WITHOUT PREJUDICE.

Thames Star, Volume LXIII, Issue 17761, 7 December 1929, Page 5

WITHOUT PREJUDICE.

NOTES BY “CAMEO.”

After reading the Byrd stories you come to the conclusion that all the air in Antarctica isn’t cold.

Commander Byrd Flew to the pole, I’ve heard; He talked about it, Thera are others who have walked about it.

“Let us run over a few things together,’’ said the motor-car instructor to his pupil.

Just when we were getting.our lip reading perfected, along they come with the talkies.

There is absolutely no truth in theassertion that the red rain at Blenheim was an insidious fonfl of communist propaganda.

A description of a missing girl says: —“She wore flesh coloured stockings and had bobbed hijtr.” That ought to make it easy to find her.

Golf halls which squeak when lost have been invented bv a Yorkshire golfer. To meet this menace to one of their chief sources of income, caddies have taken to wearing new boots.

“You must wake and call me early, call me early, mother dear.” That was often said to mothers by the girls of yesteryear! But the girls now tell their maters, as they start out for a spin, > “You must wake up early', mother; someone’s got to let me in.’ 5^ * * # *

A schoolboy, the worry of his teachlife, handed in the following composition on cats:—“Cats that’s meant for little hoys to maul and tease is called Maultese cats. Some cats is reckeraized by how ipiiet their purrs is, and these is named Purrsian cats. The cats what has very bad tempers is called Angorie cats, and oats with deep feelins is called Feline cats. X don’t like cats.” * * » ’■ #' • Lean men and deathmen, $$ Wild men and mild men, Wee men and he-men, \ 7 ; - Rum men and dumb men, • , Tailor men and sailor men, Rail sitters, gas fitters, Golf players, man slayers. Jobbers and robbers Get married. Tall girls and small girls, Big girls and trig girls, Neat girls and sweet girls, Cash girls and rash girls, Bad girls and sad girls, Circus riders, home abiders, Opera singers, hash slingers, Crooks and cooks t Marry them. * * • .*

Two small boys in Invercargill wanted to go to Wirth’s Circus, but they only had a threepenny bit each. So they decided to put them on. Aha railway line and flatten |9hBH|&BB look like sixpenny nately, when the train had passed, there, was no sign of the coins. The boys looked after the train in disgust. “We might have known we’d lose them,” they-said. “That’s' the Dunedin express.”, : , #.* ■ « •

One of the problems agitating the public mind at the moment is just this: If McKenzies lost Hart and Milnes- got Court, what is Farmers’ WoolwoTth? The Keen observer might he rather Caughey in finding the answer. but would Hugh Wright that only a Wiseman knows, you wouldn’t be wrong.—Observer’

Old buildings or monuments that originated later' than 1714 are not regarded as ancient in London. The English have some advantage of us with reference to antiquity. Over here anything is ancient that originated before 1830. In Greece and Italy what’s ancient was before Christ. And everywhere the distinction attempted is Between ancient and just old. • • -v • • *

An article in a contemporary j tells us how to keep young. But with this housing problem the difficulty is to know where to keep them. • * # *

The story of Commander Dalton’s flight says : “The ’plane soon ran out of rain on the'return to Ashburton, which was reached with an almost empty petrol tank.” Wasn’t it thoughtful of him to assist the farmers during the drought? # ’» * *

They’ve discovered a sheep in the Himalayas, that runs forty miles an hour. That’s the kind of lamb you need nowadays' to keep up with Mary.

You can tell a civilised country. Tt’s one where people kill the birds and spend thousands to fight insects.

;■ Now that Santa dans is busy doing his Xmas Bhoppins I have'been asked to suggest thstt be cultivate a little quieter taste in selecting neckties.

After spending a sleepless night, T have arrived at the solution of the territorial problem in the Antarctic. Ownership is claimed by the U.S.A. Let it be forthwith conceded on condition that all American citizens who support the claim are forthwith shipped down to the Antarctic to settle the country. They could then have it by right of continuous occupation.

An author says some people keep on predicting the end 'of the world in spite of the fact that they are always wrong. He must admit, however, that they get a little nearer every jbime.

Tobacco prices have risen in, Australia but it still remains for the consumers to raise the price of a smoke.

In condemning a tailor ■.to death for murdering a soldier by stabbing him, a famous Scottish judge of the ’eighties thus delivered himself: “And not only did you murder him, wherebv he was bereaved of his life, hut you did thrust, .or push, cr pierce, or project, or propel the le-thall weapon through the belly-hand of his regimental breeches, which were his Maiestv’s.”