I may be unnecessarily sensitive as more probably the true cause is that you are too much engaged with public affairs to write private letters. Uncle wrote you by last mail & I by the two former, one of which was for little Douglas. Did it amuse him? I teased Uncle to shew me his letter but he got cross in his way of it and would not. I know he wishes to retain me here as Aunt Helen is by no means better which is a very desirable home if I lay aside in all expectations of going to New Zealand, my education is sufficiently adequate for such a sphere as this or indeed any other I may have the prospect of in this country but not such as to render me useful in the capacity you anticipate. For that I must have ten years longer and if enabled to go where I am desirous of I am sure I shall not disappoint your hopes in that respect [by in by?]