"MOD PALS"

Poverty Bay Herald, Volume LII, Issue 17158, 7 October 1926, Page 10

"MOD PALS"

DAD AND HIS BOY. COMPANIONSHIP AND CHARACTER, " Make a pal of your boy," was the theme taken by Mr. J. S. Barton, S.M., in an address given at the " Father ind Son " tea at the Y.M.C.A. at .Wanganui. In the course of bis duties as magi*■vate at Wanganui Mr. Barton daily comes 111 contact with juvenile offenders, and a professional career of many years has given him »■ wonderful understanding of the process' of the child mind. So ho dealt', with the relationship of father- and son in. a most interesting manner, his remarks hieing followed with keen attention by parents and ■eliildren alike, and punctuated with applause at frequent intervals. " Make, roo.m in your home for your hoys," said Mr." Barton, speaking- to the fathers.. "Don't let him. feel there is no place for him. I know boys can be very, very "trying"'at times—they can lie very cocksure and l sometimes you might even he. tempted to regard them us a bit of a. nuisance. Make your hoy feel that your home is his home too; that he has a right to regard it as his also, and don't try to choose his friends for' him. Bather, train him to value those ideals and standards thaiwill enable him to choose the right kind of friends himself. Know-where he is and what he is ; doing. . .... ' ..IMS CODE.-OF HONOR. " And there is another ' don't ' .! would like to mention: don't crush his enthusiasms, for the enthusiasms of a boy from fifteen to twenty years form the motive power that will carry him through life. Be glad you see his enthusiasm and welcome it, and turn it into the right direction. Never wound his pride unnecessarily and never make ridicule of bis code of honor. It is a fine thing for boys to have their own code of honor, audi their own code of rules for .settling their disputes. It is a great mistake for parents and school teachers lo think, they can provide a better way of settling the boys' disputes than the boys themselves," "Even in doing what- is tight, one may err," continued Mr Barton. " Going hack to my own younger days, J remember a fried of mine who got in with the wrong set, and used to gather with his comrades at the hack of a -tobacconist's .shop- and gamble there, dodging his studies, losing more money than he could'' afford to lose, and forming had habits. Well, one night bis mother came round: with a whip, rushed into the room, and gave him a sound thrashing, in front of his fellows. Her zeal was good, but I doubt the worth of her method. She disgraced lnm. unnecessarily before his friends. Parents should do all they can to guide i their hoy and bring him to value high ideals, hut- it is not necessary to humiliate iijm in front of his fellows. LAUNCHED ON THE SEA OF LIFE. " You know, before you realise it., your boy has grown up and! gone away, for our race is a roving one, and we all seek betterment and business advancements, going afield more often than not. It is,, sad td lose your boy, for then the process of training and your ;companionship with him is ended; the boy is launched on the sea- of life, and what he is going to do and what he is going to make of his future depend! on what you have done for him up to then. M you have kept hia respect and his affection, and have built up a comradeship with him, then (you need have very lit-110 fear that he will disgrace you or spoil his own life." In the course of his work, Mr Barton went on, he met with many cases of hoys and young men starting out on the wrong road. Ho always did his best to trace their lives back, and never yet had' he known a boy go.wrong who had been a real pal to his father. Mr Barton then spoke briefly on the boys' sido of the question. "Now boys," he said, "'listen to Dad; he's been through all you've been through, and many years more, and he's interested in you. If sometimes he .seems to you to be a little too strict, and says "no" when you think another boy's father would have said 'yes,' just think 'lsn't it good to find him so interested in me and to know he cares for me?' You know, Dad often has a strenuous day at his work, and a lot of worry. If ho gets the proper attitude when he gets home it makes a big lot of difference, and you boys can do so much to help him. A. PAL AT HOME. " In business life, Dad often starts tho day with somebody's''hand against, him, and all day long things happen to make him feel that everyone is fighting him. How glorious for him lo get home, and find there a changed feeling ; to bo able to realise and find with bis bov a sense -of real true comradeship! '' You don't know what father is up against at his office : the wear of busi-' . ness competition and the many trials ho has to meet will slowly break him down. But if you do your part, and don't be doing things all day that will worry him when he gets home, and then when he does come homo make him feel he is your best pal—■ for ho is— then he. will be glad, for he will know his work and worry bus not been in vain; he has a friend in his own house who cares and who looks on him as his comrade —his pal." The enthusiasm shown by his bearers in carrying a vote of thanks to the speaker showed that the address had struck a responsive note.