LOCAL GOS

New Zealand Herald, Volume XXV, Issue 9082, 16 June 1888, Page 2 (Supplement)

LOCAL GOS

" Let me have audience for a woftf or two." — Shaksperß. Last week, when I wrote about the feeling that existed that we should give up the attempt to govern ourselves as a task which was above our moral powers, as well as a luxury which wo could not afford, I had forgotten that a good many years ago (more than twenty) the same idea was broached in Auckland. At that time the seat of Government had been taken from Auckland, the Imperial troops had been suddenly shipped away, it looked as if Waikato were to be deserted by the military settlers, while native raids and murders were common. The prospect was exceedingly black in Auckland. A public meeting was held on the subject, and a petition was drawn up and largely signed, asking the Home Government to withdraw tho constitution, and to send out someone who would govern New Zealand without a Legislative Council or House of Representatives. I remember that Mr. George Graham, who is now living in England, took part in the demonstration, and Mr. T. B. Hill, and, I think, Mr. Swanson. The petition was duly sent to tho Secretary of State for the Colonies, or to liev Majesty the Queen, but nothing more was heard of it. Things changed, and times got better. They had a chance to do so then, for the taxation was light. The people of Auckland wore diverted to other things by the discovery of tho Thames goldfield and the commencement of the public works scramble. But when Mr. George Graham went to England he was determined to find out what became of that petition. He found it in a pigeon-hole of some office. The then Governor, through whom the petition had to be sent, had put on the corner the following minute :— " The persons signing this petition arc of no political note.—G. BoWKN." We have not gone so far as our predecessors in IStHi : we have not cast ourselves at the foot of the throno. In all likelihood if we did, Sir W. Jervois might put his toot on us in tho same way, unless indeed that we asked that he should be appointed the Dictator at a handsome salary. No ;I am afraid there is no help for us in that way. As we have made our bed, so we must lie in it. The only consolation is to abuse those who persuaded us that it would be a tine thing to go into a burst of extravagance.

The larrikinism, disorder, and confusion which prevailed in the Syinonds-street cemetery on Sunday last, at the funeral of Mr. Waddel, were m&t painful to every person of right feeling present. The cemetery is not the place for a mob. It is tilled with little fences surrounding tho narrow resting places of those who have pa-ssed away, and the paths are narrow and steep. In such a place, when there is a large gathering of people, it is impossible to keep order, as the boys climb the trees and break down the palings. In all such cases it would be better to prevent the public from getting into the cemetery, and only to admit t he immediate relations and friends of the de-cea-sed.

The candlestick controversy still rages, and if we have now fewer letters on the subject in the Hkrald, it is, I suspect, because they are choked off, and not because fewer people are writing. There seems a kind of feud in every Anglican congregation about practices and ceremonial. I believe that in St. Sepulchre's Church last Sunday some kind of innovation was commenced, some singing of something or another instead of saying it, and thereupon a prominent member of the congregation got up, and he and all his family tiled out of the building. He drow the line between singing and saying, and condemned the former as Papisticivf in its tendency.

There is a very dangerous .spirit in the country notv, to winch I call the attention of Sir Harry Atkinson. A friend was narrating to me the other day how he had been " done" by the property tax authorities, who had lain in wait for him and simply fleeced him. He proceeded, "Do you think I would blame any man for smuggling now? Do you think I would check any such thing if I saw it? Why, I would defraud the Government myself if I got a chance, because I see they have not the slightest compunction about defrauding me." This is no doubt a very wrong view to take, but it is none the less natural. That tax must be wrong and impolitic, which is the means of creating a feeling of irritation in the minds .of so many.

The Foxian fiat has gone forth, and the "yellow-back" must take a backseat—or rather a back shelf—in the library of the Young Men's Christian Association rooms. Sir William Fox, as chairman of public meetings, especially religious or seniireligiouti ones, is nothing , if not oracular, solemn, and purgative. At the annual meeting of the Young Men's Christian Association the other evening he grievously lamented, and shook his head lugubriously over the fact that "yellow-backs" were allowed a place on the library shelves. I suppose it will be admitted that the style and character of a book is to be gauged, to some extent, by what it contains, and not entirely by the colour of its binding. I think Sir William Fox will himself admit the soundness of this view, because from long habit and experience of the yellow (literary) agony he should be a thoroughly qualified judge.

But why make a btte-noir of this yellowback ? (Pardon this French bull), pfas this gallant literary reformer never met in his wide experience a novel in a yellow binding of a decidedly elevating, purifying, and ennobling character ? Has lie ever read "Under Which Lord," or "The Parson of Dunmore," or "God and the Man," or "Hard Ca.sh," or "The Silence of Dean Maitland" (the latter a recent work). I have seen all these admirable books in yellow, but it did not strike me that their forje or beauty were impaired by reason of the binding.

Now, this gentleman, who would introduce a sort of Index Expurgatorius into the literary branch of the Institution, has, by implication, given a nasty jar to others besides the worldly-minded members or visitors who peruse yellow-backs. How about the Selection Committee, who had not the benefit of Dr. Laiehley's vast experience and wondrous eclectic faculty to guide them ? Of course they come under the knightly ban. And the reckless, thoughtless booksellers who sold these yellow-backs for filthy lucre—some of them prominent members of the institution, too— surely they are grievously culpable?

Of course, I am aware that the term "yellow-back" has a special and conventional meaning as applied to railway novels of a purely sensational, frivolous, or impure type. But as it i.s highly improbable that books of such a character are in the Voting Men's Christian Association library, the remarks of the chairman must be held to apply to all novels not historical ; he draws the line at those. Sir William Fox also took occasion to inveigh again.st what he evidently regards as the pernicious practice of introducing purely secular topics for discussion on the Young Men's Christian Association platform. Now, anything more narrow-minded and absurd could hardly bo imagined. It is just that ultra-Puritanic spirit which is killing the Sailors' Rest, and would, if carried out, render the winter evening lectures of the Young Men's Christian Association a conspicuous failure. Contrast the chairman's plan with that adopted by the Rev. J. S. Hill—a gentleman who, in conjunction with the energetic secretary, has (lone more for the institution's progress and popularity than any halfdozen others.

Mr.Hill inaugurated a new departure by personally conducting debates, and giving lectures on political and social subjects. He, at all events, with his broad, Christian, liberal view of things, recognised the fact that the specially-religious scope and purport of the institution should not necessarily exclude the consideration and discussion of questions outside those bearing strictly on religion, bub nevertheless affect the wellbeing of the community. It was a relief to find Mr. Spurgeon entering the lists, and defending the action of the Lecture Committee in introducing secular subjects into their season-programmes.

But the nautical Tarawera outburst has nothing but what is repulsive in its vulgar, hideous, oath-compelling, diabolical yells and screams. Cannot our Harbour Board, in its plenitude of wisdom, invest some official with power to act in the capacity of suppressor of harbour nuisances? As a triumph of ingenuity in producing unearthly, blood-curdling sounds, the Tarawera steam-horn must certainly be awarded the prize medal. Dante, in his most sulphurous moods, could never have imagined anything more Sheolitic or suggestive of Hades-colic than this Tarawera torture, which tho Union S.S. Company provides, at regular intervals, just to make the Auckland citizens - bear in mind that life must have its penances as well as its pleasures. Seriously, now, has the affable and popular local agent of the company ever taken into consideration the genuine annoyance and distress caused to people suffering from insomnia, or to invalids generally, by those fearful noises from the steam-horn. Probably lie has not, and in that belief I would remind him of Hood's lines—

Kvil is wrought by want of thought, As well a.s want of heart. There is a good deal of force and meaning in those lines, and if the quoting of them leads to any practical result in the suppression of those dreadful screams and wails, it will be a "consummation devoutly to be wished."

I cannot guess what can be tho object of keeping up such unearthly screams for such a length of tin.e. It appears as if some mischievous boy had got hold of the valve handle, and was "keeping it up" out of mere devilment. It could not be to awake the people about the wharf. They would nil be moving by that time of the morning, and besides, the steamer was not under the necessity of going away again within an hour. Some person suggested that it was to rouse up Dr. Lewis, so that ho might come down and pass the ship. Surely it is not necessary to get up an earthquake and to shatter the nerves of 60,000 people to get Dr. Lewis out, of bed ab eight o'clock in the morning. Wouldn't it be better to get up a subscription to pay someone on the wharf to telephone for Dr. Lewis when the steamer shows round the Heads ?

During the examination of a Maori witness in the Supreme Court the other day Mr. O'Meaghor objected to the services of the interpreter being brought into requisition, on the ground that the witness understood English. That gentleman, however, with all his forensic fertility of resource, failed to gain his point, tmd was duly sat upon by His Honor. There are not many instances in which a Maori witness can dispense with an interpreter, but they do occur. Some of my readers may remember the celebrated case of Mohi versus Craig , , a few years ago. A Maori witness was being examined, and the interpreter, in 'translating his answers literally, failed to convey their actual moaning. After some ten minutes' colloquy between Judge Arney and the interpreter, the witness astonished and amused Bench and Bar alike by saying in purest English, " If you will allow me, your Honor, I think I can explain the matter to the satisfaction of the Court." Judge, jury, counsel, and spectators all had their eachinatory muscles set agoing, and the interpreter's occupation was gone, so far as that particular witness was concerned.