Sketcher.

Wairarapa Standard, Volume XX, Issue 2087, 1 July 1887, Page 2 (Supplement)

Sketcher.

Mr. and Mrs. Bowser. Bv Mm. Bowses. One evening jn*t before our marriage Mr. Bowser said to me; “ l shall make yon a weakly allowance of cash, and tba money with be ohaolntely yours. The idea of a wife having to beg money of her husband strikes mo with pain and disgust. Half of what he owns belongs to her, anyway, and yet some hnsbands make their wives account for the pennies as much as if they were errand beys. 1 shall give you £2 per week, and you can either spend or save it.” The first four weeks after marriage we were off on our bridal tour, and I was too happy to think of sneb base stuff as cash. It was all of seven weeks before I made out and playfully presented to Mrs. Bowser the following little bill. Mr. Bowser to Mrs. Bowser, Dr. To seven weeks’ stipend at £2 per week,... <l4. Received payment. “ What’s this!” demanded Mr. Bowser, as he received it in a very formal manner. "My little bill. Ton were to allow me £2 per week, yon know,”, “ For what t" “ So that I would not have to ask yon for money.” “Urn I What’s to prevent yon from asking ter money when yon need itf' 11 Bat you proposed this method,” “ I did eh ? I hsve no recollection of any such proposal. If yon want ill per week as pin money 1 hare no objection, however, to making it a regular thing.” “ It would be very nice.” “ T-e s. Well, I'll begin on Saturday to give you twelve shillings." " Twelve shillings I" " Or, if that is too much, we'll say eight shillings. Tes, that is about the figure. Tooll want a portion of it to buy pins, needles, gloves, handkerchiefs, thread, buttons, laces, and so on, and the rest you can spend for candy and streetcar tickets. Don’t be reckless, Mrs. Bowser. While I haven’t a stingy hair in my head, I don’t like to see money wasted." The next Saturday he banded me eight shillings, and the next only six. On the third Saturday the stipend was reduced to five, and I hesitated about accepting it. ” Ton may need this before the week is out," I observed, “Well—yes—ahem—l may'' and if you don’t care about it, 111 keep it. 1 suppose you have a pound or so laid by anyhow.” That was the last of my stipend. In the coarse of two or three weeks I wanted a few little knick knacks, and as Mr. Bowser seemed in unusually good spirits I asked him ter £2. "Two pounds I” he fairly shouted, while the color fled from bis face in an instant. “Two pounds, my desr.” “Mrs. Bowser, have yon gone cmy? Are you talking in your sleep? Do you really mean to ask me for £2 V “ Why, certainly." “ Well, yon won’t get it I Tour very demand is the best proof in the world that yon don't know the value ef money.” He finally fished np five shillings in pennies and half pennies, and banded .me the sum, with the remark :

“ Now make that go u far as possible, for it may be a month before I can spare any more.” I think it wu, and two or three weeks longer. Half of what Mr. Bowser has belongs to me, but only in theory. He carries the cash, and I carry the theory. The first “ spat” we ever had grew out of this Theory v. Cub subject. We had some company in the evening, and all of a sadden Mr. Bowser turned to me with :

“ -Say, dear, I promised Blank you would be down to the opening to-morrow. Perhaps you’ll want to plan to go down with these ladies, and so excuse time and place and take this,” With that he threw me a roll of notes amounting to £3O, but the [last ono of our company "had not cleared jthe front steps when he held oat his band and said ; “ That money, Mrs. Bowser.” “ Wbat about that money ?” “ Why, I want it.” “ But you gave it to me.” “ You hand me back that money 1” “ Then I can’t go to the opening.” “ Opening be hanged I You don't suppose I’m fool enough to encourage you to throw away a small fortune on senseless gewgaws, do you ?” 1 had to give it up, but I think bis conscience troubled him. I think so, because next morning he said : “ Mrs. Bowser, it costa mean average £4 per week to set our table. Suppose you take £5 pay the girl, do the buying, and have wbat you can save ?” 1 agreed to it, and when Saturday came I made my start. The first week I saved twenty shillings, and the next sixteen, but when the third Saturday came Mr. Bowser handed me only £4, “How's this?” I queried. “ Mrs. Bowser, we are living altogether too high, and the doctor has warned me that gout is not far off. You must take £4 per week after this, and you ought to lay away at least ten shillings per week oat of that towards buying the winter's coal.” “I won't touch it!”

" Oh ! you won’t f Very well, Mrs. Bowser —very well ? If that’s the kind of help-meet yon are I’m glad to have discovered it thus early in onr career, and I shall take measures to prevent your reekless extravagance from bringing us to ruin."

And one day when I found a penny which had shaken out of bis trousers in the bedroom. and he found it on the bureau where I had laid it, he grabbed for it with the exclamation.

'• There’s another specimen of your financial recklessness? How easy for a burglar to have sneaked in here and taken every cent of it I Mrs. Bowser, you seem determined to ruin me I”