FLOTSAM AND JETSAM

Ladies' Mirror, Volume 3, Issue 2, 1 August 1924, Page 18

FLOTSAM AND JETSAM

COLLECTED FROM VARIOUS SOURCES

Sayings of the Month PATIENCE is the virtue we expect our creditors to possess. o o o I don’t take my law from Mrs. Beeton. Judge Earington. 0 0 0 Our grandchildren will learn less and would probably not think at all. Mr. Hilaire Belloc. o o o If England were a horse I should buy a pair of — Mr. Stephen Graham. o o o The nations of Europe are sunk in pits of stale and unventilated history. —Mr. H. G. Wells. o o o The word 1 1 Pairplay ’ ’ represents in my judgment the greatest contribution which the English-speaking world has made to human progress. Lloyd George. o o o If we once have a Labour Government I do not believe we can ever pull round again; it will be the end of everything. — Mrs. Arthur Webster. Is it the end? o o o Never had there been such a commotion in the little home, and the most wildly excited person was the sister of the young mother who had just presented twins to her husband. Oft' she rushed to tne post office for stamps to spread the great tidings abroad. “Stamps, please,” she said, as she flung down her money. “How many, Miss?” asked the clerk. “Two,” she cried joyfully. “What kind?” “A boy and a girl.”

As a liter a 1 translation, the version given of the Japanese rules for the guidance of motoring tourists is no dou b t accurate, writes a correspoiid en t. The final sentence, ‘•Thank you honourably,” bears the stamp of authenticity, for the Japanese police are easily the most polite force in the world. There lingers in my memory a pleasant example of this. A party of Englishmen were watching a matsuri, or river carval, at Osaka and, with the usual contempt for authority of the Briton abroad, took their stand beyond the rope barrier which had been erected to keep people off the bridges. The police would have been justified in taking strong measures. "What they actually did was to untie the rope on one side and pass it in front of the offending foreigners with an apology, in which our honourable persons were mentioned more than once, for taking this course.

Cigarettes are nasty things. Yon take to a pipe and stick to it. — Baldwin. 0 0 0 There is no such thing as old or new poetry; there is only poetry. — Mr. Edward Gosse. o o o Tobacco has its right and proper place, but not in business hours. — Lord Leverhulme.

"When a lady was charged with shop-lifting at Blackpool, a solicitor inquired whether she read' poetry. “Yes,” was the reply. “1 read it all day long.” What particular poets do you read? —Cowper and Shelley. Do you read any old philosophers? —Yes, Plato and Aristotle. And sc no doubt she picked up bad habits from that convicted criminal, Socrates. But it was a novel and interesting line of cross-examination. I do not think the legal gentleman possesses any great height of brow, but he should get on in Parliament, o o o “Joy Cometh in the Morning,” says a contemporary writer. Yes. Providing you haven’t been making a night of it.