Shaun’s Patch

Southland Times, Issue 21089, 22 May 1930, Page 6

Shaun’s Patch

A little nonsense now end then In relished br the wisest men.—Hudlbraa.

Now Invercargill is a city Some folk think a noble darg’ll Be to get a name more pretty Than the present Invercargill. The British lion roars in Wanganui. ♦♦- * * It seems a pity that Southland cannot import a few more footballers, because then the Southlanders who won the Ranfurly Shield could sit in the stand and watch it being defended. EDUCATIONAL AIDS. Give a Sentence with the word “Odessa” in it: “Odessa nice girl.” * * * * Golf’s knickers: Golf snickers. * * * * SUICIDE. A bookseller sells a book on Sales Rcsistence. * * * * UNITED PARTY STAKES. Forbes Alsoransom. Stony men are being sent to Pebbly Hills. FAMOUS TREES. Oak. Kauri. Boot —. Forest. bien. mendous. The Chestnut . » » « » There arc 47 speeches of welcome awaiting Miss Amy Johnson at Port Darwin. Well, I wouldn't blame the girl if she made a forced landing there. * * * * MODERN PROVERBS. Still waters are cheap. ».* * * Walking the planks: Tramping the deck of a liner. A Dance Hall: Fools rush in where husbands fear to tread. * * * * I sometimes think that never blows so red The nose as on some local toiler’s head, Finding this town is designated dry, He tries to irrigate himself instead. * * •# * Some party members speak of the gathering as a cork us. * * t, * * • Umbrellas, it is stated, are 179 years old. I’ve got one of them. * * * Ready reckoners are not , good business. They are usually bought by people who don’t count. ' # # * * To race, to races to back a nice winner. Home again, home again, bank account thinner. * » * * THE CAT. Cedric, my cat, upon the hearth Sits and takes his evening bath. And then, with purrs that ripple deep, He quietly goes off to sleep. Quite often I would like to find What visions flit across his mind. Does he dream of the feline wives Who decorate his nine cat lives? Or is it of a paradise With every corner crammed with mice? Of walls where he may serenade And dodge his hearers’ fusillade? Perhaps that great nocturnal fight That put the next door Tom to flight? I ponder these, until his- purrs Are halted and he slowly stirs, Then certain as the march of doom Stalks purposefully from the room. And, as I watch him rise and go, I know his thoughts I’ll never know.