ODDS AND ENDS

Waipukurau Press, Volume XXVIII, Issue 121, 17 May 1932, Page 7

ODDS AND ENDS

Both Grave and Gay

j Passed by “The Censor.’’ | g»l ■■ II r» H ■■■ L u II ■■ II I— II — n ♦*« First Burglar: Gosh! We’ve broken into the house of the new heavyweight champion. Let’s clear out at once! Second burglar: Don’t be afraid. He won’t fight for less than a purse of £lOOO.

“I saw two rabbits sitting near the Bank of New Zealand the other evening,” said a member of the Rabbit Board on Saturday. “One went into the Plunket Building,” said another member amidst laughter.— “Hunterville Express.

You have all heard of the man who through economic necessity makes his own beer and grows his own tobacco, but have you heard this one. A local young lady who is addicted to the use of the fragrant weed has commenced rolling her own! She says it saves her quite a deal in smoking. It takes so long to roll one that she does not smoke so many we suppose. NeedlessJ;o say she bears a good old Scottish name. *

“I’m a hard-working man, but 1 will not go into the camps. On principle I would rather work for a farmer for three meals a day than go into the single men camps. I have walked from Gisborne. When I left I had £5l but I have used most of it feeding swaggers on the way. I’m an Irishman and am proud of it.” So said a man about six feet high, and strong and capable looking, who called at the Hunterville Express Office to enquire about a ride southward. “1 have the money to pay for the ride,” he continued, but as he met a Scot he was assured that he. was welcome to the ride for nothing.

“There are now over eleven hundred railway stations along the lines of this country, or an average of one for every three miles of track,” states the “New Zealand Railways Magazine.” Of these, nearly three hundred are officered, so that information about railway services, as well as assistance in arranging transport, is easily available to all. The “Magazine” also states that the greater part of capital spent in railway building was invested at a time when the projectors could count upon securing the great bulk of available traffic. People who use transport should remember that before they divert their traffic, to the dangei’ of the railway organisation in their'district.

“I think the cow cockies are a nuisance,” commented Mr W. K. M’Alpine, the North Canterbury delegate to a conference of Rugby subunions recently, when the question of arranging fixtures for the Delargey Challenge Shield was under discussion. Mr. H. Saundercock (Hurunui) appealed for the postponement of challenges until well on in the season in order to give his union an opportunity to foster club football.' “After all we have the cows coming in,” commented another delegate in advancing a plea for an early fixture. This observation prompted Mr M’Alpine’s remark, which greatly amused the various delegates. “Country football is all over after National Week,” said another delegate.