THE ART OF SMALL TALK.

Sun (Christchurch), Volume IV, Issue 963, 13 March 1917, Page 4

THE ART OF SMALL TALK.

The girl who is a good listener, as she listens catches points in the narrative that she can brin;; up later as startingpoints for further conversation. This | type or talker flatters her listeners by making them feel that they have been intensely interest"! themselves. So if you can't be very amusing, and if-you are not wonderfully magnetic, you can score a social triumph by simply being interested. And that suggests another type —the type of person who always starts the ball rolling along new and interesting lines. This type of person has originality, and she is usually a person of experience. Though she may break many of the rules of conversation, she is still regarded as a social success. Of course, it is usually bad form to talk much about one's self, but this type of person can dwell on her own personal experiences for a long time without seeming in the least rude. Usually it is considered highly ill-bred to discuss at length one's servants.oue's children, or one's clothes, yet this type of woman sometimes does all three at the same time, and does it so interestingly that no one is bored. Next to the egostiscal person, the greatest social uuisaix-e is the <omplainer. This type of woman complains of the weather. For her it is always too hot or too cold. She tells the person to whom she has just been introduced ail the details of the difficulty she had in arriving—the erowded cars, the slippery pavements, the blinding sun, or the drizzly rain. Jf she is a schoolgirl, she grumbles and complains about the difficulty of her lessons. On first acquaintance, she tells you she is homesick, that school rules arc hardships, and that school-cook doesn't make the kind of dessert she likes- Al ways remember that when you complain you admit your own inability to put up with surrounding*;—that you are in one way or another defective. Besides this. you are not being at all interesting, and you are making other -people miserable at the same time. Some women imagine that by complaining they are making others think that they are more sensitive or more refined or more delicate than others. Bi;t nowadays delicacy and over -fastidiousness have gone out of fashion, and our idea of woman hood is summed up in the expression a ' 'good sport."