Bits from the Bulletin.

Ohinemuri Gazette, Volume X, Issue 864, 9 October 1901, Page 2

Bits from the Bulletin.

" Scotty the Wrinkler " : paddyinelon was shot at Combanning homestead recently, close to the fowlyard, having a turkey ogj in its - pouch ! The shootist is only, a boy, but his chum was with him, and both know the nature of an oath " This story should conclude with an assurance, based on Mrs Campbell Praed's authority, that the paddyinelon is a fruit. : . ... " Haiinibal" : The saying . " I'll chance it, as Oakes did lits .o.ath "refers to one Oakes, a Parrama'tta celebrity, who, tradition tells, was prosecuting a man for cattle-lifting. Evidence showed that prisoner had a pair of horns in his possession, and Oakes, asked if he could swear that the horns belonged to any beast of his, hesitated for a space—then suddenly burst out: ' * Well, I'll chance it! Yes!" Bill and Jim, on the west coast of Tasmania, found a "native tiger," and Jim took it to Zeehan on Spec, while Bill went on with the jobsplitting. Jim was to wire up the result, and this was the wire : " Blued up all thegonce. Sell the maul and wedges. Hyena dead." Probably the best known man on western N.S.W. rivers, John Egge, died this month. Of his something.', over 70 years, 40 had been spent. , trading.on the Murray.and the Darl-^ ing. He was the Quong Tart of'the outback, without the Sydneyite's propensity for making speeches. After Egge had been trading on the river for years, and had established himself in a pretty big business, the .»'/• S.A. Gtovt. woke up and demanded poll-tax from him. ■He paid, of course ; but the amount was, quickly ; made up by a shilling subscription in Adelaide and offered to the old man, who, however, passed it oh, to "a charity. He leaves a name which thousands of men with whiter skins might well be glad of. In Wilcannia t'other day a swaggie put down his bluey in front of a pub., , went down on his knees, clasped his hands fervently together, and cried out several times "In vain—in vain !" At length a smarty asked him what was in vain. " Why, ' v'you fools," said the swaggie, shouldering his t bluey. A Vie. clergyman was holding forth to his flock, on a recent pre-election Sabbath morning, urging them to choose a man of sterling worth and irreproachable character as their Parliamentary representative. As if . to emphasize the good man's appeal, pbyiously made on behalf of a oertain goody-goody candidate, a fine Newfoundland dog, owned by a local publican who had a reputation for Sunday-trading, strolled in from the street, carrying in its mouth a man's hat of a peculiar shape, affected by the goody-goody candidate aforementioned. The dog marched up the aisle, climbed on to the platform, walked round the pulpit, gracefully saluted it in the ususi doggy mariner, " scratched gravel,** then sat down facing the audience, and exhibiting. the crown of the hat, whereon was chalked " Vote for Goody-Goody and Sunday beer." There was half-a minute of strained silence, - during which the dog seemed to have caught the echo of a fay-off whistle, for he ; pricked up his ears arid trotted amiably back to,whence he came. The ..... congregation stuffed its hahdkefcnief into its mouth, and" the service wai hurriedly closed, even the singing of the dogs-holiday being dispensed with. • The West has developed a new peat for its flocks in the common fish-hawk. Tho hawk's specialty lies in ripping up the loins of young lambs and tearing out their kidneys. On some stations the lambs are killed in scored. The death-tax is as big a grab as the birth-swindle. Only lately I have known two cases where the lowest '- charges (after haggling) of the undertakers were £8 and £6 respectively. ; The first man was poisoned by raw whisky on raw oysters, given him by a publioan, who evidently dosen't know the nature of taking the oath. Same week a man was billed for £6 for a pine box and and one-horse shay used < at the local hospital for his lather, A neighboring squatter was mulct in £180 for a shift.to Wagga. That puts one in mind of the Cold Meat Train, where late revellers sat on coffins so as to save their leave at Aldershot. But a chum of. mine " had " them. He died with a bottle in oue hand and a pound in the other. The inquest collared the quid, but buried him in Christian ground— if there's any Christianity on the Colombo. The cemetery folk make you buy the allotment (30s in Narnndera). I refused to pay for my mate's bed, and told them they might dig him up, and I'd plant him on the Sandhill. Then they let me rail him in (this was on the I Cranko), because it improved the 1 look of the cemetery.