Dalmuir Hill May 10th 1851 My dear Mr McLean The 'Rose' has at last come in by which I received your letter of the 14th April. I expected to have heard from you by yesterday's mail but I suppose you had not arrived when it left Rangitikei. When Papa came home today he told me that it was reported there was a disturbance with the natives at Taranaki. Whenever I heard this the thought came across my mind that most likely you would require to go there to try and settle the dispute before coming into Wellington. I asked Papa what he thought and he said that it was most probable you would be obliged to do so. I trust however that if you must go you will be able to come in here first. I have been looking forward with so much pleasure to the happiness of seeing you soon that it will be a great disappointment if you cannot come but perhaps I am making myself uneasy about what may never happen. When I hear from you I may find that there is no foundation for my fears. Should you however be obliged to go it cannot be helpt. I must submit to the disappointment as patiently as I can. It is annoying this disturbance has happened just now. It is really very strange that since ever we have been engaged first one thing and then another occurs to keep you away from me. I hope however if we are spared that we will have many years of happiness before us and all this will then be forgotten. The report which you heard about me not looking well is quite true for I was very unwell for some time. In writing to you I did not mention it as I was afraid you might feel uneasy about me. It was a severe form of indigestion I had. I suffered a great deal of pain with it. I am much better now. I would have been quite well by this time if I had not gone to that ball of Mrs Kelham's and caught cold. A great many have complained of cold since and I am sure it is no wonder. It was very foolish to have fires in the room all day and then have the windows all open at night. Mama has not been well for some days both yesterday and today she has been confined to bed. I am afraid she is going to have the same complaint that I had. It must be I think something in the weather which causes it. A number of people have had the same kind of illness lately. I had a letter from Mrs Shand a short time ago. I feel very sorry for her. She is so uncomfortably situated. Mr Shand lives almost constantly at the Custom House which is on the other side of the river. For it is generally very rough poor Mrs Shand is therefore almost constantly alone and as she has no neighbours it must be very disagreeable. She says she wishes she was back in Wellington and I think it would be much better if she were for the change does not appear to have been to their advantage. I think I must now dear bid you goodnight. Mama sends her kind regards and in hopes of hearing from you by next mail. Believe me ever to remain your affectionate Susan Douglas Strang