Missed the Joke.

Otago Witness, Issue 2840, 19 August 1908, Page 91

Missed the Joke.

Some people are bright enough to enjoy a. good joke, but do not have retentive memories, so as to be able to repeat it to others. Failures of this kind -are sometimes very ludicrous. We give some gocn Bpecimen<s. • The most famous of this clae was the college professor, who, on partin with a student that had called on hirt noticed that he had a new coat, -and t< marked that it was too short. The studeni with an air of resignation, replied : " I will .be long enough before I get another. The professor -enjoyed the joke heartily, and, going- -to a meeting of fbe college faculty just afterwards, he entered the room in great glee and said : " Young Sharp got off sudh a joke just now. H© .called on me a Jittle. while ago, and' as he was leaving I noticed his new coat, and told him it was too short, and he said : 'It will be- a long time before I get -another.' " No one laughed, and the professor, sobering down, remarked : "It -doesn't seem co funny &s when he said it."

A red-haired lady, who was ambitious of literary distinction, found but poor sale for her 'bojrfk. A gentleman, in spealcing of (her disappointment, said : " Her hair is red fxend] if her book is not." An auditor, in attempting to relate the joke elsewhere, said : " She has red hair if hear book hasn't."

The most -unfortunate attempt at reproducing another's wit was mad© by an Englishman who didn't understand_ the pun, but judged from flic- applau&s with which it was gree'te-d that it must be -excellent. During -a dinner at which he- was a guest a waiter iet a boiled tongue slip off the plats on which he -was bearing- it, and it f-eil on tihe table. The host at once apologised ior -the mishap as a lapeus lingxiae (slip -of th-e tongue). The joke was the best thing at the -dinner, and our -friend -concluded to bring it up at his awn table. He accordingly invited his company, and instructed a servant to let fall a joint oi beef as he -was bringing it to the table. "When the "accident" occurred he exclaimed: "That's a lapsus KnguEe." Nobody laughed, and he said again : " I say that's a lapsus linguae," and still no one laughed. A screw was -loose somewhere, so h-e told about the tongue falling, and they did laugh.

" Why is this," said a waiter, holding up a common kitchen utensil, "more remarkable than Kapoleon Bonaparte? Because Napoleon was a. great man, but thie is a. grater." "When the funny man reproduced it in his circle he asked the question right, but answered it: "Because Napoleon was 'a great man, but this is a nutmeg-grater."