Dalmuir Hill October 5th 1850 My dear Mr McLean Papa and Mama have gone to bed and I shall now sit down to answer your letter by the last mail. I must write a longer letter this time to make up for my two last being so short. Papa tells me that you ask him whether he thinks that you should come to Wellington before going to the East Coast or not. You deserve a scold for not asking my opinion on the subject, had you done so I might have given permission to go there first, but as I have not been consulted I shall insist upon you coming in before going there. Setting joking aside I really wish that you would come in before you go to the East Coast. You say that you will only be away three or four weeks but your movements are sometimes so uncertain it may be longer. Do then dear to please me try to come in. I will not ask you to stay long, even two days would please me. How little did I think when I was dancing at Mrs Fitzherbert's that at that time you were wandering in the bush. It must hurt you to be so much exposed to the cold night air. I am afraid you are often very careless about your health. Do dearest take care of yourself. Remember if anything were to happen to you I would never have a happy day in this life again. It is perhaps wrong in me to say this. I know it is sinful to love anything in this world so much as I love you but I hope it will be forgiven and I trust my affection for you will never make me forget Him who has given me every blessing which I enjoy. We have had beautiful weather this week. It is seldom we have it so fine in this month. I think that in general September and October are the worst months in the year. Mama is very much better. She has gone out two or three times this week. On Thursday she went with Papa to Evan's Bay to see poor Mrs Drummond. I did not think she would have walked so far. I wish Papa would come home often to take her out for she always likes to have him to walk with her. You tell me not to pay any attention to the gossip about us. I assure you I never do. If it is any satisfaction to the people here to talk about us they may do so long as they please. It will never annoy me, on the contrary it is an amusement to hear the different stories they invent. Major Durie dined with us this week. He invited me to spend a short time with Mrs Durie this summer. If you go to the East Coast without coming to see me I think the best way to punish your disobedience would be, when you return to Wellington, to leave you and go and stay a fortnight at Waikanae. You say that I am to have a great deal of work when you return in sewing on buttons. I shall not object to do it for the first time but I warn you that in future unless you are more careful not to tear then off I shall make you learn to sew them on yourself. The brig has at last come down from Auckland but it has not brought the Governor. I have not heard when he is expected. I think I must conclude. I am afraid you will say I have again written a short letter but you must forgive me dear, for it is very late and if I do not go to bed soon I shall not be able to get up early in the morning. Believe me to remain Ever your affectionate Susan Douglas Strang