...Of Many Things

Press, Volume XCIII, Issue 27990, 9 June 1956, Page 8

...Of Many Things

QPRINGBOK (plural springbokken): a species of antelope (Antilope euchore) abounding in South Africa. Named from its habit of springing upward when alarmed or at play. from Cape Dutch springen (to spring) and bok (wild goat).

THE prospect of filling in his income tax form was just beginning to worry The Walrus when he read of tne anonymous Englishman, chronicled in the “New Statesman and Nation.’ who. having received an income tax assessment, sent it back with a grateful note, saying that although the scheme might have its advantages he had decided not to join.

AIUNICIPAL nut trees for beauty and profit have been suggested by the New Zealand Vegetarian Society. Naturally the society would favour civic nuts, but the Christchurch City Council might consider the idea. Thimc of the benefits to ratepayers and councillors. Windfall walnuts and almonds for the alert ratepayer who gets to the trees before the reserves department, almond icing for a council Christmas cake, walnut cake and almond macaroons at suppO - after council meetings. And most pleasing prospect of all—the Mayor and Councillor Howard gathering nuts in May.

4 South African says that apart from A the size of the Springboks, good manners demand that those of Dutch extraction should be called Afrikaners and not Afrikanders. The Afrikander is a South African breed of cattle.

r pHE Government has called a spade a spade, and in no less a place than the Noxious Weeds Act Extension Order. 1956. This Order-in-Counci! solemnly gazetted, adds to the list of plants which may be declared noxious weeds a disagreeably strong-scented and acrid weed of the aster family, common by roadsides. The dictionary calls it mayweed; the Order-in-Council says firmly it is stinking mayweed.

fYNE St. Bede’s boy who had a pre- ” view of what then purported to be the All Blacks when they practised on the back grounds at the college on Monday morning had his Rugby ardour temporarily damped. He was sitting on a makeshift “grandstand.” an old fence over a creek, when the planking broke and. still with his eye firmly fixed on Jarden, he fell in with a loud splash.

TUST back from China, Dr. Roger ** Duff says the town of Hanchow is pronounced Hanjo. And Prime Minister Chou En-lai? Plain Joe, of course.

/CONTRIBUTORS to “Beaded Wheels,” a New Zealand magazine for the veteran and vintage motorist, venerate the antique. So extreme is their veneration that anything on four wheels less than 20 years old has been classified under the disparaging abbreviation of A.M.O. (Awful Modern Object) But the under twenties now have a defender who has addressed a long and earnest plea for the A.M.O. in a letter to the editor.

QLIGHTLY nettled by the publicity given Jast -week to hter football in-rf nocence,' ' the newspaperman’s wife wishes to tell the Rugby writer that she does know who Pat Vincent is. The Rugby writer now knows about Scarlatti. What he does not know is that there were two Scarlattis—neither of them wrestlers.

J7EING interested in fish. The Walrus has found one touch of imagination in the New Zealand honours list. It is the award of the M.B.E. to a storekeeper in a small, back-country township. Anglers who fish the Southland streams, and hundreds of visitors from all parts of the world who have come to the Mossburn district to fish and shoot, know Gordon Macauley as angler, sportsman, humourist, author, and institution. Many have attempted to read his book. “What I Know About Fishing,” and have found every page blank. Many also know his fisning home on the road to Te Anau. On it is painted a large fish with the legend “So Big.” The man who opens the door to every knock unless he is fishing his favourite Oreti has been guide, philosopher, and friend to all who come there.

HPHE warmest headgear at the military parade on the Queen’s Birthday was worn by the Mayor. His furred tricorne was the envy of the small boys who have been pestering mothers to buy Davey Crockett caps. If the Mavor’s expression was any guide, he would like to hand this piece of the council’s assets in to the nearest Davey Crockett trading post.

/YUTSIDE Lancaster Park on Wednesday afternoon, as traffic was moving off, there was a loud report (it was a car backfiring). “One of the New Zealand selectors, no doubt," said a Rugby enthusiast boarding the bus.

JJERHAPS local body amalgamation has advantages. Because of the Queen s Birthday the rubbish collection day was changed in Christchurch. The County Clerks of Waimairi and Paparua gave public notice of “rubbish collection" and “refuse removal” respectively. But th > Town Clerk had something better to offer—“dust and refuse collection.”

A LTHOUGH the Soviet Foreign Minister has “resigned.” his name will be remembered by the Molotov cocktail of World War 11. Not many politicians have their names thus become part of the language. In the New Zealand Army veterans still refer to their boots as “Bill Masseys.’’ But housewives who order Holland blinds are reminded that the copyright of that adjective did not belong to New Zealand at first.

T>ESTAURANT patrons who like oysters have complained in past seasons of receiving more potato chips than oysters on their plates. This season the high price of potatoes has produced a different complaint. In two of our better-known restaurants on different days of the week oysters outnumbered chips on one man’s plate.

TNCIDENTAL intelligence. Dolls In A Christchurch don’t always wear real hair. Science helps them with wigs of rayon or nylon.

/CRICKET and music lovers both had cause to shudder if they listened to a radio quiz show this week. “With what sport do you associate Sir Pelham Warner?” was the question. “Music” came the prompt answer from the North Canterbury entrant

■yiTHAT will Dame Hilda Ross say ’ ’ when she learns that the New Zealand Antarctic Expedition’s nine huts —and the glasshouse—will have Venetian blinds? This week she objected to everyone thinking that they needed wall-to-wall carpeting, a refrigerator, a washing machine, and Venetians as soon as they were married. At least Sir Edmund Hillary will be able to assure her his party’s blinds are not on time payment.

“AT Last A United Nations—Ceylon Admitted.” The banner headline on the front page of the Ceylon “Observer” which told the world of Ceylon’s admission to the United Nations.

yVARDERS’ in Britain have declared ’’ that gaols' are "universities for crime.” No-one in New Zealand yet uses the degree P.A. (Paparua Alumnus).

r PHE Springboks have arrived. What A are we going to talk about when they have left? —The Walrus