CURIOUS ANSWERS.

New Zealand Graphic, Volume IX, Issue 24, 11 June 1892, Page 595

CURIOUS ANSWERS.

The schoolboy habit of giving to a question some reply other than that intended by the examiuer, often leads to answers as curious as unexpected. Thus an inspector, testing a class, asked a lad about the succession of the Kings of Israel : * And who came after Solomon ‘ The Queen of Sheba, sir,’ was the ready answer of the youngster.

Being asked what were the chief ends of man, another boy replied : • His head and feet.’ An inspector who had explained to a class that the land of the world was not continuous, said to the youngster next to him : ‘ Could your father walk round the world ?’ ‘ No, sir,’ was the quick’answer. ‘ Why not ?’ • Because he's dead.' •What is a hovel?’ the inspector asked in another class and got the answer; ‘What you live in.’ ‘Where was Jacob going when he was ten years old an inspector asked in another school ; a little one said : • He was going on for eleven.’ In the history of the Jews the lads were asked what the Red Sea was famous for ?' • Red herrings ’ was the quick retort. Girls are very shy in answering questions by the examiners. A superintendent, testing a girls’school on the Catechism, asked what was meant by • renouncing the devil and all his works.’ A watchmaker s daughter said faintly, ‘ All his inside, sir.’ The teetotaller’s son gave a similar answer to the query, ‘ Do you know the meaning of syntax ?' ‘ Yes, sir,' he said ; ‘syntax is the duty on spirits.’ Continuing his philosophy by another question he asked : ‘What is the meaning of regeneration !’ ‘To be born again,’came this time. ‘Right. Would you like to be born again?’ ‘No !' ‘ Why not?’ ‘ For fear I might he born a girl.’ This satisfied the interrogator. In testing for efficiency in general knowledge an examiner asked : ‘What is the age of reason?' An adult replied : ‘ As many years as have elapsed since the birth of the person named.’ ‘ That is a very vague answer.’ said the examiner ; ‘ I must ask you what is salt ?' ‘ The stuff that makes potatoes taste bad when they don’t put it on,’ came in reply. The examiner was willing to give the young fellow another chance to get his certificate, and said : ‘ Sit down, and write me a short paper on pins.’ The composition came out in this way : ‘ Pins are very useful. They have saved the lives of a great many men. and women, and children, and—in fact whole families.’ ‘ How so?' said the indignant inspector when he read the paper. ‘ Why, by not swallowing them,’ was the soothing reply, and the inspector departed to enjoy himself upon the mastication of negative replies.