was I should have no excuse and if I were to go I would not enjoy it. I heard a few days ago that you would not be able to return for six months. I hope this is not the case for I can not endure the thought that I shall not see you for so long. I fear you will think I am of a very discontented disposition but I assure you I am not. I would be quite happy and contented in your absence if it were not that I have often a good deal to annoy me and I am sometimes far from being happy. I may be wrong in saying this still I think I should conceal nothing from you. You said when you were here that I ought not to do so. Do not however because I have told you this come in sooner than is inconvenient for you. I should be very sorry if you did. All I wish is that you would tell me in your next letter