NO MAN ABOUT THE HOUSE

Waikato Times, Volume 127, Issue 21203, 28 August 1940, Page 10

NO MAN ABOUT THE HOUSE

WHAT DO YOU DO WITH YOUR NEW FREEDOM

THOUSANDS of married women in this country have suddenly found themselves endowed, through the war, with a new bewildering freedom from their ordinary domestic ties, which might last for months or even years. All at once it didn’t matter in the slightest if we overslept half-an-hour or so, because there was no one any more who had to be at work by nine; the planning of the evening meal resolved itself into a vague : “I’ll have an egg; there’s some bread and cheese in the place anyway . . .” and one’s full, regulated life became merely a kind of dazed chaotic limbo. For not even the most beloved child can fill the emptiness in the home created by the absence of a husband. Even women with large families are deeply and unceasingly aware of that vacant chair at the head of the table and of the old pipe on the mantelpiece which before September 3 they vowed to fling secretively into the dustbin, but which has since become a treasure. And because of that empty chair and the unlit pipe, there is suddenly so much time on our hands in which to do what we like. It isn’t necessary any longer to put away the sewing machine at any given time in the evening, because only one out of twenty men can tolerate seeing their wives working once their own business day is over; we don't have to rush away from a party or come out of the movies before the end of the show because a hungry man expects his dinner on the table at a certain hour; we can invite our own family to the house, to our heart’s content, without having to think out excuses as to why it is so long since his mother has been asked to Sunday lunch. In short, we are free—just as free as the spinster girl-friend whom we have all envied a little because she can run her life with such glorious independence! Make Use of This Wartime Freedom What then are we married women doing with this war-time freedom of ours ? My own sad experience is that, unless you take a firm, quick hold on yourself, you don’t do anything at all. For instance, I realised, after the first six weeks of the war, that, with all the hours of the day to work in, I had never before achieved such a miserably small output. Free as I was to accept any invitations without first consulting my husband, I found myself drifting into a state of perpetual social prevarication. Yes, I would love to come to dinner .. . some day; I thought I would be in on such of such an afternoon, but might I ring up later just to make sure ? And so on and so fort.i. This is all wrong. Life, even in its grimmest periods, is too precious to waste. And, after all, there are some advantages in this freedom which has been thrust upon us. For example, you must all, like myself, have some special woman-friend whose very name brought a torrent of abuse upon the heads of all womenkind from your husband. This is the time to have her round to supper. These are the days in which we can indulge our sentimental passion for Shirley Temple’s dimples and weep and smile pleasantly through those films of hers to which no self-respecting man accompanies us without heated protest! Remember all those things you had to eat because he liked them so much and be grateful that at least you don’t have to pretend a fondness for steak and kidney pudding until he gets back again. “This is One Day Nearer Peace” I know how easy it is to keep repairing make-up when one gets in to face a lonely evening, and what does it matter if you do sit around in bedroom slippers when there is no one to see you doing it ? But he rhight come home unexpectedly (that has happened to me!) and when you see how smartly his buttons are polished, and the shine a soldier manages to get on a pair of Army boots, your unpowdered nose and slovenly footwear will make you feel ashamed. Perhaps some of us were a little too complacent in those easygoing days before the war; we took so much for granted. It is hard to believe now that one really went into petulant tantrums when the overworked business man couldn’t get away from the office in the middle of the morning to give his advice on some domestic purchase. So if we do glance longingly backwards sometimes at a happiness which was never fully appreciated until it became the past, let us use some of the long, lonely hours of our unasked-for freedom in ■ building up our resolution to recognise and be thankful for the blessings which still come our way. Even the dullest, most wearisome and emptiest day can be exciting when one remembers “This is one day nearer to Peace.”