DISCOURSE ON CLEANLINESS.

Auckland Star, Volume XXXVIII, Issue 255, 25 October 1907, Page 5

DISCOURSE ON CLEANLINESS.

FROM WORDS TO DEEDS. OLIVER GROWS DANGEROUS. Samuel Edward Oliver pleaded not guilty this morning to Mr Dyer, S.M., when charged, on remand, with assaulting a young man named Joseph Ball on Sunday, October 21. Ball, who entered the Court with one hand in bandages, aa the result of a wound which penetrated the base of the thumb, explained that he was listening to a discourse by Mr Richardson on the evening in question, when Oliver began aa opposition speech, taking for his subject, "Beer and Apples." At first the crowd cheered, but soon they began to push, and witness, who was in the vicinity of the orator, was hustled up against him. Oliver became bellicose, and flourished a heavy-looking bamboo, and then he (Ball) trippca and fell down, and, as he was rising, Oliver threatened him with i.ie stick, and then, as witness did not get away, not being able to do so, Oliver pulled a long steel from tho handle of the stick and lunged at him. Witness put up his hand as a shield, and the point of the weapon pierced the ball of his thumb. Oliver: You say you could not get away from the crowd. How came you to knock mc and run the spear through my linger? —I did nothing of the sort. The lethal weapon in question was a villainous-looking bamboo implement, attachea to the handle being a long pointed dagger, manufactured from an old gum spear, while a heavy wrapping of lead, for about six inches at the top end, contributed to its general effect of wickedness. Isn't it a fact that you were tantalising mc all the evening?—No, I was not. Anil what brougnt you over tc my meeting at all?—well, 1 was going up the street, and heard a lot of people 6inging out "Jaooray!" To the Bench: "'I went across, and heard him (indicating Oliver) calling out that every loaf of bread that went into .. i oven, had alcoholic poison in it." (Laughter.) His Worship: "Oh! Is that what he said?"— Yes, and that every apple that grew on the tree and every potato was the same. (More laughter.) Oliver: And what did you say I —l said "Hooray!" Oliver: Now, tell the truth! Is it not a fact that you tried to grab my stick wnen 1 went to pick it up? —No. "Now, tell the truth," repeated tho owner of the stick impressively. If You wanted to get that stick, but you didn't think it was so sharp, eh?— What did I want with the stick? "And did not a man knock you down, and you fainted?" —No. The eccentric in the dock began to rattle olf a succession of other queries, but was pulled up by the Court with a caution against putting senseless questions, so he reserved lire for the next witness.

He remained quiet, however, while Dr. Grant explained that the wound was not a serious one, but might have been so had the instrument been rusty; nor did he more than ask Constable Morris wnether the crowd was not "pretty excited," which the constable found, no difficulty in answering to his satisfaction.

Then Oliver's own turn came. "You Worship, on Sunday night I went to the meeting. Found Mr Richardson holding forth re alcohol, as usual. 1 put in a word, and he said, 'Get out of here; go wown the street,' and I goes down the street, and started an opposition meeting. Well, lam not a prohibitionist, so 1 took for my text, 'Cleanliness is next to Godliness,' and I gave them some of my experience here in Auckland. By and by Mr Richardson got sick of it, and his crowd got mixed with mine. This did not agree with him, and some of his lot— I suppose this young man was one of his satellites —began to take a prominent part in tne show. He shoved at mc, and the stick was knocked out of my hand, and when I picked it up I got my finger scratched. I showed it to the sergeant. Well, 1 got away, and then they asked mc if the stick had a pistol in it. I said, 'No, no pistol, and I offered to sell it to the constable for half-a-crown. I made that stick, your Worship. It was made by mc, and expressly for that meeting," and Oliver gazed round the Court with proper pride at his handiwork. He closed his talc by remarking that when a policeman sort of stoppc the crowd, he got clean away. "As a matter , of fact, sir, that boy wae thrown on to mc," he concluded. "It was a pure accident. If 1 had wanted to stab him I could have killed him in a second." And Oliver blew out his whiskers, and looked particularly fierce.

Mr Dyer impressed upon the propounder of "cleanliness" the fact that he had already been recently fined for threatening behaviour, and bound over to the peace. "You have gone far enough, Oliver, and you have now got to the end of your tether," remarked the Magistrate. "On the charge of assault I shall convict you, and sentence you to two months' imprisonment, and shall also order you to find sureties to keep the peace for six months when you come out, yourself in £50 and one surety of £25."

Oliver: "I shall appeal against your derision, sir."

"Very well, Oliver, that will do," and the culprit was inarched out to his two months' retirement.