IT IS TOWN TALK

Free Lance, Volume XIV, Issue 722, 2 May 1914, Page 26

IT IS TOWN TALK

—That the bacteriologists reckon that kissing must go. We believe it' already goes with a lot of Wellington girls. —That ' Mr. Massey has discovered that Northern roads' are in a bad state for want of "metal" —otherwise "tin." —That "autumn hate for women are full of eccentricities." They will be when the dears put their heads in them. ■ -—That there is a case of small-pox at Newtown. Keep your hair on. New-, town, in this instance, is a suburb of Sydney. -—That Mr. Massey will deal with the Hindoos next session. Tut! .Tutl —he ought to dear with white hawkers. Support local industry! • —That Wellington. City -Engineer Morton has gone to Sydney to spend his annual holidays—and some of that £300 rise at the same time. —That it is the boast of Mr. Herdman that the Government have had a thorough spring cleaning. Rats, however, still remain on the premises. ' —That soience has discovered what is dubbed the fatigue , bug. It is getting easier and easier every day to find an excuse for the Government stroke. -—That motorists in cases of emergency are using; whisky as fuel for their cars—and on Sundays, too. Won't the New Zealand Alliance please take action P —That an. English court has ordered a -woman with seven children to repay a debt for 30s rent at the rate of a penny per month. At this pace the amount will be wiped off in 1944. -—That "some women passing through Palmerston recently by train were smoking cigarettes. Is this, the thin end of the wedge? Is woman.going to invade the smoking carriage next, ilithertT the Bacred sanctum of mere man? . —That "ex-Bang Manuel of Portugal is a frequent patron of moving picture; •shows." Some > fine day a picture of Miss Gaby Deslys will flicker across the screen and Manuel will saunter round to the stage door after the show from sheer force of habit- ' —That Professor Mackenzie,. Messrs. Geo. Wilson, James Speed, _ John Duthie, and a' thejither of Wee-lington's bra' Scots are gang to pit on the kilties to make a wee bit of a show for Sir lan's arrival. . Ah, but it would be a gran' seeght. . —That D. McLaren has been elected one of the committee of the Orphans' Club. Surely this is not our "Davie who is going to foregather with "the boys" of a Saturday night P If so, we should so dearly love to see him dance a fling at one of the regular symposiums. —-That a country paper bewails the fact that a lady, who had her purse containing; eight sovereigns stolen and had advertised for its return without success, has had no reply. "The thief,' the paper observes, "is evidently minus a conscience." But, what is more to the point, for, Sykes, he. is plus eight pounds. —That if Police-Inspector Hendrey has his way, the destructor will come in for a new use. In court a few days ago he favoured the destructor as a fit place for a cjouple of male prisoners of a particularly degraded type. One of the men's name was Bull. Would the Inspector make beef of him? -—That a Viennese barber has had to shell out £50 to a customer he cut while shaving. The cut was caused by his wife rushing in to proclaim the news that he had won - £1000 in a lottery. Wellington tonsorial artists, who possibly fracture the law occasionally by having a flutter in Tatt's, will hereby take warning. —That motor car accidents might decrease considerably if the example of New Jersey is followed. There the son of a leading citizen is forbidden by the authorities to drive a car in the State because he motored recklessly. Such a) law is drastic, indeed, but the least that can be said against it is that it surely would-be effective. Local "shovers, etc., had better bdwar© lest Wellington adopts similar measures to subvert the motor "hog." —That the New- Zealand "Times" the other morning had a little tilt at the Minister for Marine for trying to fill Lake Taupo with Mercer shrimps. Did the "Times" think that because the said Minister's name was Fisher that he must be concerned in this shrimp-catching business? Whether or no, it was an-, other fisher this time. Perhaps if the "Times" had "Bell" r ted the Internal Affaire Department it might have been nearer the maTk.