Dalmuir Hill 30th Dec 1850 My dear Mr McLean I cannot tell you how delighted I was to receive your letter today for I have been very anxious to hear of your safe arrival at Hawkes Bay. Papa tells me that he heard of a vessel going there tomorrow so I shall sit up to answer your letter as I am afraid I will not have time in the morning. I have got no news to give except that the Governor has returned and has taken Mr Robert's house for three months. I have not gone out much since you left as the weather is too warm to walk during the day and in the evening I would rather stay at home and read. I often go after dinner to the seat on the hill with a book. There have been no parties lately. We are invited to a dance at Government House tomorrow evening but I am afraid I shall not be able to go as I have had a severe cold and although I am better I am still very weak. I think I got the cold the day before Christmas. I had been in the kitchen doing something which made me warm and to cool myself I went like a silly girl and sat down on the grass however if I feel better tomorrow I must go. I did not spend a very happy Christmas. I was not in good spirits, we had only Mr & Mrs Kirton at dinner. Mr Hargreaves and Miss Redish came up in the evening. This is the second Christmas I have been disappointed in not having you with me. Surely you will not leave next year. If you do I shall not forgive you and I shall be very cross. I have not been quite so well since you left. I do not know what is the matter with me. I am sometimes in very low spirits but I am sure dear you will cure all this when you come back. I am always much better when you are with me. I am perhaps wrong to tell you this as it might make you uneasy but you told me that I should conceal nothing from you. Miss Taylor came to see me a short time ago. She told me that her father has had a fall from his horse which has hurt him very much. She is going back to Wanganui in a few days in the 'Governor Grey' as Mr Taylor is not able to come down for her. I like Miss Taylor very much. She is such a nice quiet girl. I thought I had told you that our trip had been given up as Papa found it inconvenient to go at the time and after his business was over we thought that it was much too warm for us to attempt it. I am sorry we did not go for I am sure it would have done Mama good and I would have been much the better of it as I hope that nothing will detain you long at the East Coast for I weary so much to see you again. Do come back dear as soon as you can. I must now conclude as it is late and if I am well enough to go to the party I must rise early in the morning. Good night and believe me Ever your affectionate Susan D Strang