushing women are not always reliable. There are many goodnatured ladies, who will kiss anyone of their own sex on the slightest provocation. Unless one is really fond of some one else, kissing is disgusting and objectionable. A woman doesn’t kiss a man unless she really likes him—whether he is her husband or not—and why should she have to submit to most effusive salutations of this nature from women for whom she does not care twopence ? As for the kisses liberally bestowed by the kissing woman on poor, inoffensive little children, it is nauseous to reflect. Helpless little innocents I Wouldn’t you scratch the faces of mamma’s kissing visitors if you only could ! Will all my women friends who want tn kiss me kindly consider the operation finished for a couple of years at least ?

‘ La Tosca ’ writes: * It isn’t a query for some culinary information this time. What I want to know is, can’t I take some means to compel my unmusical neighbours to play the piano when lam not at home ? At least can't I have some legal protection against their playing it all night?’ Yours is by no means a solitary complaint. It ought to be against the law for anyone who cannot pass a certain musical standard to practise on any musical instrument within a radius of a mile, say, from any human dwelling, save their own. I fear there is no other way of abating what is fast becoming an intolerable nuisance. Why can’t some mothers recognise that their daughters will never play or sin? well enough to be ought bur bores in a drawing room when they attempt to perform ? Every' girl has a talent for something. Let her spend her time developing what she really possesses, not trying to attain the impossible.

An amusing trial for the possession of a dog was lately heard in an R.M. Court. To convince the court that the dog was hers, the defendant stated that if she would sing a certain song the dog, in response to his training, would join in with her in his dog fashion and voice and sing the song through This she did and at the first words of the song the dog leaped for joy and fulfilled his part of the duet to the astonishment of the spectators and the court. No further evidence was taken and the dog returned home with the lady. Think, dear *La Tosca,’ if you had this establishment next door to you. Truly, you would indeed feel dogged and morose.

* A Widow.'—No, it is not at all the correct thing to invite people with whom you have mere business relations to call upon you socially. Very possibly, this might be done under certain circumstances, and pleasant friendships might be formed in that way. But as a rule, it is better to keep your business acquaintances and your social friends distinct. Some women are extremely troublesome when, being friends of their lawyer, rent-collector, land-agent, etc., they insist on wasting his precious business hours with a long dissertation on their gardens, their neighbours, their servants, or their children. A business man’s time means his money. You have no right to waste either the one or the other.

‘ Son-in-law ' writes a pathetic epistle : ‘ What would you advise me to do to get rid of my wife’s mother ? She came to visit us when my little boy was born—four months ago to day. There is no occasion for her to remain,; my wife and the baby are perfectly well. As a matter of fact, I hardly ever see my wife now. The two women are forever fussing over that little morsel of humanity. “Its teeth” are just coming, or have come, or something of that kind, and “ its’s fretful,” so they “ never leave it to the nurse.” These are the answers I get to mild requests to my wife to come down to dinner before it gets quite cold, or to entreaties to go to the opera—there’s an excellent one on now : or to take a ride or drive with me on Saturday afternoon. Please caution all young men about to marry, lest they, too, meet with such hard luck as mine.’

lam really sorry for you. Let me see, can you not suggest a trip for change of air with your wife, nurse, and baby, and find out just at the last minute that there is no room for the mother-in-law ? Or why not have a serious talk with your wife ? Tell her that she is wilfully throwing away her happiness and yours. Tell her that her duty is to you now, and that she is bound not to neglect you. Be gentle, but above all, be firm. Hint that she will drive yon from her if she so utterly ignores your wishes, etc. I suppose it would be no use speaking to the elder lady? Can’t she take hints ?