THE FIRST BABY.

Star (Christchurch), Issue 7415, 29 May 1902, Page 1

THE FIRST BABY.

The Caller: "A!h, Jtulia, r«n— " Mrs Your-gwife : "Why, how ■do you do — oh, good gracious!" (Abruptly disappears. After five minutes again returns.) The Caller : "Ita afraid I intr " "Intrude, you dear thing? Why, I'm perfectly delighted V (starting). There, I know Ellen never -will rtsmcanber to — — " (Disappears for five minutes more. . Reenters.) . y " You appear so occupied that perhaps "'Sh!" '' I beg your pardon ?" .:"'__! (in painfully repressed -whisper). It's Lucius— foe's gone to sleep. I'm charmed to see you— only please deai'fc speak loud si-foe's so wa_ef id, . Luohis is." "I^Ai^weiir^ ""'a-'- •"'" ■' " "Well? y lndeed 'he is! Everybodysavs such a healthy child never was seen, Weil? Tho idea!" "He's about s;x months old, isn't, he?" "My dear, I'm surprised at you!. Lucius will be seven months __■__» two. weeks. from nest Tuesday morning at five minutes past ei'x precisely. But, really, you'd think him j eight— you ciertainly -would. He's so precocious, Lucius is !" The :<jal_w' concludes to change the «übjecl. "Very cold i;o-day, don't you think?" . "Truly it is. I've not known such weather for ever so long-— not since Lucius yran born.^ But bess 's little 'art, 'c does not mind it — — "■ "How is your husband !"' "Henry? Oh, well enough— why not? I think it's, nearly time for him to come home, but I'm not sure. I'm so occupied with Lucius— r— -' "Someone told me that he's, looking rather 'badly, "and I-r——" ■ "Whoever said that was one of those emvious old maids who know nothing about it. The prettiest little tiling — hair almost an inch long— and when he gets his teeth "What?- Who?" "Why, Lucius, of course!" ' "Isn't it •bo-rri'ble about young Boodle? Accounts found ebort, you know." "Lucius's accounts will never be found short, I promise you. He's going to be a lawyer." "He might succeed his father as- — *■" "A cotton broker? Upon my word! Tha*'s well enough for Henry, but Lucius — oh !" ' ■ ■ • A "What does his father wish?" " Lucius will 'be amply able to arrange his affairs without dictation, ' I fancy. He'll •be 60 self-possessed, Lucius will!" " There's to be a lecture to-morrow evening. Miss Styk. the celebrated authorees, speaks on 'The Higher. Education of WomenX". "What does she know about it? The idea of her venturing to express any views on such a; sru'bject." x "She's generally thought an. authority." "Ah authority! On the higher .education of women ! Why, she hasn't — bless the woman, she hasn't — she hasn't any baby !" The caller, now rafcber at a loss what to say, is relieved by. the*-' arrival of Henry, who enters in a sideldnr, apologising way. Henry (with timid boldness, to caller) : "Ah. how do you do? (Approaches to kiss Mrs Youngwife.) Well, dear, all right, eh ? I'm awfully .glad to- " Mrs Yovrogwife (in the very face of attempted osculation) : " Oh, Henry, do shut that door — haven't you any consideration? | You'll let- a- draught right upstairs upon Lucius. No. don't- slam it — what a man j you are ! Why. you may wake Lucius !" Henry (meekly obeying) : " Whew' ! I'm half frozen!" " | "So you are! Now, be sure you warm j yourself thoroughly before you go near j Lucius — remember! He's so sensitive, Lucius is !" J " And I've got one of my beastly head- i aches." Mrs Youngwife (to caller): "Oh, dear you oan't guess how they worry me ! Suppose he ehou'd transmit them to Lucius — he is so hereditary, Lucius is !"