MUDDLERS.

Otago Witness, Issue 2809, 15 January 1908, Page 72

MUDDLERS.

We all know them, for bhey exist in ev&ry class of life, and ar« the source of constant confusion, irritation, and — bad language, no doubt, too, whenever they axe. A curious thing about muddlers is that they never realise that they a.re muddlers. The man who muddles away his own or his wife's fortune expects the commiseration and 1 sympathy of his friends and the practical assistance of his people, without in the least Tecognising that he is scarcely entitled to either. The woman who muddles away her liealth, either through obstinate inattention or devotion to quack medicines, or persistent worry and unrest, is always ready to play the role of the gently martyred one, and never gets as much sympathy as she is sure she needs — unless, indeed, she really takes the part seriouly and 'loans herself out," so to speak, as an advertisement of the wonderful cure effected by some popular medicine. The girl who muddles her love affairs and either palls upon, the man with her too

cheap affection or wearies him by het coquetry is always the ill-used person, without any conception of her own folly,, The mother "who muddles a-wa.y her dignity and authority over her children, which should be hers by reason of hep bad management and lack of self-control poses as the 'saddest martyr of all — unless, indeed, we except the wife who muddles away her husband's love with her whining or nagging, and realises too !ate> that Love, once freed from his gracious captivity, never returns. Yet none of this is quite the realisation of the word! as it is commonly used, for we speak of "a muddler" usually in regard to the everyday and material happenings of life, scarcely recognising that) there are just as many muddlers in the serious aspects, the really great issues of life as there are in the domestic details, and that everyday — yes, everyday — tragedies no less than, comedies are being 1 wrought out by the muddlers. They are, usually, well-intentioned people — often very lovable people. And in their happy-go-lucky, entirely incompetent Tanks are perhaps numbered, our friends, our rela* tives, our maids — never, of course, our-i selves !

Muddling, in nine cases out of ten, is responsible for that insistent, wearisome excuse for shortcoming and failures — "no time." No time to practise, no time to read, no time to do anythipg-, no time to do nothing. And to do nothing is sometimes much more important than to do anything. We -have all the time there is, and if we arrange it, instead of muddling it, we sihall soon see what we really have time to do and what we have not ; and then begins the process of selection. Some things must be done — are absolutely! necessary to life, or health, or happiness, so they come first. Some things "are done" — that means our friends do them, and so we think We should do them. Some thinga we know we should do, though we certainly can live without, such as going to church, resting, going out, reading — all dear delights, perhaps, for which we sadly assure ourselves we hardly ever have time., Perhaps it is true, and if so the firstl thing it to do, as^the captain whose too-hearvily-loaded! ship is threatened with destruction, is to throw some of the cargo overboard, get rid of some of the useless conventionalities, or formalities, or needless things of some kind to make room,, or time for the things of the spirit. On the other hand, we may really havo time for all these things, but simply, squander it by being muddlers. Most children are irraddlers naturally } thereior^, there is all the more need for the grown-up people in the house not to be muddlers, because it is no good preaching one thing, and practising another: no good to tell them to be neat unless you are neafc yourself ; no good to tell them to put each thing back in its own place unless you set the example ; no good to tell them, the advantages of punctuality unless the routine of rising, baths, meals, and bedtime is all regular, and punctuality .s rigorously enforced as a habit and upheld by example. If there were more sympathetic people the work of the world would be wonderfully lightened; or, since we are apt to be individualists, we women, and not keenly concerned with the affairs of the world, let us say instead, the work of the home. What a lot of time is muddled away in doing other people's work! What a lot more in putting away things^ If every person simply did his or her own* duties in, the house and put away his or her own possessions, books, music, woric, and clothes, what a difference it would' make.

" Difference enough, perhaps, to leave time to read, to rest, and to go out. Boys are hardly ever taught to be neat in the house, hardly ever obliged to be punctual or to put away their clothes or possessions, and so, however neat a.id! fastidious men, are in their offices, they are nearly always untidy and dependent*' on their womenkind in the house. How much time is muddled away in "tidying up" after the maid and "putting things away" after the children, let any mother who reads these lines say. Then, as to money. More people are muddlers with money than anything else — and more time, more tears, more headaches, and cross, tired faces attest to the worry of money muddlers than any branch of muddling-. It is with money as it is with housekeeping and domestic routine, some simple (and the simpler the better) system should! be adhered' to in every household as a» family bulwark against muddling. It vs not the amount of money you have for household expenditure, or the number of servants you can keep, or the size ana? convenience of your house which tells or which ensures order as against muddled I know a woman who, with three servants, a large house, a small family, and a husband who is a model of generosity, worries and muddles from on© week's end to another, and is a nuisance to herself and her friends. I know another whose house and family is almost as large, and who yet manages with one maid to ensure an atmostpnere of peace; order, and comfort which is a benison in itself. No expenditure of time and trouble : « too great to ensure a love of order and? system, both in material and mental methods, while children are young enough, to be forming the habits which will determine their own lives and their influence