Brief Mention.

Waipawa Mail, Volume XVIII, Issue 3104, 26 July 1894, Page 3

Brief Mention.

Th.; Maori chief To Whiti is dangorously ill from influenza at Parihaka. A protty woman always prefers to walk about with a plain one. A man in ifolborn Union, aged 75, has beon married seven times. The Victorian Government are reducing tho salaries of oil civil servants. For participating in the Kosciusko centennial celebration 200 Poles of Warsaw, have beon sent to Siberia. At homo u man spoons most of Ilia time wondering whore the woman folks have ‘ hid ’ the thing he wants. An American spinster calls her cat “Thereby'’ for the very obvious reason that from it hangs a tale. A specialist in nervous di eases says that women should sleep nine hours at night and one hour in tho daytime. According to tho Lancet , totrahydroparumenthyloxN’chino'dno will euro cancer —also earthquakes, wo should imagine. A man can make himself decidedly unpleasant by insisting on reminding tis of what we thought last year. In Sydney white shirts are being washed, starched, and ironed for 2i per dozen. Being poor is a mere trifl i ; but bein* known to bo poor constitutes a gravo offence. An Australian newspaper man recently spoke of “ tho lifeless corpse of a dead man.’'

The earth’s lowest body of water is tho Caspian Sea, which has beon sinking for centuries. O’Regan says that women are physically incapable of enduring the hardships of political life. Some of the English railways mw supply pillows on hire to night passengers of any class, at a charge of Gd each. ‘ Is your husband sociable, Mrs Faupa ?’ ‘ Yes, indeed ! He’s a regular socialist ; talks all the timo.’ Every dog has his day ; but it is not overy dog that knows when he is having it. It is becoming tho custom in America to plant memorial trees to prominent men and others, inetead of erecting statues. The body of tho late Mr Edmund Yates was cremated, and the same day the ashes of her husband were handed to his widow. When overytbiug cl?o fails, and your insomnia seems to be incurable, try and get a position us night watchman. It’s stupid to waste timo looking back at one’s own mistakes when there is so much fun in watching other poisons. Someone- who believes that ‘ brevity is tho soul of wit ’ writes : ‘ Don’t eat stale Q cumbers. They’ll W up.’ Landlady : “ Have you tried the coffee this morning Mr Lintou ?” Mr Linton : “ Yes, I have, and it has provod an alibi The Rev. Mr Mackintosh, M.A , one of the oldest Presbyterian ministers in New Zealand, died suddenly at Stratford on Saturday. No smile.is ro genuine as that of tho lion which perched on tho fence, watches the man next door making his spring garden. A man has boon arrested in Paris who is said to havo dono an extensive trado in the manufacture and sale of “ rare” postage stamps. A couple have been celebrating the 63rd anniversary of their wedding at Buekbury, tho husband being 88 and the wife 85. It does uot cost much to remember the poor, but you can’t make tho poor remember you without going to some slight expense. Prince Bismarck is the possessor of 482 crosses and decorations, ft v ould require a breast 21ft in width to wear them all at once. A boy’s cm science is that part of him which prompts him to cot all the sweets to keep them from making his little brother ill«

l “ Have you a Contributors’Club here ?” asked tho author. “Wo have ” replied , the weary editor. “ John hit him a clip with that waddy.” When you go in to collect a bill the man at tho counter is less apt to inquire about tho health of your family than whon you go in to pay one. According to the Premier, the Government expect that the treasury chest will have a very severe strain upon it. Mr Saddon did not explain how. The missing steamer Duckenfield, bound from Napier to Sydney, reached lior destination yesterday. She lost her pro pallor, and was hove to for three days. “ Is it really a sign of death if a dog howls dismally at night ?” writes a timorous lady correspondent. Yes, madam, it is very often a Bi'gn of death—to tho dog. A hippomoter, to record the number of a horse’s paces and the distance he has travelled, has been invented by an offioor in tho French army. Card players take warning ! While playing poker, a man ia Oklahoma (U.S.) drew four aces. II o be cam o so excited that ho dropped down dead of heart disease. Mr W. 11. Jones, of Grey, challenges fifteon Hokitika men over fifty years of age to a footba 1 match for the benefit of local hospitals. “ There’s lifo in tho old boys yet.” She : “ Ob, yes. I quite believe there’s a fool in every family. Don’t you?” Ho : “ Well—or—my opinion’s rather biassed. You boo, I’m the only member of our family.” x\ man iu Now Jersey was rescued from drowniug by another, who, in the process of saving him, tore his coat collar. Next day tho rescued ono sued his proßorvcr for assault and battery. A recent invention, if practical, will bring relief to all public speakers. It is £

porous glass for window pauos, ensuring pleasant and healthy ventilation without a draught. What a boon to suffering lecturers!

A curious feature of Japanese journalism is that every impoitant paper is said to have a “ prison editor.” Japan- sa journalists are so constantly being fined and sent to prison that the solo occupation of the individual is lo go to gaol when called upon.

Tho Emperor of China thinks there’s nothing like leather. He bnlieves that the shoemaker shou’d bo liberally patronized, aud gives an example by ordering 200 pairs of boots at once. It would not be a bad idea if our Radical Govern meat imported a dozen Emperors. Tho boot trade would “ bum” again. I don’t want .you to havo so much company,” said the mistress to her cook ; “ j’ou have more callers in a day than 1 have iu a week.” “ Well, mum,” she replied, “ perhaps if you tried to be a little more agreeable you’d havo as many friends as I havo.” “ Remember, witness,” sharply exclaimed tho American lawyer for the defence, “you are on oath!” “There ain’t no danger of my forgettin’ it,” replied the witness, sullenly, “ I’m tolling the truth for nothin’, whon I could have made ton dollars by lyin’ fur your side of tho case, an’ you know it.”