Shaun's Patch

Southland Times, Issue 22009, 8 May 1933, Page 8

Shaun's Patch

A little nonsense now and then Is relished by the

These seem to be the leak ends. By the time all the currencies are depreciated, people will have become so used to the new values that they will want more depreciations. # ♦ » * A bank is solidest when it has liquid assets. * * And judging by the Democrats naste in legalizing beer, it regards that beverage as a liquid asset. * * ♦ • EDUCATIONAL AIDS. Give a sentence containing the word “target”: . “How can a target practice? ♦ * * * “Youth calls to youth,” the poet says And that makes bosses moan That since it’s true it’s hard to get Through on the office ’phone. * x< * ♦ Remember thaUthe man who can run a big hotel, or a government has to send a simple thing like a fountain pen to a shop for repairs. Xt * * * It has been reported that Russia has lifted the ban on gay neckties. What a chance for the safety razor men! * * * * Oh yes, most of the conversation of the barbers is airy persiflage. * * » » THE INNOCENTS. She thought autographs were used by motor companies to show the rise and fall in sales. A RED SNOOPER. A friend told me he heard there was a Soviet spy in New Zealand—a statement which has moved me to warble melodiously: Of all the jobs I’m sure that I Consider softest for a guy Is working as a Soviet spy. Of course, you know that my opinion Is based upon the Soviet minion Who operates in this dominion. He snoops around on rubbered toes In places where each fellow gees And gathers facts the whole world knows. He sneaks along the public streets Suspecting every one he meets Of betraying him and other feats. And then the useless facts compiled They go to Moscow to be filed — So that’s why at the tale I smiled. * * * * The cable says: The Chinese press reports the death at the age of 256 of Lichingyun, one of the world’s oldest men. He attributed his longevity to his peace of. mind. No one to give him a piece of mind By the way, where are his companions?