THE COMMON ROUND

Otago Daily Times, Issue 18510, 22 March 1922, Page 2

THE COMMON ROUND

By W>YFABEB. Scientists have , discovered that there is considerable activity in 'the sun. Doubtless this accounts for the eruptions by Bishops *-aston and Whyte last week. There is at least this to be said for Eamon do Valera, that he is making 10 attempt to gloss over the terrors of the civil war he is advocating in Ireland. It is over the dead bodies of their brothers that his Republican dupes must march. He is perfectly frank about it. The foreign diplomat who purchased a pack of dogs which might act as sentinels guarding his art treasures in Paris, but which emitted not a bark on the night when the burglars arrived, has forgotten his history. Geese might have served him better. The friendly competition between Bishop Whyte, of Dunedin, and Bishop Liston, of Auckland, in saying unfriendly things about the nation which shelters them both was won handsomely by the latter. But the North need not bo unduly elated over its success. After all, Bishop Liston is a product of the South. It was in the South that lie acquired all the strange knowledge his possession of which has excited the wonder of the North. And anyhow those who peruse the pages of the organ of his church in the South can rear! every week what was said at the St. Patrick’s Day concerts last week and is to be heard only once a year on the public platform. Mr Wilford, leader of the pa-liamentary party with the forbidding name, has not seen his way dear to grant any interviews to the press while in the South Island. He was not prepared to do anything more than discuss the name by which his party should bo known. 1 One of his supporters has suggested that, the party should be known ns the “ United Party.” A very good name so long us it is warranted by facts. But Mr Wilford is not favourably impressed with it. It would have been quite appropriate as applied to Mr Vcitoh’s party of one which has now amalgamated with Mr Wilford’s party of—what was the number? Eleven—a cricket team—or thirteen —a baker’s dozen ; —some odd old number like that. The term “United” might even have been applied with some degree of fitness to Mr Statham’s party of two. But it would be unsafe to adopt it as the title of tho combination now headed by Mr Wilford. Ho cannot forget how a process of attrition in the Liberal party set in when he became its loader. But it is sad to think that already he and his lieutenants have become disappointed with tjie brand-new name with which their parly blossomed forth into public notice only a few weeks ago and that they are casting about pathetically for a now title. Suppose, for the meantime, we call it the Nondescript party. There is, I am credibly informed, a lack of foundation for tho rumour that, after tlio competition for a guinea prize for a new name for the Wilford-Statham-Veitch party has been completed, a prize of £5 will be offered for the best policy for the party. It was gravely stated the other night, in an appreciation of the leader of the amalgamated Oppositions, that at the last general election, “when members of his side were going down like ninepins, in a three-cornered contest, with a Reform and an extreme Labour candidate against him, Mr Wilford romped home with over 1000 votes to his credit.” If the arithmetic by which tho .result thus expressed was reached is the arithmetic of the Opposition, the finances of the country would not be very safe in the hands of Mr Wilford’s party. Actually, as the cold figures of the Returning Officer .show, the number of votes recorded against Mr Wilford was 1314 more than was polled by him. Most people who use the city tramway service will agree that the conductors as a class —not necessarily all of them individually, for there may be an exception or two—are courteous, obliging, and attentive. The consideration which some of them show to aged and infirm passengers is knightly and touching. Moreover, they have generally a regard for their personal appearance that cannot fail to make a favourable impression upon visitors from other centres where the tramway employees are slovenly, in their attire and careless about the observance of tho need of cleanliness. All this is greatly to the credit of the tramways staff in Dunedin. But it does not constitute, as some correspondents of the Daily Times seem to think, a good defence of a charge of petty pilfering which is made by a passenger against one particular conductor. " It is as relevant to this charge as would be a plea that a person charged with the misappropriation of trust funds made a jjractioe of conducting family worship every morning. There may be black sheep in every flock, and if there is among the tramway conductors one who has sticky fingers, the rest of them will probably be relieved if his services are dispensed with, so that they may not bo liable to be tarred with tho brush that is applied to him. One service which the public offices, in common with the banks, render to thoughtloss people, is that of reminding them of the occurrence of anniversary festivals. They perform this service in different ways;—the banks by closing their doors and the public offices by displaying their flags at the masthead. But for this double reminder Friday last might have passed without the people os a whole realising that it was St. Patrick’s Day. Many a person may. on tho 17th March, have as much difficulty in associating the date with a festival occasion as had an American who arrived in Belfast on the Twelfth of July, in time to see the Orange procession t,o by. He accosted a Belfast man who was watching it, and said, ‘‘Say. what’s up?” The Belfast man looked at him in astonishment, and replied. "It’s the Twal’th!” “Yes, I know it’s the twelfth,” the American answered, ‘but what’s up?” The astonishment on tin Belfast man’s face increased. “It’s the Twal’th of July!” le said. “Yes, I know it is.” said the American, “but what’s up?” This was more than the Belfast man could stand, "Ah, for Gawd sake, man, away an’ read your Biblo!” he said indignantly. Tlin announcement that Mr J. S. Douglas, Mayor of the city, will he a candidate this year for a scat, in Parliament, suggests tin; reflection that tho attainment of the mayoralty of Dunedin seems to act as a spur on the occupants of the office to seek after distinction in a wider political field. Six Mayors of Dunedin in the past—Fish, Reeves, Ross, Gore, Dawson, and Stewart—have been elected members of the House of Representatives. More than six of the Mayors of the city who have stood for Parliament have not . had their ambition realised—namely, Leary, Gourley (who, however, entered for the Legislature by tho back door loading through the Upper House), Chapman, Haynes, Cargill, Chisholm, lioudon. and M’Donald. Some rf them came very severe croppers. Rumour now has it that another ex-Mayor. who has not previously sought a seat in Parliament, will he among the candidates at the general election. There seems to be some doubt in *he minds of Ministers as to whether the question of raising the charges for telephone services has been discussed by them, thus: — Pi r Francis Bell (At- Mr Massey (Prime tornev-gencran : The Minister! :No proposals i ciiicstion of increasing providing for mi inth*- telephone - xchange crease in telephone 1 subscriptions was re- charges have been subceivinc the attention of mitted to the Cabinet tho linrernmrnt,. but and moreover T have . no electron had vet reason for believing no . been arrived at.— proposals have even ("Hansard,” Februarv come before the Po.-t----•jl ’ master-general. (Press Association telegram, March 3.1.) Not to know, or know of. “Babe” Ruth in the United States is to argue one’s self unknown. There will be hardly a day during the next few months on which his features will not be limned in some American paper or another. There will be no headline composed of bigger or blacker letters than that which will proclaim that “Babe” has scored another home run. And that is to say that “Babe” is a star performer at the game of glorified rounders which constitutes the national pastime of the Americans. In proof of which, i’ is recorded (hat he has entered into a five-year baseball contract on terms that will give him a salary exceeding £15,000 a year, A large sum to realise through the possession of a quick eye, a stout pair of wrists, and nimble feet—together with, perhaps, a sharp tongue, for the baseball player is exposed, when his turn (o hat comes, not only to the battery of the pitcher with the ball, but also to a storm of taunts and jeers from the fieldsmen to which lie is expected to reply in kind. When one comes to think of what a man may earn bv being a champion bfexer, or a champion jockey, and now by being a cliampipn baseball player, one is driven to the conclusion that brawn, supplemented no doubt by nerve, has become an endowment which competes with that of brains for material recognition.