GOLFER AND HIS WIFE

Te Aroha News, Volume XLI, Issue 6409, 1 November 1923, Page 5

GOLFER AND HIS WIFE

THE YOUTHFUL AUDIENCE DISAPPOINTED. There was once a golfer who was never tired of describing to his wife the wonderful shots he had made during the day. His wife would listen speechless with admiration, while she prayed silently , that she might learn to deserve the glorious husband that had been granted to her. ; One evening when the golfer had finished telling his wife about his phenomenal tee-shot at the eleventh he noticed on her face an expression of unusual happiness and excitement. He bade her tell him what was moving her. “Did I not recently hear you say, dear,” she replied, “that you had fixed up to play with the pro, tomorrow afternoon at half-past four?’ “That is sp,” answered the golfer. “Then,” said his, wife, “I have a lovely surprise for you. To-morrow I am going to bring the children to the. club to watch you drive from the first tee.” “That would not, I am afraid, be very wise, dear,” said |the golfer, Sitting up suddenly in his chair, “the ground',, is very damp; deay little Annie might catch cold.” “Damp—after all this dry weather, darling?” said his wife incredulously, “I couldn’t possibly disappoint them now, sweetheart. They have been looking forward to it for days.” All the following • morning the golfer’s'face wore a strained, thoughtful expression, but in the afternoon it cleared -suddenly. When his wife and the children arrived,at the club he and the pro. were already at the first tee. He greeted them affectionately, arranged them in a semi-circle behind him, and teedl up his ball. Just, however, as he swung the club to dNve, the pro. fell suddenly on his knees with a loud cry. “A, sir!” he exclaimed, “I pray you, do not strike. On the first green, a bare 400 yards away, 1 I see my poor old father rolling the turf. One of your tremendous drives will, I fear, kill him without fail. It is useless to shout “fore” at this distance; and he may not leave the green until he has finished rolling it, which will be some hours yet.” Hearing this, the golfer, with a superb gesture of renunciation, replaced his club in the bag, while his adoring wife and children crept away in reverent silence. When they had gone the golfer gave the pro. the pound note he had promised him, and, taking out his driver again, topped the ball, as usual, into the bunker 20 yards from the tee. He who relates on the hearth his high deeds on the links should join a club inaccessible to his family.