THE SCHOOLMASTER ABROAD.

New Zealand Herald, Volume XXX, Issue 9230, 19 June 1893, Page 3

THE SCHOOLMASTER ABROAD.

TO THE EDITOR. Sir, — boys of the Liberal Association School appear to have had a bad quarter of an-hour .with the " master" the other night. They hud launched all their bits of "plaints" with the tiny paper sails on the local duckpond, and were contemplating with delight the lively appearance of the liberal Armada, when a trust of robust common-sense from the mouth of the Prime Minister upset the whole fleet. Mirabeau in his day. a century ago, was nicknamed " L'ouragcm,' the Hurricane, but no speech of his could have more effectively cleared the air of revolutionary folly than this of Mr. Seddon. I think nevertheless that the " boys" have a substantial grievance after their arduous labours, in that 110 weather-prophet had given them any warning of the approaching cyclone. Now, the Premier could I think render useful service if whilst in good wind he would blow up "Jones," of Wellington— " impertinent" Jones, as the chairman of the Auckland Schools Committee properly called him—the imperious secretary of the local Ballance Memorial Committee. Jones wants money, and, like King Charles of blessed memory, he thinks a forced " benevolence" is the easiest and shortest way to get it. Accordingly it appears that he announced his intention to invade the Government oll'ices at Wellington in person, in order to levy a forced subscription from the clerks and messengers in the big wooden building. These innocents would, under the circumstances, be as helpless to resist as the denizens of a warren in presence of the rabbiter, or rats in a pit if collected for a holiday exhibition of the ferocity and quickness of the Hon. Mr. Reeves' amiable bull-dog " Conciliation," whose portrait was given to us in a clever local cartoon last weeK. Not content with forcing clerks and messengers to j stand and deliver, Jones wants to sit upon all the children in the Government schools, and squeeze a shilling each out of them tor a statue in honour of a deceased gentleman, of whom in their innocence the little ones may never have heard. That little game you, sir, have promptly and effectually spoiled, as far as this provincial district is concerned, at any rate. _ This question of the erection of statuen to rival statesmen is becoming embarrassing, as well as expensive. In China there is a method much simpler, and quite as effective as ours, of doing honour to departed or departing worth. Outer barbarians who have penetrated to the cities of the interior of the Flowery Land have been much puzzled by finding in the arches of the city gates everywhere a miscellaneous collection of old boots ! The Rev. Father Hue, a Roman Catholic missionary, who laboured long iu the land, explains the phenomenon. He tells us in his Memoirs that it is, or was, the universal custom when a great official was transferred from one district to another, or from this world to the next, for his friends and admirers to accompany the person to the City Gate, and there with friendly violence pull off his boots, and hang them up as a memorial. If we could be persuaded to follow aliens in this matter, a pair of the historical " hobnailed boots" 011 the Tarauaki Breakwater, and a pair of " elastic sides" on the Wanganui bridge, might satisfy the devotional aspirations of 'lories and Liberals, on very easy terms. We ought not, I think, to scorn to profit by the teaching of the Celestials in this and other matters. They were Theosophists, and inventors in art and science, when our noble ancestors were running wild in woods, painting their bodies with woad, and killing each other, or the game upon which _ they subsisted, with stone clubs and flint-tippea arrows. I offer the suggestion to impertinent Jones, of Wellington, and to memorial committees generally, gratia.— am, etc., X. June 15, 189:5.