AFTERNOON TEA TALK

New Zealand Mail, Issue 1682, 25 May 1904, Page 25

AFTERNOON TEA TALK

At a fashionable wedding recently the white-clad bridesmaids, instead of carrying bouquets, carried white fur muffs, the gift of the bridegroom.

# * * Small hats of twisted straw have flat •- spots of chenille all oyer them. Little bunches of spring flowers dotted here and there on the brim around the crown is the chief trimming.

Poplin—the real Irish, deliciously soft poplin—in all sorts of beautiful shades, is about to occupy a foremost place on fashion’s list. It is produced in many tender greys, pastel blue, and pinks. Its wearing properties are excellent.

[For a recent wedding -chiffon velvet and crepe de chine are the ideal fabrics. Plain cloth is too suggestive of the practical side of existence, whereas the materials just named are completely picturesque, and toilettes made of them are useful afterwards as gowns of ceremony for ordinary social events.

There is no getting away from the fact that all the skirts will be much fuller. Even a tight-fitting tailormade coat-bodice, knowing no wrinkle and having fulness, only in the sleeve, will come stiffly to a point in front a cloth tailor-cut skirt that is gathered in full at the waist. And with gowns of a more : dressy order this skirt fulness is even more pronounced.

■-* * * Once let a man think you are trying to influence him, and your hope of success is gone. He is a contrary creature, and doesn’t want to be managed or improved. A man resents what he calls interference, but almost at the same time he will confess that his womenfolk have a tremendous influence upon every man’s life. A woman’s influence is limitless for good, but to be the best it must be unconscious influence.

"Women -who are susceptible to headaches are only too prone to fly bo socalls cures. The “Lancet” calls attention to the effects upon the public health of the sale of such remedies as headache powders. In New York the deaths from heart failure increased from 4069 in 1900 to 5461 in 1902. Last year it was discovered that articles sold as headache powders were largely adulterated. Chemists were warned against the practice, and there* was at once a decline in the death rate from heart failure.

(So flat is the hair worn on top that a whole group of tips, with some upstanding decoration rising from the centre, has recently been one fashionable woman’s headdress. Another has been pleased to. carry a small pancake of tiny roses, with a little spray standing at the left, and all with a certain “chic” that was quite fascinating. In too many instances, however, the hair that is brought out far beyond the forehead looks heavy and uncomfortable, and with the flatness on top that is considered so stylish the coiffure seems as if it were a roof covering for the head. * * *

Forecasts of the coming spring fashions indicate that there is already one very pronounced fashion in fabrics—indeed, it has never quite left us’ but 1904 will see it revived with gathered energy and with all the fervour of 1830, and that is taffeta. Once again

will the silk dress he a necessity in the

wardrobe of the women of fashion, and « it bears a striking resemblance .to the silk dresses worn by our grandmothers. The taffeta, however, is of softer make, and has a brighter effect while it is produced in shadings, both plain and shot, more exquisite than ever before. Many trimmings have made a simultaneous appearance with taffeta, and this will doubtless be a season of striking ornamentation. Bouillinnes, choux, and passementeries must all be pressed into service in the construction- of the successful taffeta frock. The leading Parisian modistes are using taffeta piped with velvet and ruched with the same, as well as with frayed out ruches of the like fabric. Then there is a spotted taffeta with a shot ground, the spot in most cases consisting of one woven in black velvet. This requires ' to make it a beautiful garment.

Here is a woman’s theory that will harmonise with the opinions of some mothers, but we suppose that the majority will have strong objections to it. ‘The neglectful mother, however, will find it an invaluable, means of justification. Some wonien, out of excess of love perhaps, are foreever bothering their children about trifles. Oine of the reasons that the average child does not behave better is because children get tired of their mothers, just as mothers sometimes weary of their children. Children who are inattentive, disobedient, and altogether disagreeable with their mother will almost change their character when their father comes in from his business, not necessarily that they love him better than they do their mother, (but because he is

fresh and new and interesting; a delightful person because he is a novelty. A very rich women said once that she visited her children in the nursery once a day. Whatever the pressure of her engagements, the hours from five to seven were kept, sacred to the children. To her chidren she is, and always will be, a sort of goddess, a wonderful being, who never scolds nor punishes, but reads to them and plays and talks with them, then flits away, to return for the same, dear programme to-morrow, and to-morrow, and all the days. She is an event to them, a constant joy.

A girl loses little bits of her love every time she stoops to flirt, and removes herself just a step further from +hat ideal woman she would hope to be thought by at least some one nice man.

* * m In making clothes for the poor, especially any garment for a working man, have nothing to do with the deceptive cotton stuff called flauflelette. The shocking prevalence of disease of the chest, in this country, is bad enough as it is, remarks the “Irish Homestead,” without that death-haste-ner.

* * * One of the most noticeable novelties at present to be found in the coiffeui’s category of charms is the Pompadour puffed out at the sides, but so arranged that quite a depression is noticeable in the centre, leaving the head flat at the. top. This gives the coiffeur a chance of arranging the beautiful Juliet cap upon her client’s head.

When two people with personalities of their own spend all the time together, is it any wonder if each loses something of the delight that ought to come from the companionship? It is better for some women to try systematically to escape from tbeir children once in a while, both for the children’s sake and their mother’s. Children are pleased to see the mother when they meet after a parting, and all enjoy each other’s society much better for the parting.

Some wives make a terrible mistake. They devote themselves so entirely to the cares of housekeeping and their children, that they forget the husband, who is but a man after all. Safe as they suppose themselves to be in the fortress of their righteousness, they are yet living in a glass house at which rivals may throw a stone, for a man -wants more than a housekeeper and head nurse. He wants a wife and companion, beneath whose dignity it will not be to look fair in his sight and charm his leisure hours with pleasant conversation and lively wit.

Ah English lady who has penetrated the secrets of harem life in Persia says it is quite true that many princesses can neither read nor write, and find life terribly dull. They sat for hours listening to my descriptions of the freedom and happy lives of Ehgjlish women. And many of them long for liberty .and education. Their dances, conversation, and habits are very unedifying, and they badly need the discipline of schools. When told of the respect accorded by Englishmen to their wives they sighed, and said. “Ah, how nice to marry an Englishman,” for these poor ladies receive very cruel treatment from angry husbands, who punish them by twisting their long hair so tightly round their arms that the women scream with pain. Eor trifling offences they are beaten or otherwise humiliated. Only wives with money and influence can obtain divorces from neglectful or cruel husbands, and divorcees are free to marry again. Harem life is very monotonous. Bands of professional dancers are employed to enliven weary hours, but their dances and those of the ladies are most objectionable.

There is a type of mother who seems to think that a daughter is always a child, and never reaches the age of responsibility. Their daughters are poor, crushed creatures, who dare hardly ever call their soul their own. They are not allowed to choose their friends, nor to invite any of them indoors, and are often brought up in such a manner that male society is looked upon as a positive sin. If these girls have any ambitions they dare not gratify them if their mothers are opposed. Even in housework their mothers will not trust them to do anything. What follows if the parents die? These unhappy girls can do nothing, and if they are unprovided for the outlook is for them black indeed. A mother’s duty is so to train a girl that she will turn out a useful member of society—one ready to take up the duty of wife and mother; but if parents persist in crushing daughters, and treating them constantly as children, the women become failures in life, and through no fault of their own. The natural tendencies, the individual bent of mind, being stunted, one can only expect the gilds to grow up insipid, sickly typos of womanhood.