THE BYSTANDER.

New Zealand Mail, Issue 1265, 28 May 1896, Page 11

THE BYSTANDER.

‘ Wbctt found make a note of.” —Capt. Cuttle. For several years past it has been reported that almost every steamer that

A WHITE WHALE.

passes Pelorus Sound near the French Parts is escorted for half a mile or so by a large

white porpoise. hen Sir .James Ilectoi was returning by the Grafton, a few weeks a<'o, he was fortunate enough to get a good view of the animal, and found it to be the rare Beluga Kingii, which has only been known to occur in New Zealand from a single imperfect skull, which Sir James described in 1872. The length of tho animal appeared to be about lift. The head and muzzle are rounded and wide, the body full but tapering to the tail. It has very powerful swimming limbs and a high pointed dorsal fin. The colour of the crown of the head is pure white, the rest of tho body being dirty white except the fins, which are black. It came rather suddenly out from tho rocky point at the entrance to the sound and swam with great swiftness and activity right to the front of the bow of tho steamer, rubbing its body against it, no doubt seeking to 6crapo off tho barnacles with which the larger cetacea are often infested. The original specimen of a skull from which tho late Dr Gray named the species, was taken home by Captain King, a whaler, but the locality is not known. The specimen in tho museum here was part of the early-formed Swainson collection.

Some of the yonng members of the House of Commons arc determined to

ELECTROPHONES IN THE HOUSE OF COMMONS.

keep well abreast of the time. They want to introduce the electrophone into the House, with a view to enablcclubs and other institutions subscribing

to the system to hear the debates. The Speaker, when consulted about the matter the other day, did not appear to regard it favourably. Now, however, a petition has been prepared to be presented for the signatures of members, in the hope of obtaining their support for the proposal.

The late Czar, Alexander, once had an ex-

citing adventure. The head of the Imperial bodyguard, General Tchcrevin, was iu the ;. habit of lying at night before

THE CZAR’S EXCITING ADVENTURE.

the door of the Emperor’s bedroom, and the Emperor, who was always in dread of attack, came upon him in the dark while himself making his private rounds. The Czar drew his pistol, aiming it at the figure extended by his door. Tchcrevin, on his part, did the same, supposing that he was in the presence of some ono who desired to penetrate into the Czar’s room Matters were, however, explained before y serious harm was done.

In the March number of the Navy and Army Illustrated, Sir Alfred uephson

SOME NAVAL STORIES,

tells some amusing man-of-war stories. When one ship was being fitted out there was a

great deal of drunkenness on board. The only unusual circumstance which the ship’s corporal could discover was that tho bumboat woman seemed to sell an inordinate quantity of butter done up into neat little pyramids. He poked his pencil into one, and pressed the sides. Immediately a fountain of gin sprang up, and the mystery was laid bare. Referring to the cheerfulness of the men under difficulties, Sir Alfred says that during the Egyptian campaign a staff officer rode up to a sailor who was staggering under a truss of hay, and, putting the query to him, ‘What arc you?’ the man replied, ‘ Well, I used to think I was a British bluejacket, but I’m d dif 1 don’t begin to think I’m a commissary mule.’ ”

Lord Wolseley, the Commander-in-Chief, was present at the recent box-

LORD WOLSELEY ON BOXING.

ing (novices) competition of tho Guards’ Brigade, and presented the prize cup to the winner of the competition. In doing so, he said: “ I have

been requested by Cuionel Fox to give this handsome cup to the winner of the middleweight event. It gives me very great pleasure in carrying out Colonel Fox's wish. I have enjoyed myself very much indeed this evening and I only hope this thoroughly British sport will continue to ll uirisli in the army, I don’t, think there is a better or more healthy pastime, and 1 take this opportunity to say that I trust it, will long continue to he practised by the Soldiers. Every soldier should consider it his duty to learn to box. There is no game so manlv, nothing that requires more pluck, and tint h tog so likely to bring out the tine quak'd'; of an athlete. I hope, the brigade v, ill lin j continue to have su:h pleasant an 1 s rria’u!-. gatherings as this, arid that sport as good will follow.” Three cheers for Lori Wolseley followed this little address. There is something delightfully breezy

MADE IN AMERICA !

about a certain section of the American press. The following arc extracts from a Ban Francisco paper : “Rev Blackguard Henry will

soon be here again for a brief sojourn. The briefer the better.” “ Huntington says that only about a hundred active, sharp men in California oppose the Funding Bill, and this they do, io he avers, because they want to get on tho company’s pay-roll. The old villain and lustful liar knows that the people are practically unanimous against him, and sent a petition three hundred thousand strong in favour of the Government taking the road. If a vote were had, there is no doubt that it would bo like that in opposition to Chinese immigration some years ago, when less than one thousand voted in favour of the little yellow man.” “Hypocrite, slanderer, libertine, forger, perjurer. That’s ‘ltov’ Dr. Browns record up to date. Yet ho continues to preach the word of God, in his ‘ house of ill-

fame,” which he calls the 1 sanctuary/ while inspired female idiots cover him with flowei’3, and pious male frauds or fools give him the ‘ helping hand.’ ”

That but ninety-two years ago our ancestors believed in marvels outdoing

A TO UGH YARN ABOUT A WHALE.

present stories about the sea serpent is shown by an item which the Church Times has unearthed from the Daily Mercury of the 12th July,

1801 “An enormous whale is said to have been stranded oil Flamborough Head, in the year 1250. in a state of dreadful exhaustion, with a church steeple sticking out of his mouth. On cutting uu the sacrilegious monster, which could not be performed so quickly as to prevent his convulsions from setting all the hells a-rimring, the whole congregation were found in the body of the church enclosed in the stomach of the leviathan in the very act of singing psalms, and the parson in the vestry taking a glass of wine before sermon. ’

It is an old juke that marriage is like a pair

KETTLE AND POT.

of scissors. The man and wife go very well backwards and forwards on the matrimonial rivet, but woe to whoever comes between them. In Melbourne

the other day an old man was charged with using obscene language, and his wife appeared as a witness for the defence. “Bhe approached the bench, nodding familiarly to the chairman, and before she got into the witness-box began to tell the bench, as she said, 1 the whole court, and whoever wanted to know, the blessed truth,’ She was pulled up after several attempts to put the brake on to her volubility. Then she came to the point, and actually supported the evidence of the police, instead of, as she was expected, contradicting it. Site said confidentially : 1 You know, your worships, I gave him a good hammering, and no man would stand that from a woman like me. None of you would, I know.’ Defendant was lined 20s, with the alternative of three days’ imprisonment.” But the surprise was that “ the wife was then recalled before the bench. She observed that she had no more to say. She hail tol l the truth, and if it went against her husband, could not help it. The clerk (Mr Murphyi: ‘ But you are to be charged with contempt of court.’ Mrs Skinner (surpiiscd) : ‘Go on! What for?’ ‘ Because you said you gave your husband a hammering.’ 1 Well, it was true.’ ‘ But you must not use such words here.’ ‘ Well, that word’s in the Bible, and you could not ask for more than that,’ ‘ It’s nevertheless wrong to use it here’ ‘I don’t see it. But I’ll apologise to you all before this ere crowd if you say J’ve done wrong.' Mr Eade, J. p . : ‘That will hardly do us. You will be sentenced to six hours' imprisonment.’ ”

A novel scheme, says Lloyd's Newspaper, is

A NOV KL SCHEME.

now under the consideration of the authorities, which, if carried out, would confer a distinct boon upon depositors

in the Post Office Savings Bank. It is proposed to issue Savings Bank Postal orders in books of eight bearing face values of ten shillings, fifteen shillings, one pound, and two pounds, tho commission on each order being three-halfpence. They would be printed in pink, anti to obviate risk of fraud would be payable to depositors only, who would have to produce their deposit books when cashing them. To obtain a book of orders a depositor would give ordinary notice of withdrawal, specifying the value of each order required, and would have to give a receipt in full at his local post office, as if drawing cash. The head office ledgers would be so marked that while a depositor would be in a position to meet any sudden demand for money his account would only lose interest at the date and to the amount of each order as cashed. As at the present time a large number of depositors are found to use the money telegrams, which are expensive, and often require a delay of two days before the sum can lie obtained by the sender, it is thought that the proposed scheme would be eagerly welcomed, and that the commission of three halfpence on each order would not only pay the cost, of working, but provide a handsome revenue.

A strange case of poisoning by mis-

A NU USE’S FATAL h RltOR.

adventure at the Birmingham Workhouse was investigated by a Coroner’s jury lad month. A trained, experienced nurse, who had in»t met ions to inject a weak solution of strychnine

into a patient’s arm, used bv mi-take a solution of morphia, and the patient died from the eff’ets of the drug. There wax no palpable reason for this fatal eriot. Too two solutions with otte r dmigei'ou < drugs were kept iu a special eupb-Mid, tin-■/ wore ill similar buttles, will) labels of tin. -rune pat .ern. Blit if the nur.-e i. , 1 tab the .'tu ple precaution of reading the on e x .-he would have been aide at mice t > di-tiug u' -!: between them. .She did not do this. She took uu the bott'e she thought con'.uined the strychnine, and used it almost mechanically, and not till she had injected the solution and had noticed the colour of the drug was she awakened to what she had done. Then she made every effort to rectify her blunder. Thu patient, however, was in such a fragile condition that nothing could be done to counteract the deadly effect of the narcotic.

The art of photography is being rapidly

PHOTOGRAPHIC NOVELTIES.

developed in new directions. M. Bontan, the naturalist, who studies the wild life of the Mediterranean in the garb of a

diver, has succeeded in taking some photographs of the sea bottom. He uses flash light obtained from a spirit lamp and magnesium powder, which is covered by a water tight hell-jar. The lamp stands on a barrel containing oxygen gas, which he employs to work the lamp and the pneumatic shutter of the camera. He breathes through the supply pipe of the diving dress. The camera is water-tight, and stands on a tripod near the barrel, so that the shutter and the flashlight can lie worked together. A Western enthusiast has devoted himself to photographing tho animals of the forest in

their nightly wanderings. He would set a wire in the path of the animal he wished to photograph, and adjust the camera so that as the animal came along and made contact with the wire blitz-pulver was ignited and in the flash the picture was taken. In this way some beautiful specimens of deer in all sorts of attitudes, of mountain lions, badgers, opossums, an 1 so forth, have thus been secured, and many new features developed of great interest to the naturalist.

As amusing incident occurred at the recent dinner of the National Tele-

THE DEMOSTHENES or ELECTRICITY.

phone Company. Mr \V. 11. I’reecc, the engineer-in-chief of the post office, was present as a guest, and was called upon to speak. In allusion to Ins well-known oratorical gifts, the gentleman who called upon him

described him as the “ Demosthenes of Electricity,” and the toast-master, evidently under the impression that this was his official title, craved silence for “ Mr Preece, the Demosthenes of Electricity.”

An Eiffel Tower, similar to those erected at

ANOTHER El EPEE TOWER.

the World’s Fair, Chicago, and at the Paris and Philadelphia Exhibitions, will be erected this season at the India and

Ceylon Exhibition at Earl’s Court, The tower will be handsomely designed, provided with passenger lifts, and have several balconied stories. The top platform will accommodate about 100 persons,and from this an excellent view may be obtained. At night, it is to be illuminated by a lighthouse lamp of 4,000.000 candle power.

An illustration of the seriousness of Japanese

.1A I’ANESE PROGRESS.

competition with the industries of the West is seen in the fact that the committee of Lloyds hud before them recently the

nucstion of registering a ship of -1000 or 5000 tons now in course of construction by a native firm at Yokohama. In this connection it may be mentioned that the great, firm of Armstrong, Mitchell and Co. are so thoroughly persuaded that Japan is the corning country that they are considering whether they should not set. up an extensive establishment near one of the Japanese ports.

Mr Streeter, the London jeweller, tells of

A THIEF’S CLEVER DEVICE.

an ingenious attempt to rob him. One day a gentleman came in and asked to look at some articles, among which were a few tine unset diamonds.

Whilst looking at these he fixed a small portion of cobMur’s wax underneath the ledge of the counter, and pressed one of the diamonds against it, and, of course, the diamond stuck there. Soon after his departure the stone—one of the largest was missed. Later on in the day a lady entered, and while siie was making a small purchase it was noticed that she slipped something into her pocket. It was the piece of oobblei's wax with the diamond on it!

The monkey which preserved the life of an infant during the late disastej saved at Johannesburg, and was by A found nursing it after the exMONKKy. plosion, has arrived at Southampton. The Westminister Gazette has unearthed the record of a parallel case. The crest of the Duke of Leinster, which is a monkey, the supportcis being two monkeys, and the motto “ Crom a boo”—“The monkey for ever”—has this origin : While an infant, John Fitzgerald, the head of the family, was in the Castle of Woodstock, when an alarm of tire was raised. In the confusion that ensued the child was forgotten, and on the servants returning to search for him the room in which he lay vas found in ruins. Soon after a strange voice was heard in one of the towers, and on looking up they saw an ape, which was usually kept chained, carefully holding the child iu his arms. The Earl afterwards, in gratitude for his presen ation, adopted a monkey for his crest. Dean Swift, who was on bad terms with the Leinster family of his day, lias ridiculed this incident in his account iu “ Gulliver’s Travels ” of the hero when in Brobdingnae being carried away by an ape, whom lie had good reason to believe tool: him for a young one of his own species.”

IN an article on “ Young Men and Marriage,”

YOUTHFUL .MARRIAGES.

Dean Farrar «:iys There is one hindrance to the lawfulness of marriage which ought never to In overlooked : it is

hopeless poverty, or entire uncertainty of any continuous tm-nti:, of earning a livelihood. T i marry like 1 rate 1 ea-ts which have no under-t m line, •is sometimes done by mere boy-: an i on-; in the slums, within hali-u-eio v n "1 d" ' itution, or with no snore s e-ure pro in -■ ■ - ,;>n: n'enanee than a chance job of a week i i i '.is ne re ievolt ing sellishn a-- and anim-il d'gradation. These are the marriages winch blight society with the prolific birth of a teebie, stunted, Halfs arved, vicious, and semi-idiotic offspring, to the curse of a future generation. If a man lias not sufficient means to maintain a wife and family, his marriage does but kick against the ordinance of his destiny. His selfishness will not only inevitably doom himself to grinding care and crushing anxiety, Hut will drag down his wife and children into the pitiless abyss of hunger and misery. Be he clergyman or layman, the man who has not sufficient means on which to marry commits a crime against society if he marries on the chance of something ' turning up.’ To such persons nothing ever does 1 turn up.’ ”

An exciting incident happened recently to the Carmarthenshire Hounds.

AN Kxcrma hunting INCIDENT.

Ihe fox they were pursuing leaped from a precipice on the Cardigan coast into the sea, followed by the pack. The

huntsman, who had for some time been following the bounds over the rocks alone and on foot, clambered down the face of the cliff until about half-way to the beach. He found it impossible either to go further or to retrace his steps, He sounded

his bugle, and eventually a farmer came to his assistance with a stout rope, by which he lowered himself to the sea level. Each hound in turn was made fast to the rope and hauled up to the top, and when this had been successfully accomplished the huntsman himself was also rescued.

America’s great after-dinner speaker, Mr ChauDccy M. Dcpcw, tells the

WILL YOU AUTOGRAPH ?

following story of his recent tour in the Southern States: “ I went to an hotel m Georgia and said to the clerk :

“ ‘ Where shall I autograph?’ “ ‘ Autograph ?’ gasped the clerk. “ 1 Yes; sign my name, you know,’ “ 1 Oh, right here.’ “ 1 signed my name in the register. In a little while in came some Georgia ‘crackers.’ One of them advanced to the clerk. Will you autograph?’ asked the clerk, with a smile. “‘ Sart’nlv, mine’s rye,’ said the Georgian, beaming. 1 What’s yours, fellows ’’ turning to the other ‘ crackers.’ “The clerk treated with a good grace Then he leant back and glared at me. I felt sorry for him, and was somewhat conscience-stricken. “ ‘ Too bad,’ I said ; ‘ this is what comes from speaking a foreign language in one’s own country.’ ”

An Indian officer, stationed at Pesbawur, tells how he took with him to

THE pATnAN ANDTHE GAS LAMPS.

Calcutta to act as servant a trans-frontier Pathan, who had never been lower down country than Pesbawur in his life. On arrival at Calcutta the Pathan was much itn-

pressed with the size and number of the public buildings ; but on seeing the gas lamps lighted in the evening he was amazed beyond measure, and said to his master, “Verily the power of the Sirkar (Government) is great! Lo, see these rows of iron pillars, which at a touch burn at tho top, and show a light as of noonday, and yet have neither oil nor wick 1”

Mr Howard Paul in his new book, “Dinners with Celebrities,”

A GLADSTONE YARN.

tells how he once dined with Mr Gladstone at a Savage Club spread. One injudicious

Savage undertook to draw from the guest of the evening an opinion of Lord Beaconsfield as a novelist, bilt the attempt was unsuccessful. Being in an anecdotal rather than a critical vein, Mr Gladstone turned to Archibald Forbes, the famous war correspondent (who was ono of the guests), ann asked him if he remembered the tale about Canning, who, when called upon at a Ministerial whitebait dinner at Greenwich, simply said: —“Gentlemen, this is a fish dinner, and I shall imitate the habits of that animal, who is said to drink a great deal and say nothing !” “ Yes,” added Palmerston, who was present, “ better a dinner of herbs where no speaking is than whitebait and oratory therewith.”

A new parlour game, which offers opportunity either for graceful

TIIE latest parlour Game.

compliment or humorous raillery, is called the game of initials. Ono person giving out his initials. Then all,

provided with pencil and paper, are given a certain time, perhaps three minutes, in which to write a three word characterisation of this person, the words beginning with the initials in the order given. For instance, ABC is described by one as “ a beneficent creature,” by another as awkward, but courteous,” by a third as “ always buying cheese,” and so on. At the end of the timo allotted all the descriptions are read aloud, and the initials of the next person are used in the same way.

A somewhat amusing case came before the Common Serjeant at the

A socialist’s expensive dinner.

Central Criminal Court, in London, recently. George Brown, an elderly man, desscribed as a jeweller, strolled

into the Castle Hotel, Richmond, and having examined the bill of fare, directed the waiter to bring him soup, rump steak, and other food. He had a glass of sherry with his soup, and pronounced it so good that he told the waiter he really must have another, at the. same time ordering “a nice cigar.” He scenic 1 to enjoy himself immensely, and then settled for a siesta. Presently lie was awakened by tiie landlord, who presented him with his hill. IJe sain he had no money. Convictions for similar offences were prosed. Steaks and chops, champagne and oilier wines, and cigars were lii.s usual bill of fare on these occasion-;, and he now submitted to lii.s lordship that this was only what he ha 1 al vays been us" 1 to in the days of his piosperity, and t hat. the debts were recoverable by process of law. He essayed to address his lordship upon the socialistic view of the ease, but tho Common .Serjeant sentenced him to nme months’ imprisonment with hard labour. THE DAWNING REVELATIONS. Now that seers of modern science flash with cathode rays defiance Through those substances we used to call opaque, Lei the rising generation quake with fear and trepidation At the awful revelations they will make.g Many foreheads cleft with ridges that bespeak a brain prodigious Will be found to cover nothing but a wheel ; Many peach and cream complexions will reveal, through these dissections, Skins tiie colour of: an old banana peel. And if rays should be directed through the breast of some rejected Man who wails his iieart is broke or Eomcfhing worse, In nine-tenths of all the cases it is safe to say the basis Of the breaking would be found to be the purse.

And it is a question whether many a shoe of patent leather— Could these rays but pierce the upper and the sole— Would present a cotton stocking of immodesty so shocking That each toe is robbed of clothing by a hole. But (he saddest revelation of this modern innovation Would be brought upon our sample-hunt-ing shoppers ; For if science e’er disperses rays of light throughout their purses It were doubtful if they’d fall on aught but coppers. Chicago News.