THE MALICIOUS WITNESS.

New Zealand Illustrated Sporting & Dramatic Review, Issue 1441, 6 December 1917, Page 31 (Supplement)

THE MALICIOUS WITNESS.

Mrs. Bing, a thin, wiry old lady, took the stand in an assault case against one Josh Bang. The lawyer began: “Now, madam, you will please give your evidence in as few words as possible. You know the defendant?” “Know who?” “The defendant, Mr. Joshua Bang.” “Josh Bang! I reckon I do know him, and I don’t know nothin’ to his credit, nuther. Why ” “Please answer yes or no to my questions.” “What questions?” “Do you know Mr. Joshua Bang?” “You ask Josh Bang if I know him! Ask him if he knows anything about tryin’ to cheat a pore lone widder like me out of a three-year-old cow. Ask ” “Now, madam ” “Ask Josh Bang’s wife about that thar brick she put in a batch o’ butter she sold last summer. Ask ” “These matters, madam, have nothing to do with ” “Ask Josh Bang about lettin’ his old mother die in the almshouse. Ask MehitabT Bang about the time she was caught in a neighbour’s field milkin’ four cows on the sly. Ask ” “Really, madam, do you know anything about this case or do you not?” “No, I don’t know nothin’ about it, but I’ve had it in for them Bangs for the last 37 years, and I got myself called as a witness so as to get even. I guess I’ve done it, too. Good afternoon, sir.”