"From the Dock."

Timaru Herald, Volume XIIC, Issue 13596, 16 May 1908, Page 3 (Supplement)

"From the Dock."

I'RINUXKR'S POETRY AND PROSE.

LAUGHTER IN COUBT,

The sordid gloom of the Clcrkemvell Sessions House, London, was lightened on March 24 by the fantastic ability of George Morley, who in his sixty-one years of life has played many parts—upholsterer, decorator, painter, salesman, linguist, elocutionist, poet, and despoiler of furnished lodgings. Tlie last part brought him to the sessions, where ho pleaded guilty, and in mitigation read a long statement with all the gestures of a- populr actor, and the thunipings on the rail before him of a strenuous orator.

" Sly lord," he began, " I have pleaded guilty because I have no desire to wasle the time of tho court " My lord intervened with the remark: —"That is not a very good reason." " Also because 1 am guilty," Morley continued.

"That, is a very good reason," was my lord's second and last interruption, for Morley warmed to his work, and Mr Wallace, K.C., who presides at these functions, did not get another opening. " And what is> more," i-aid Money, mopping casually into rhyme.

"T hail the hour that finds me heie, Before your Honour, as my judge, And all I say shall be sincere, From truth I will not budge. " The wonder is, sir, that wo have not met at an earlier date, inasmuch as for some time now I have been looking forward to expecting and indeed preparing the way for this present, yet pleasant, legal tableau. " There is, as you know, a French saying, 'Tout vient a qui sait attendre.' (Everything comes to him who waits). I have waited for this hour, and it has come, and I am glad of it, rejoice in it, and have a welcome for it. You know, sir, that providence gives thick liides to animals that must exist in cold climates, and to men that are reserved for sorrow it gives a genuine, jovial spirit. "Indeed, the inner side of the darkest cloud is bright and shining; I therefore •turn my clouds about, And to-day I wear them inside out, That you may see tho lining.

I have to admit that a warning voice Las often whispered in mine ear—'Be careful George, or for the Law Courts you are fated. Then in the newspapers your case 'it will appear, Where legal storie3 are so pithily narrated. " I have done wrong with my eyes open, wilfully and fully alive. ' I have made my own bed, and intend to lie upon it as cheerfully as my age and constitution will permit." "One thing I am anxious to do, and that is to prove that I am not the desperate character, such a dreadful, monstrous criminal, as I am made to appear . . . ~ 'Magna est Veritas, et prevalent,' thus runs the Latin proverb, but, my lord, truth does not always prevail on this side of the grave, only beyond it.. "But now, my lord, I will speak of myself. I will give you the reasons of my conduct, and why I rejoice to be before you. "I have done my utmost to obtain emplorment,. but without success. I have resolved not/ to commit any. dishonest act again, and so I decided to enter the workhouse. I went to the relieving officer, bufc that officious piece of bumbledom (after snapping out a. few questions) roughly informed me that he could do nothing. I came out disappointed, but not conquered. . - " Soon I was totally without food or shelter, and only such raiment left as that in which I stand. On three occasions I sought refuge at the casual wards « . , bub I do nob intend to go there again as long as there is an eai'fch for a> bed and the sky for a counterpane. Well, sir, I resolved to have another hard, earnest- tiy for work, and, if I failed, to take the only course left open for me, namely, to get into gaol. "For if in prison I should land, Both food and work would be at hand, And when released I could command A gratuity for pay. Far preferable to casual wards, Where from the bedcloths and v floorboards Crawling things appear in hordes, And on you find their way. "The historian shows that, notwithstanding the progressive spirit of the times, a Briton is not permitted,' without an effort, to progress according to his own inclinations, and I would add that after a certain age he is- not permitted, with effort, to progress at all. What could I do? Turned away from the workhouse, there was left for me a choice of two things—suicide or prison. It is said of two evils, choose the lesser. I chose prison, where: "I should have food all through the week; On Thursdays broth or mutton or steak, No diggings then should have. to seek, But simply rest content. And will it not be truly grand For me to wear the convict band, And bravely every day to stand ..-—-' My well-earned punishment?

"Then when I am released again, If in mind and body I am sane, No further wrongs mv life shall *tain, On good I will be bent. Once prison brought me scalding tears, An aching heart, appalling fears, But now I ask, sir, for three years, And what I ask is meant. "If you give me three years with good conduct I shall cam 30s, besides having ;t new suit of clothes 1o appear decent in when lam discharged. Then : " With money, new clothing, and a new heart, You see, on my own I can make a> new start, And if some one but gives me a donkey and cart, T.liat donkcv from this oiie no mortal can part." Mr Wallace said that for a man with fcuch gifts and abilities there could be no excuse, and uif he had applied his natural gifts in an honest way ho could always have earned a living. He would have to undergo three years' penal servitude. "Thank you," said Morley, with a smile and a bow, "that's just what I required."