THE BYSTANDER.

New Zealand Mail, Issue 1249, 6 February 1896, Page 12

THE BYSTANDER.

lt When found make a note of." —Caft. Cuttle. In the Contemporary Review, Dr. Dillon, a gentleman who knows Russia and Russian opinion very well, advocates a British alliance with the Czar. Here is his case in Bupport: —It is impossible to blink the fact that there. i 8 a growing feeling among the English people in favour of a formal alliance with Russia alone-, which would, of all prove, it is believed, most conducive to the well-being of the empire and the peace of the world. Most of the capital interests which-Great Britain has to safeguard, and most of the dangers of which she endeavours. to steer clear, lie outside of Europe. And of the European Powers who have heretofore crossed her path, Russia is politically bj far the mo3t formidable. Her exDansive power is marvellous, her enterprise indomitable, and her success with Mahomedan and barbarous race 3 signal. The qualities, opportunities, and resources, which have made her thua far formidable as j a rival, and dangerous as an enemy, would, it is affirmed, in future render her invaluable as a friend. The ba=is fr>r an intimacy of this kind is already existent in the aliened parallelism of tho interests of the two countries, and the peculiar nature of their , respective needs and resources, which mutually supplement each other.

An English officer tells the following Otory of a game of billiards he once witnessed in India. As the result" of an animated discussion, a match was agreed upon, ]SOO up, between two of the best billiard players among the officers—one to p'ay with his left hand, the other to use his right, but to play standing on the left foot only. The latter was allowed to sit between strokes, but had to proceed from his seat hopping and made his stroke while only standing on the left leg. Left leg was the favourite, but the result proved that billiards require two feet to play them, for, when game was called, the officer playing with his left hand was found to be more than seventy ahead of his opponent.

One day a malicious person said to the younger Your father was a mulatto, was he not?" To which Dumas replied. " Yes, sir ; my father was a m ulatto, my grandfather a negro; and my great-grand-father a monkey. My genealogy begins where yours ends."

News of the latest " surgical feat" comes from America. A piece of steel was driven into the eye of Joseph Brown, of Plainfield, New Jersey. It was embedded deep in the eye, and could not be extracted by cutting without the entire loss of the eye. At the Eye and Ear Infirmary of New York they applied a powerful magnet, which will hold up 100 pounds. When the magnet was brought near the eye the piece of steel was drawn from its bed and attached itself to the magnet, and the eye will be saved.

Few people know that in the earlier years of this century Cuba, which it now looks as if Spain were destined to lose, might hive belonged to France. In the Nineteenth Century a Madame Colmache tells a curious story of how, on January Bth, 1837, Queen Christina of Spain offered Cuba and Porto Rico to France, with the Philippine Islands thrown in, for forty millions of reals. The bargain would have been completed, according to Madame Colmache, who tells the story in her paper on " How Cuba might have belonged to France," had it not been for the patriotism of the Spanish envoy Campuzano, and the higgling propensities of Louis Philippe. The king had agreed to give thirty millions for Cuba, but he boggled about the extra ten millions for Porto Rico and the Philippine Islands. At last he declared the reduction of price must be accepted. " Seven millions of reals is my offer, or else the contract must be thrown into the fire." Thereupon Campuzano jumped to his feet, stretched his whole body over the table, seized the contract, twisted it together, and, looking the king full in the face, exclaimed; "Your Majesty is in the right ; the contract i 3 worthless, and only fit to be thrown into the lire." Without another word he strolltd across the carpet and flung the paper into the flames. The company broke up without another word. Thus Cubaiemained as a Spanish possession down to this day.

Two anecdotes of the late Sir Charles Halle appear in the funeral sermon preached by the Bishop of Salford. One dates back to the earliest years of Sir Charles's resi. dence in Manchester. As the postman came to his door one morning, "Mr Halle saw that the imprudent kindness of neighbours had reduced the postman to such a condition that he was no longer able to discharge his duties. Mr Halle thereupon begged the man to come into his house and rest, and he himself delivered every one of the letters in the bag at its destination, afterwards seeing the poor man safe home. Ke did that, not so much for the man as out of pity for the iurors wife and family." But the other anecdote was even more striking. It seems that at the outbreak of the FrancoPrussian war a report was spread a false report, as it turned out—that Mr Halle's services were claimed by his country for the war. A poor cabman, who, in his distress and weary trial, had experienced Mr Halle's kindness, as so many had experienced it in their hour of need, had heard the report, and, believing it" to be true, he went to" Mr Halle and begged that he might take his place in the army—that he might endure the fatigues of the campaign, and even offer his life for his former benefactor.

Sir Robert Rawlinson, K.C.8., was knocked off his horse during the Crimean war b3' a cannon ball without being killed. Lady Rawlinson has preserved the identical forty-two pound shot, and she relates in the Woman at Home how her husband's life was practically saved by a little act of politeness. When riding out with some artillery officers, he announced his intention to a captain hard by of not going any further, an d raised his

cap, saying, " Good morning." Just at that moment a huge shot from the Russians came whizzing along, cutting the reins, the pommel of the saddle, and wedging a steel purse with terrific force against the rider's hipbone, making a cruel flesh ftound. "Had my husband not raised his arm to take his cap off/' said Lady Rawlinson, "his right arm would have been shot oft; so you see that he actually saved his life by one little courteous action."

A very pretty Christmas question is asked in verse in the December number of the Century *. — "It was after the maze and the mirth of the

Where a spray of green mistletoe swayed, That I met—and I vow that the meeting was chance! — With a very adorable maid.

" I stood for a moment in tremour of doubt, Then kissed her, half looking for war ; But—' Why did you wait, sir?' she said, with a pout. ~,, ' Pray, what is the mistletoe lor .-

The Chitral and other frontier campaigns are evidently little to the taste of Sir Auckland Colvin, the Indian Finance Minister, who, in an article on "Indian Frontiers and Indian Finance,' in the December number of the Nineteenth Century, > expresses some very pessimistic views. Thus:—"The situation is surrounded by clouds and darkness. It is a time to prophesy smooth things, to smile complacently, to exchange congratulations, to talk comfortably of the clouds going by ? It seems, indeed, difficult to understand how it can be believed that the financial outlook, as was said in the recent Indian budget debate, is better than it was three years ago. Three years ago, tho necessity of reimposing the cotton duties had not been demonstrated. The Famine Grant had not been appropriated to current revenues. Three years ago the Secretary of State sold his bills at Is 29-10 d; at present he barely touches Is The I deficit three years ago was Ks. 800,000 ; now it is estimated at well over a million. For, three years ago, the forward frontier policy had been but recently revived, and we had riot made the progress in creating and completing our new dominion and protectorate beyond the Indus which has been achieved of late. Frontier policy and Indian finance arc as inseparable as foreign policy and finance in Western countries. There can be no improvement in Indian finance so long as Indian revenues are depleted by the claims of frontier extension, or exposed to the risk and requirements of war. Consequently there can bo no vigorous internal policy, whether of railway development or of other kind."

In the St. Nicholas (a magazine for young people) are appearing some delightful letters written by Kobcrt Louis Stevenson from Samoa for the entertainment of some of his little friends in England. He signs them '• Tusitala " (tale writer), and says many amusing things about the " lean man " (himself) who lives ou an island " which is not very long and is extremely narrow." Speaking of the games of the native children, he says :—" The children play marbles all along the street, and though they are generally very jolly yet they get awfully cross over their marbles, and cry and fight just as boys and girls do at home. Another amusement in country places is to shout fish with a little bow and arrow. All round the beach there is bright., shallow water, where the fishes can be seen darting or lying in shoals. The child trots round the shore, and whenever he sees a fish lets fly an arrow, and misses, and then wades in after his arrow. It is great fun (1 have tried it) for the child, and I never heard of it doinj; any harm to the fishes, so what could be more jolly ? "

When the lean man goes into the forest (writes Robert Louis Stevenson in one of his playful letters in the St. IN icholas about himself), he is very much ashamed to own it, but he is always in a terrible fright. The wood is so great, and empty, and hot. and it is always tilled with curious noises ; birds cry like children, and bark like dogs ; and he can hear people laughing and foiling trees ; and* the other day (when he was far in the woods) ho heard a sound like the biggest mill-wheel possible, going with a kind of dot-aud-carry-one movement like a dance. That was the noise of an earthquake away down belo .v h:m in the bowels of the earth : and that is the same thing as to say away up toward you in your cellar in Kilbnrn. All these noises make him feel lonely and scared, and he doesn't quite know what he is scared of. Once, when he was just about to cross a river, a blow struck him on the top of his head, and knocked him headforemost down the bank and splash into the water. It was a nut, I fancy, that had fallen from a tree, by which accident people are sometimes killed. But at the time he thought it was a Black Boy. " Aha," say you, " and what is a Black Boy?" Well, there are here a lot of poor people who are brought to Samoa from distant islands to labour for the Germans. They are not at all like the king and his people, who are brown and very pietty ; for these are black as negroes and as ugly as sin, poor souls, and in their own luud they live all the time at war, and cook and eat men's flush. The Germans make them work ; and every now and then some run away into the bush, as the forest is called, and build little sheds of leaves, and eat nuts and roots aud fruits, and dwell there by themselves. Sometimes they are bad and wild, and people whisper to each other that some of them have gone back to their horrid old habits, and catch men and women in order to eat them.

The Stevenson letters in the St. Nicholas interest the readers greatly in Arick, the Black Boy, a waif of the Pacific, who ran away from the Plantation that he or his parents had teen " recruited to " in Samoa, and adopted " Tusitala's" house in the forest as his home. "Like the vest of them here, he is a little fello//, and when he goes about in old battered cheap European clothes looks very small and shabby. When first he came he was as lean as a tobacco oipe, and his smile (like that of almost all thojethers) was

the sort that half makes you wish to smile yourself and half wish to cry. However, the boys in the kitchen took hini in hand and fed him up. They would set him down alone to table, and wait upon him till he had his fill, which was a good long time to wait. The first thing we noticed was that his little stomach began to stick out like a pigeon's breast, .and then the food got a little wider spread, and he started little calves to his legs, and last of all he began to get quite saucy and impudent."

Golf has been declared a proper Sunday game in Toronto, where three enthusiastic golfers were recently prosecuted for contravening the old Lord's Day Act. This statute provides that "it is unlawful for any person on the Lord's Day to play at skittles, football, racquets, ball, or any other noise game." So the judge decided that golf was neither a game of ball nor a noisy game, and Canadian golfers may henceforward enjoy their favourite pastime in peace on Sundays.

American journalism is nothing if not enterprising. .An English photographer, who went to photograph the race between the Valkyrie and the Defender contributes an account of his experience to the Practical Photographer. In the course of his paper he says :—"I saw a great deal of American press enterprise, there being on board a tug about ten reporters, artists, etc., and when I was told this particular paper expected tbecoat of reporting these races would amouut to about 30.000 dollars, it will give some little idea of the intense interest and enthusiasm which this yacht race has caused. This paper had four tugs, as well as a stationary cable ship, from which they could flash the news of the race to all parts of the world. The tugs had carrier pigeons, with which they sent on the news, so that the people in Now York were kept well posted every halfhour.

Mr Barnctt (or, familiarly, " Barney ") Barnato, the financial genius of the South African mines, is a man iu the prime of life. His age is forty-two. When he landed at the Cape twenty-five years ago he was unknown, friendless and penniless, and his first earnings were those which he obtained by his juggling entertainments. He has still a passion for things theatrical, and is, it is said, writing a cosmopolitan drama, largely based upon his experiences of life in the gold country.

Japan is not enthusiastically inclined towards Australian meat. Says the Sydney Morning Herald :—" It is not well to be too sanguine, it seems, that any great development will suddenly take place in trade from this country with Japan, whatever may happen from Japan to Australia commercially. A report from Yokohama says that nothing will be done in frozen beef, for instance, as the Japs don't care a straw for beef, and don't know how to cook if. As for mutton, they wouldn't have it if they could get it for nothing. They won't look at it, and, if they would, China could supply them easier, it seems, than Australia. Byand-Ly the Japanese will manufrcture their own woollen and woollen-and-cotton fabrics, ju?t as they now manufacture their cotton. But when that will be there is no means of judging. A trade in leather may be developed. VVhat may be done, it is thought, by Australian producers is to establish stores for the sale of Australian wines, bacon, hams, tinned meats, fruits, and so on, for the use of the foreign residents in both Japan and China."

Everybody who studies Home politics is curious to see what the policy is to be with regard to Ireland. In the National Review the Lord Mayor of Dublin gives the Salisbury Government a little, advice as to the future. This is how he sums up the best Unionist policy for Ireland :

1. The creation of a competent body to deal with all purely local questions, not now within the powers of the Local Government Board.

2. A settlement of the laud question. I trust this will include the reinstatement of the evicted tenants.

o. The development of Ireland's chief industry, its agriculture, by the appointment of a Minister or the formation of a competent Board ; also the development of Irish iisheries.

-!. Aid in the development of other industries which recent experiments, notably Foxford, show may bo planted, and successfully reared in many p'aces.

5 Such a settlement of the education question as will be satisfactory to all parties.

b". The establishment of technical schools and colleges. 7. Sittings in Dublin of the Appeal Tribunal of the House of Lords.

8. A careful inquiry into the proper proportion which Ireland should contribute to the Imperial taxation, and restitution to Ireland, based upon the over-payments of the last century. 9. A further extension of Mr A. J. Balfour's Light Railways. 10. Aid in developing Ireland as tourist and health resort.

Finally, and this embraces everything, I understand " the policy " to mean a real endeavour, by the expenditure of a reasonable amount of public money, to remedy the evils caused by ninety-hve years of " Union."

Sir Charles Johnson Brooke, G.C.M G., second Rajah of Sarawak (Borneo) is one of the few Englishmen who have become absolute sovereigns of an independent State. His original name was Johnson, and he is the son of the rector of White Latchington, Somerset, his mother being the sister of Sir James Brooke, first Rajah of Sarawak. Sir Charles was educated at Crewkerne Grammar School, and served some time in the British Nav3', being lieutenant when he was called upon to take the name of Brooke and succeed his uncle in the rule of a State covering about 40,000 square miles, and a population of 350,000. The late Sir James Brooke obtained the recognition of Sarawak as an independent State from the British Government in ISO 3.

In the Nineteenth Century Mr Somers Somerset, in an article on the Venezuelan question, gives an interesting account of the frightful corruption which prevails in the South American State which has recently been so much to the front: He says :—The licme politics of the country are notoriously unjust and corrupt. Contracts, both with foreigners and natives, are not woith the paper of their deeds ; and from time to time the injured populance show a marked dislike to their ruin, an 1 a strong feeling for home reform breaks out in the city. Political power a:id the honours of office mean the opportunity to pilfer the public treasure aud ruin the commerce of their country by breaking contracts and infringing on the rights of foreigners. Such, then, is the Venezuela of to-day, and such it will remain as long as the present system of republican government continues. Socially—a moral ■ and refined aristocracy supported by a penni- j less but contented half-breed population. Politically—a mass of violence, fraud, and i corruption ; utterly untrustworthy in its | promises both to individuals and nations, and liable at any moment to overthrow such promises when a new government arises by force of arms antagonistic to the political creeds of its predecessor.

The Americans, or a section of them, ma}* be inclined to talk " Monroe Doctrine," and pose as the future (: bosses " of the Central and South American States, but the fact remains, and is admitted by Mr It. Harding Davis, in Harper's Magazine, the wellknown American periodical, that John Bull's commercial influence remains what it is. Pays Mr Davis : —When we were in Nicaragua, oiie little English banking-house was fighting the Minister of Financo and the Minister of Foreign Affairs and the President and the entire Government, and while the notes issued by the bank were accepted at their face value, those of the Government were taken only in the presence of a policeman or a soldier, who was there to see that >ou d'd fake it. You find this condition of affairs all through Central America, and you are not long in a Republic before you learn which merchant or which bank or which railroad company controls it, and you soon grow to look upon a mule loaded with boxes bearing the trade-mark of a certain business house with more respect than upon a soldier who wears the linen ribbon of the Government. For you know that at a word the soldier will tear the ribbon from his straw sombrero and replace it with another upon which is printed "Viva Dr. Homebody Else," while the trade-mark of the business-house will continue so long as English and German merchandise is carried across the sea in ships.

Birmingham finds some carious occapa' tions for its sons. At an inquest on the body of a poor fellow who was killed by falling from a roof, it was stated that the deceased by trade was "a journeyman Jew's harp maker." It is not everybody who knows what a Jew's harp is. Years ago nearly every schoolboy carried one of these monotonous twanging instruments with him. Now they seem to be declining in favour, and it was stated at the inquest that the poor Jew's harp maker used to complain bitterly of being short of work.

In personal appearance, Signor o'rispi, the Italian Premier, is a short, thiekly-built man with a heavy drooping moustache. He leads a very quiet life, and prefers his home 1 pleasures to society. He has a great love for the classics, and it is said that when Bismarck was Chancellor, the two met at Friedrichsrub, and then engaged in the attempt to outdo each other by quoting from memory long passages from the Greek and lloman authors.

An anecdote baaring on the subject of teaching, which may be of service to our University examiners when drawing up their reports on the examination results, is related in a letter by the lie v. Montague Fowler, who says: —"I remember, nine rears ago, a former rector at Crayford, in Kent, telHng me that the day before I saw him he had received a letter, remonstrating against the effect of a child's lessons in anatomy : —'.Sir, —Our Mary Jane didn't ought to learn no more about her inside. It don't do her no good, and it makes her very rude at home.' "

In the North American Review there is a " Study of Wives " in four nations—English, French, German and (Scandinavian. Our old acquaintance, Max O'llill, is very enthusiastic in his praise of the French wife. He says :—'Her constant aim is to be interesting to her husband. She multiplies herself, in turn she is his friend, his confidante, his partner in business, his chum, and, if I may use the word in its best and most refined sense, his mistress. She in forever changing her appearance. For instance, you will seldom see a French married woman wear her hair in the same way longer than three or four weeks. She knows that love feeds on trifles, on illusion, on suggestion. She understands to a supreme degree the poetry of matrimony. I have heard meu say that matrimony kills poetry ! The fools ! There is no poetry outside of it. Why is the French woman of forty so attractive ? Because every feature of her face shows that she has been petted and loved.

In the Quarterly Review the writer of an article entitled " Rival Leaders and Rival Legacies " pays tribute to the great service of Disraeli to the Conservative party. Here is a striking passage : —" The truth is, that great as were his pains to master the nuances, to conciliate the prejudices, and to stoop to the obstinacies of toe English mind, there was always a remnant of his countrymen who never felt quite certain when or how far Mr Disraeli was in earnest. These could not divest themselves of an uneasy suspicion that at the veiy moment he was delighting them with his newest phrases, his loftiest sentiments, his most elevating rhetorical figures, he might be secretly laughing at them in his sleeve. Now that he has gone, and that on each successive April 19th his primrosecovered statue in Westminster testifies • to the creation of a new industry_ior English villagers, it is the good, and not the evil, which lives after him. He has bequeathed

to his titular political descendants the power of harmonious action, and not confusion. Disraeli, and Disraeli alone, has made the new Conservatism, which is the only practicable form of Conseivatism to-dayj next only possible, but prosperous and perpetual."

lusuranee companies have to be very wide awake these days. The Citizen a London journal—says :—"A man was boasting o.n the Underground Railway recently: that he had secured for some years a large insurance, at a reduced rate, upon his stock of woollen goods in the city by an ingenious arrangement which baffled the office surveyor. He was understood to say that ha had left positive instructions with his men that no insurance surveyor was to be allowed over his premises without being personally conducted by himself. And there was prepared a carefully laid plan to mislead the surveyor as to the 'cubical contents of the warehouse, by piling up stock to cover a door communicating with the adjoining risk, in the occupation of a friend, who was also in the swindle on his side."

There are not mauy people who can give the origin of the phrase "get into a scrape. ' The New York Ledger thus enlightens us i—- " Many years ago the wild deer that roamed through the forests of England used to dig holes in the earth with their fore feet. They pawed it out sometimes to the depth of several inches, sometimes a foot or more. These holes were called ' scrapes,' and travellei-3 at dusk or night, or thosn who were careless about their footing, tumbled into them. They were laughed at for their heedlessness when they came home covered with mud, and as this frequently occurred after they had been imbibing a bit, they were said to have 'gotten into a sciape.' Some Cambridge students took up this expression, and thus it canie to be applied to people who had gotten into difficulties of various sorts/'

The San Francisco Post gives a telling little anecodote illustrating the value of muscular Christianity, and throwing light upon Church work in the great Western States cf America :—" Father Malouey was one of the best known and best loved men in Nevada," remarked an old mining man as he grew reminiscent over a small bottle, " and I am sure he did as much for the Church as any two men in the State. When Father Maloney solicited subscriptions for a new church, men who never gave before dug down deep into their pockets, and donated with an appearance of cheerfulness that was surprising. One day he walked into a saloon where a big poker game was running. He watched the play till he could speak without interrupting, and then said, ' Gentlemen, we are trying to get money enough to build a new church here. Do any of yoa feel disposed to help us out ? ' A big, raw-boned fellow, who had been losing steadily, and was consequently in no pleasant mood, growled, ' I'll rastle you for lOdols.' "

This did not discontent the good priest " Without a word Father Malouey produced the amount and laid it out on the bar. The gambler looked surprised, and hesitated, but when the other players commenced to jeer him he got up aud covered the priest's wager. Father Maloney commenced for an opening in a manner that showed he was no stranger to the sport. The big fellow made a rush, and threw out a long arm to clinch his opponent arouud the neck. Ojuick as a Hash Father Maloney grabbed his wrist with both hands, turned, and threw the big fellowclcar over his shoulders. He struck fiat on his back with a crash that made the glassware behind the bar rattle and jump. Father Maloney quietly donned his clerical coat, pocketed the stakes, aud watched .the big fellow pick himself up painfully. . 'My friends,' said ho, ' I would have been very thankful for lOdols. I had to be a little undignified, but I have made 40dols for the Church.' "

Japan can give a parallel to the recent Cloumel witch-burning episode in Ireland " A Shinto priest who professes a mysterious method of cue was recently called in to attend the wife of a farmer, living in Yamato-mura, Kagoshirua prefecture, who

was suffering from hysteria (says a Japanese paper). This priest, under the impression that the invalid woman was possessed of a fox, burned her with a pair of red-hot tongs in the abdomen and other parts of her body. The poor woman, already weakened by long illness, could not withstand this terrible order.!. In the course of two davs' process of this 'cure : the evil genius was completely exorcised, and she breathed her last, The priest was forthwith caught by the police, by whom he will be exorcised in turn/'

A writer in the New Age, in some personal reminiscences of Emerson, tells two stories of his loss of memory. " Showing me a portrait of Oliver Wendell Holmes, he said, ' You know this man I have forgotten his name ' ; yet he had known Holmes for half a century. One day he was observed to be looking for something, and, on being asked what it was he sought, be replied, ' I cannot tell its name, but it is something people take away with them and forget to return.' He was searching for an umbrella."

Antong the stories which are going the rounds concerning the Rev. Peter Mackenzie, a "character" in the Wesleyarz community, who died towards the end of November in England, is one which shows he was a thorough believer in muscular Christianity. Many years ago, after delivering a lecture in a country viTage in the North, he was returning to his host's house along a lonely road, when he was accosted by a robber. The latter was a believer in. the right of might, and requested Mr Mackenzie to turn out all the cash he had got. " Well, my dear man," replied Mr Mackenzie, " you know I am big enough to thrash you. If it's money you want, I'll give you half-a-crown." The robber would not accept this very charitable offer. Mr Mackenzie " doffed" his coat, and gave hirn what the man is now pleased to call "a, dashed good hiding." That thrashing did the man a great service, for he afterwards left the paths of vice and became one of Mr aumexous converts.