MISCELLANEOUS.

Temuka Leader, Issue 1207, 22 July 1884, Page 3

MISCELLANEOUS.

A fashionable lady, whose position in society haß been but recently attained, in boasting of her new residence, remarked that the windows were all of stained glass, whereupou her honest old mother exclaimed, " Why, that's too b-*d ! It just spoils everything ! But, won't soap an' turpentine take the stains out 1" Legge, Bishop of Oxford, rashly invited a couple of wits—Canning and Frere—to hear the first sermon 'after his appointment. " Well," said he to Canning "how did you like it?" "Why, I thought it rather short." "Oh, yes ; lam aware it was short, but I was afraid of being tedious." "Oh, you were tedious," said Canning. Sir Frederick Thesiger, afterwards Lord Chelmsford, being engaged in the conduct of a case objected to the irregularity of a learned serjeant, who repeatedly put leading questions m examining the witnesses. " [ have a right," maintained the sergeant doggedly, " to deal with my witness as I please." "To that I offer no objection," retorted Sir Frederick ; "you may deal as you like, but you shan't lead." Skinny Men— "Wills' Health Benewer/ restores health and vigor, cures Dyspepsia, Impotenc, Debility. At Druggists. Kemptbonm, Preiser and Co, Agents, Christchnroh. 1 Three ladies were going to a fancy dress ball, one as a Greek lady, the other two as Neapoliton peasants. A gentleman friend called on them a few days before the ball, and finding thev were out, inquired of the servant if she knew the characters the ladies were going in to the ball, to which she replied, "Oh ! sir ; they ain't going with any characters, but Mrs Captain is going as the Greek slave, and the other two ladies is going as metropolitan pheasants." An honest tradesman dies, leaving a number of debts, which his widow is in no hurry to pay. A surviving friend of the deceased remonstrates with her upon her negligence. "What!" he says, indignantly, " you hesitate about paying this money—what about leaving your son an untarnished name !" "Ah, you see," sighs the widow, "my poor dear husband's name was Smith, and there are so many Smiths, that perhaps nobody would ever know." Thh Test of Actual Tbial This it what proven the merit of a preparation, The proprietor of Green's August Flower, knowing its valuable properties, meets this test boldly by preparing samples bottles of this remedy, which tre eold at 6d. This enables ooubtera to try its virtues r.t a tiifliug expanse. August Flower is a panaceafOf for Dyspepsia and all aiso/ders of tho Liver, inoludu g Biliousness, Indigestion, Sick Headache, Otstivenctß, &0., &3. Three dosea will ruhevii auj of the above, and a faithful us.i will certainly cure. Mo modioina in the world has ev«r giren 6uoh proof of its merits. Druggists reoomniend it with perfect confidence atd pbyaioi*n# prescribe it rcgulailj. Piiee for full eiz?a bottles 3a 6d. Sold by all druggists.