Miscellaneous.

Wairarapa Standard, Volume XX, Issue 2058, 22 April 1887, Page 2 (Supplement)

Miscellaneous.

“ Woob Strauss ’ and Ills Mother In-Law.

Dherc vas many qveer dings, in dis land of der free, I in tier could qvile understand ; Dcr bcoplcs dhey all seem so deefront (o me As dhosc in mini? own fadcrlnnd. Dhey frets blenty droublcs, and indo mishaps, Mifoudt der least bit of a cause : Und. vcmld you polief id.' dhosc mean Yankee chaps, Dhey fights mit dheir moder-in laws 1 Shust dink of a rite man so vicked as dot ! Vhy not gife der ohit truly a show Mho vas it gets oup. ven dcr nighdl it vas hot, Mit mine baby, I shust like to know L’nd den in dcr vintcr vhen Katrine vas sick, Und der mornings vas shnowy und raw, Who made righdl avay oup dot lire so qvick? Vhy, dot vas mine modcr-iu-law. Id vas von of dhosc voman's righdt vcllcre. I boon, Dhcre vas nodings dot’s mean aboudt me ; Ven dcr oldt lady fishes to run dotmashecn, Vhy, I shust let her run id, you sec. E nd vhen dot shly Y’aweob vas cutting some d ricks (A block of her oldt chip he vas, yaw !) Ecf she goes for dot chip like some dousands of bricks, Dot's all righdt j She's mine modcriulaw. Vcek oudl and veek in, id vas alvays der same, Dot voraan vas boss of dcr house ; Budt, dhen, neft'er mindtl I vos glad dot she came, She vas kind to mine young Vawcob Strauss, Und vhen dhcre vas valor to gel vrom dcr spring Und firevood to sphlit oup und saw She vas vclcome to do it. Dhcre's not onyding Dot's too good for mine modcr-in-law.

Telegraphing from Moving Trains The Council llluff Division of the Chicago, Milwaukee and St. Paul Railroad has been equipped with the Edison-dilliland-Smith system of telegraphing between moving train stations. This system consists of placing telegraphic instruments on one ear of each train and the use by induction of the ordinary telegraph wire at the. side of the track, without interfering with the regular traffic over the wires. l!y this method all possibility of collisions is done away with, as each train is in constant, communication with the stations each side of it.. The value of this invention asa preventative of eoliisions on single track roads cannot he overestimated. With it in use a train may start out for .Toff mile run and report every inch of its progress to the dispatcher without stopping-. M’e are yet young as to what can he accomplished by the induction system of telegraphy, hut this device reduces the chances of injury by collision on a railroad almost to a cipher. A great future appears to lie before it.

A Significant Motto- -One if the earliest coins in tin; United States bore tlie inscription “ Mind Your Own liusiticss,” and we doubt if any other dictum or maxim was ever put into such active circulation or brought nearer the consciences of such a number of people. The placing of such a phrase in such a place was a stroke of genius on the part of its originator, whether that were Dr. Franklin, as it is thought, or not; for it served not only ns a perpetual, hut a friendly admonition, even a welcome one, in view of its medium, to many people in danger o; forgetting it, and preached its little sermon at every transaction where the coins changed hands, at every jingle in the pocket, at every thought of the wherewithal for daily needs. And what lay sermon is more needed than this brief admonition' What is there that we are, one and all, more likely to forget for want of practice, and of which we may inherit the forgetfulness?

A story told by the St. Petersburg correspondent of the II "unrr AH/irmeinr /.titumj bears witness to the diplomatic genius of the C/ar—at all events, in difficult domestic problems. A short time ago the Czarina appeared in a new maize colored toilette, the. fashion of which called forth the universal admiration of the Court ladies. A few minutes later the young Keodorolfna Ghika was announced. As she came forward to kiss the hands at the Empress it was seen that her dress was the exact counterpart of that of the imperial lady. The Czarina reddened indignantly ; the young lady turned pale with fear as she saw the awkward mistake made by the Parisian house from which she had received the new costume. The Czar got rid of the painful situation by a happy jest. “ I and my lieutenants,” said he " also wear exactly similar uniforms.”

What is it to Thee ? "’Twas a Winter day, and white with new .snow ; 1 saw alilllemaid past the, window go, With a bright, bright hood, and a face fair to see— Hut what was it to me ? Kor I was a boy that looked through the glass, And nodded to see (he little maid pass, With the scarlet hood amt fringe of fur— Hut what was it to her? 'Tis Winter; the white snow is new again : I stand with a woman and look through the pane ; Mayhap like the sweet hooded maid is she— Hut what is it to thee?

Odessa and St. Petersburg papers publish a singular document whieli is nothing less than a formal treaty between one Ljasjkevieh, the manager of an estate in (he government of Kiev, and a neighboring peasant woman who passed for a very powerful witch. He greatly feared a blight for his crop of beetroot, and for the honorarium of eighteen roubles she undertook lo war 1 oIT the danger by her magical spell*, after May ”1. Should the blight re-appear, she was to be bound to repeat the incantations gratis. One portion of the enchantment consisted in the. witch’s walking over the endangered fields at night in a costume, the ineagivness of which may bo more easily imagined than described.

Too Many Dogs Spoil the Coat-—The instinct of Newfoundland dogs to save a drowning person lias been somewhat pain fully tested by an unlucky Kicucbman. He was walking in the country with a friend, who possessed a magnificent Newfoundland, and incautiously iptcstioncd the truth of the animal’s sagacity. The dog's master, vexed at the slur cast upon his favourite, gave his friend a push, and knocked him into a shallow river. Turk immediately sprang in. and, seizing one of the tails of the immersed man's coal, commenced to swim for land. I’nfortunately, another Newfoundland, trotting on the "other side of the river, saw the affair, and also came to the rescue. 1 1 'g number two immediately seized the other tail of the coat, and wished to swim back to his master. Turk held fast and stnigeled for his side, and the owner of the coat cried in vain for help. At last the coat, gave way. and each dog swam proudly home with a piece of cloth in his mouth, so that Turk’s master was forced to plunge in to save Ins friend.

Pastor: bn 1 says again, hnJJonu, put not your trust in kings I St ill a mall roi co in comjccijal tan : bight yo is, chile, right yo is. Aces is betlah. hi ciat’s do reason I’sc come ter alui'rli wivout no obercoat dis mawnm’,’’