A STRANGE DOC STORY.

New Zealand Graphic, Volume IX, Issue 31, 30 July 1892, Page 763

A STRANGE DOC STORY.

The man with the shiny coat ! He needs no introduction ; you all know him. Well, last Tuesday afternoon he gave us a look in. It was his first visit to the Graphic Office, and he found the dramatic critic, the society editor and your humble servant—the religious reporter—congratulating each other on going to press so early. ‘Good afternoon, gentleman,’ said the Shiny Man in a hollow voice, as he opened the door of the sanctum and glided in, closely followed by a mangy-looking cur of the terrier tribe. ‘ The same to you, Mr S. ’ replied the Editor. ‘ By “ the holy smoke ” of Suazzle where did you get that mongrel!’ This from the ciitic. In my capacity of R.K. I clasped my hands on behalf of Dramaticus and turned my eyes upon Shiny. He too was strangely affected, aud giving the critic a look that made him tremble, said : ‘So you don't see anything particular about that dog, eh ? If you had half the intelligence of that canine, sir, your notes would be read. I had a wash-house once that needed painting, and had not time to- attend to it personally, aud was moreover, then as now, “hard pushed.” Scrub, there, was a pup at the time, very frisky and for ever wagging his tail. See it now, gentlemen, with what grace it moves from side to side. Well, do you know, I believe that dog knew what I wanted, as one morning, prior to going to business, I stood in the back-yard surveying the shed. He came along and looked me full in the face with his knowing little eyes and ran towards the corner of the shed wheie the paint-pot stood ready, and dipping in the tip of his tail, began painting the wall. I comprehended him in a moment, and saw he was willing to work. Improving upon Scrub’s plan, however, I tied a light brush to his tail, set him to work, and believe me, gentlemen, when I returned from the city that night, not only were the lower boards of the shed beautifully painted, but the sagacious animal hail mounted a ladder leaning against the wall, and completed the whole work.’

Shiny Coat stopped speaking for Dramaticus was in a faint, and the society editor looked pale. The ‘ sagacious ’ Scrub had made an invasion of the adjoining office of the New Zealand Farmer, and was wrestling dogmatically with a mutton ham. As for me I had heard such tales before from the ‘funny men’ at church socials, so looked carelessly up at Shiny and said interrogatively, ‘ Well, what next?’ When Dramaticus had partly recovered, the Shiny Man continued : • Not only is he an accomplished painter, but in a thousand ways is he useful to me. But one example more will suffice, eh ’’ said he, turning sharply upon Dramaticus and smiling grimly. ‘ It will !’ gasped the critic, faintly, ‘ make it short.’ • Most people when they go out of a dark night in the suburbs carry a lantern. I don’t, I simply take Scrub. You observe how thinly the hair grows upon his body. Well—’ ‘ You put a candle inside him,’ I broke in. ‘No, I do not. Well, as I was just going to remark, when this gentleman so rudely interrupted me, Scrub is

very fond of fish, which article of diet, as you know in New Zealand is very cheap. Fish, then I get for Scrub, and thus Kill two stones with one bird, so to speak, for not only does it serve to keep him in the robust state of heslth which you see at the present moment he enjoys (he had just returned from the mutton ham), but the phosphorus of the tish illuminates his tender skin, and he is in very truth, “ a lamp unto my- feet and a light unto my path.’’ ’ ‘ Good afternoon, gentlemen, good afternoon ;’ and whistling the brush and lantern prodigy, the shiny Man vanished, leaving me speechless, for had he not encroached upon my domain, and stolen one of my most treasured phrases. The U.K.